


And that's Showbiz... Kid.

by fabricdragon



Series: The Queen and The Crown [1]
Category: Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: Canon Divergence - The Reichenbach Fall, Canon-Typical Violence, Crossdressing, Drag Queens, Explicit Language, Highlander References, Homophobic Language, M/M, Musicals, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, POV Sebastian Moran, Performance Art, Pining, Queen (Band) References, References to Chicago - Kander & Ebb & Fosse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-14
Updated: 2020-07-10
Packaged: 2021-03-01 20:29:01
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 21
Words: 51,214
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23643112
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fabricdragon/pseuds/fabricdragon
Summary: Sebastian Moran is totally utterly NOT hung up on his boss, Jim Moriarty....but he just might be falling for a drag performer named Roxie...
Relationships: Sebastian Moran/Jim Moriarty
Series: The Queen and The Crown [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1776823
Comments: 180
Kudos: 48
Collections: The Queen's Hidden Lounge





	1. I am NOT hung up on the boss!

**Author's Note:**

  * For [InnerSpectrum](https://archiveofourown.org/users/InnerSpectrum/gifts).

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A gathering of the regiment- and a few other friends- at a drag performance

“Sebastian Moran… you are pathetic.” Sebastian dragged a hand through his hair and stared into his closet.  
“Are you seriously agonizing over what to wear to a drag club?” Quincy laughed from the sofa and drank the last drops out of the beer bottle.

“Boss has me second guessing what to wear to everything.” he muttered.

“Isn’t he out of town?”

“Yeah, or maybe… anyway he’s somewhere and we’re off duty for the week,” Sebastian answered in a distracted fashion and finally dragged out an old t-shirt and a leather jacket. Moriarty had just raised an eyebrow at him the last time he wore them- around him anyway- and then told him to change before the meeting, so apparently it didn't meet with his poshness’ approval.

Sebastian chewed on his lip for a bit and then waved them at Quincy, “What do you think?”

“I think i havent seen you in your leathers and jeans in too long: you always look good in jeans, but you might end up getting hit on by way too many gay guys…”

“Boss made me change the last time I wore it.” 

“Boss thinks anyone not in a designer suit is under dressed, but I bet he was afraid you’d look better than he did.”

“No one looks better than he does; man has a natural gift for clothes.”

“Well, he’s gay, isn’t he?”

Sebastian rolled his eyes, “So is Louis!”

“Louis… is a bad example, man.”

“Just being gay doesnt automatically mean you have fashion sense.” Sebastian got dressed in his old jeans, t shirt and jacket and sized himself up in the mirror… he thought he looked good, but….

“You look FINE!” Quincy groaned and put his hands over his face, then he looked up very dubiously, “You are NOT actually trying to pick up a drag queen?”

Sebastian snorted, “Too high maintenance, mate.”

Quincy grinned, “You mean the boss isn't?”

Sebastian just stared at him, “The BOSS only notices I'm alive to give orders or tell me I’m dressed badly!”

“Oh never said HE was into YOU, but YOU sure have a thing for HIM!”

“I do NOT have a THING for Moriarty!” Sebastian protested.

Quincy looked around nervously as though he might appear if you mentioned his name. “Right...so we’re going to Neal’s bachelor and Donald’s birthday bash at the drag club, and you are TOTALLY not trying to pick anyone up, which is why you are obsessing over your clothes.” Quincy snagged another bottle of Sebastian’s beer, “And you don't have a thing for the boss.” He threw his coat on and headed for the door.

Sebastian hesitated before they walked out, “Do… Do you think I should change? Boss didn't like this outfit…”

Quincy suddenly stopped being Sebastian’s best pal and the man who got him this gig when he was discharged, and turned into the stone cold killer of the 1st Bangalore Pioneers that he had been. “If you don't get your arse into the cab RIGHT NOW i will use your damn closet for demolition practice!”

Sebastian laughed, “Right, Major- lead on!- into the valley of fake eyelashes and high heels!”

Quincy smirked and started reciting, “Half a league, half a league,Half a league onward! All in the valley of Death rode the six hundred!”

Sebastian threw an arm around him and snagged back his beer, “Forward, the Light Brigade! Charge for the guns!” he said.”

Quincy got them into the cab and gave the driver the address and then turned and swiped the bottle back, “Into the valley of Death Rode the six hundred!”

… They went back and forth with the lines, ignoring the cabby’s attempts to join in- mostly because he kept getting them wrong.

…

It was an odd lot of men gathered outside of the club for the party: all old friends, most of them ex military- and more than a few currently in illegal lines of work. Neal- who was getting married in two days with Sebastian and Quincy as two of his groomsmen- had lost something of a wager and had to have his bachelor party here instead of the strip club, and Donald- whose birthday party was always an excuse to find an even more outlandish venue than last years- was happy to share the party with him. Donald was three sheets to the wind already, and two of the other lads from the regiment were holding him up… 

They actually got warned by the bouncer that if they caused the slightest trouble they would be out on their ears.

A few of the lads got a bit huffy over that as they found a couple of booths in the back, but Quincy pointed out that between the lot of them they had two different underworld connections, one official probation, and one fellow who had somehow managed to hold onto his security clearance… so they couldn't afford to draw any attention.

Eventually the men settled down to some serious drinking… and critiquing the opening acts.

...

“Good God, did he put the makeup on with a trowel?”

…

“Fuck me! Why do these fags always have such killer legs?”

…

“Am i that drunk or does he really look like a bird?”

“I think that one is?”

“No, that's a bloke, but… good job there.”

…

Sebastian was actually having a good time- some of the performers didn't look like women at all, but he suspected they weren’t trying to: it was a stage piece. Some of them looked very convincing, and- at least up on stage and under the lights- were rather spectacular.

The opening acts were all sorts: comedy, music, dancing- one rather amazing performer juggled glitter covered balls despite having fake eyelashes that HAD to have blocked ‘her’ vision. The main acts were apparently all lip sync and dance numbers and the quality of costuming went up incredibly.

Donald passed out part way through the first of the main acts and they sent him home in a cab at the intermission. Neal had put up with it all in good grace but took the opportunity to escape by “helping Donald get home”. The others found an excuse, or left with their friends, so that by the end of the second of the three main acts their numbers were down to three plus Sebastian.

Sebastian waved over a waitress and ordered another drink during the intermission before the third act.

“Don’t want to cut out, Colonel?” Quincy raised an eyebrow at him.

“Nah, it's a good show, actually- I’ll stay to the end.”

“Well, I’m out,” Tobin nodded, “It is a good show, but unlike you blokes I have work in the morning!” Tobin had his security clearance still and no one asked what he did- he didn't ask what they did either and it all worked out.

Murphy somehow had picked up one of the women in the audience- Sebastian was fairly certain they were really women- who was there with a bachelorette party, so by the time they announced the third act it was just Quincy and himself, and Quincy looked like he might step out for a smoke and not come back.

The MC came back out, resplendent in a glittery pink wig- it was their third wig change so far- and announced, “Our last musical act of the evening, Queens and Kings! The incredible, the incomparable! Roxie!”

The music started up with the opening medley for the musical Chicago, and Roxie Hart strutted onto the stage.

… and Sebastian suddenly realized the difference between a ‘good performer’ and a star.


	2. Roxie

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in which Sebastian suddenly becomes a big fan of Chicago....

Roxie strutted out to the opening 'monologue' of the piece. She walked in high heels like she lived in them every day-who knows, maybe she did- but they weren't the insane heels some of the other performers had worn… 

Sebastian had a sneaking suspicion that the outfit was a replica of the stage costume, because it wasn't designed to conceal a male physique. Roxie had broad shoulders and muscular arms and wasn't wearing much, if any, padding as far as Sebastian could tell, but the way ‘she’ walked and the attitude? That sold it…

And by the time she spread her arms in triumph to the line "with all this publicity? I got me a world full of YES!"...

Sebastian didn't care.

She was flirting with the audience and so high on applause you could get a contact buzz by the time she got to “I'm gonna be a celebrity—that means Somebody everyone knows!”

She was making all those extra long fake eyelashes and exaggerated curves pale in comparison when she tilted her head down and fluttered her hands and purred, “They're gonna recognize my eyes, My hair, my teeth, my boobs, my nose…”

The only thing Sebastian couldn’t imagine was that THIS creature had ever- EVER- been just some dumb mechanics wife…

Her fingers trailed suggestively down the beaded costume as she threw her head back- baring a long pale throat- and sang, “And I'll appear in a lavalier that goes All the way down to my waist!” and when she extended those fingers to imagine rings on them? Sebastian could almost feel them running across his skin… smell the perfume...

She danced with a chair as though it was a whole chorus of men- the men singing in the musical number that … 

...it was nearly impossible for Sebastian to remember that THIS Roxie wasn’t singing!

She spun to face away from the audience and was clearly making love to herself as she sang about the audience loving her….

“And I love them for lovin' me...And we ~love~ each other…” she turned her head toward the audience, looking over her shoulder as the beads shimmered and flashed over her ass, “And that's cause none of us got enough love in our childhoods…” she smirked and spun to face them again and Sebastian swore she stared straight AT him and she crooked her finger in a ‘come here’ gesture and Sebastian was pulled up out of his seat...

“And that's showbiz... kid.” she winked and turned...and If he hadn't been behind the table he would have walked straight up on stage…

…

“Roxie… Hart!” and as the voiceover gave a faint giggle, Roxie’s nose wrinkled and… and she MUST be the one singing that?

And then there was an avalanche of sound as everyone applauded and Sebastian couldn't possibly clap any harder and…

What snapped him out of it was the edge of the table impacting a sensitive part of his anatomy.

_Ow!_

He immediately tried to get to the front… he’d never wanted anyone’s autograph but he WANTED… he had to…

Quincy grabbed his shirt, “woah! Down, Tiger! What the hell got into you?”

“That… that was INCREDIBLE!”

“Yeah… yeah it was… but uh…”

Sebastian shook him off and made his way to the front- along with apparently half the audience.

One of the bouncers was saying in a patient fashion, “Miss Roxie never does encores, and she NEVER meets with fans- she does have a limited number of autographed photos-”

People started shouting: Sebastian managed to get one by paying what he was fairly certain was a ridiculous sum of money… and he. did. not. CARE.

…  
“Seb… since when do you pay that much money for anything that isn't a weapon or booze?”

“You don't pay that much for booze,” Seb answered distractedly as he tried to figure out where to hang this… “oh, i’m going to have to get it framed!”

“He’s… not even a girl!”

“Quince, that is the least relevant thing about her.”

Quincy dropped him off at his flat, muttering the entire time, and went home.

…

By the wedding two days later- well not quite two- ‘Roxie’ had been temporarily framed and hung up to stay safe, and he had purchased a copy of Chicago and was waiting for the video to be delivered.  
He had managed to get a good enough look at Renee Zellweger as Roxie Hart to find out that ‘Roxie’ was either a master costumer or had paid someone a small fortune for such an exacting replica of the movie outfit, and to be a bit startled to find out that Miss Zellweger had a rather muscular shoulder and upper arm as well…

Which of course made that choice of persona fit their body type…

_Damn._

From what he saw as an excerpt though? His Roxie had a hell of a lot more charisma than the original…

Of course that might be because this was in person and that was a recording?

Obviously he would have to go back and… compare the performances.

Right

For reasons.

...

He tried to talk his friends into going back to the club, but of course the only one who had SEEN Roxie was Quincy… and he had other plans…

Sebastian gave himself a pep talk in his bathroom mirror and went down by himself…

…

Roxie wasn't performing tonight.

The staffers all got this ‘oh Lord it's another one’ when he tried to find out what her performance schedule was… apparently she had a devoted following.

Luck was, however, with him- and it had been noted by several people that Sebastian and Lady Luck had a rather hot on again/off again thing going- because one of the stage managers? Turned out to be from a sister battalion….

They swapped old stories- and Sebastian bought him a drink and handed over his cigarettes- and Anthony let him in on a few secrets…

“...Nah, Miss Roxie isn’t a professional Queen- my guess is she has money of her own.” Anthony shrugged, “She’s not on the circuit, only shows up occasionally and the whole “mystery celebrity” thing- plus the number of devoted fan boys? Means the boss is thrilled… guys like you show up for every show they can, HOPING that Roxie will be there… “

“Damn,” Sebastian let his head fall back on the bricks. “How far in advance do you usually find out?”

“Usually? When she shows up to stake out her dressing room,” he laughed, “but sometimes we get advance notice.” he raised an eyebrow, “fair warning- Roxie cancels on us sometimes… seriously i think she either has a real money job with flakey hours, or family that wouldn't approve- or both…”

Sebastian nodded, “so how much-”

“To get a phone call or text when i find out?” he smirked, “Man, i pay my RENT on that...but seeing as you’re a fellow vet?” he named a monthly sum that Sebastian was FAIRLY certain he should flinch at… but instead he just handed it over.

Anthony smiled and shook his head as he pocketed the cash, “Yeah, you can join all her other worshippers…”

“You don't know ANYTHING about her?”

“She likes expensive drinks, expensive chocolates, and thinks most people’s gifts show a lack of style.” he laughed, “never did find out what she thought a stylish gift was? Maybe a diamond bracelet or something?”

Sebastian was about to leave when Anthony spoke up, “there’s a chance- a slim chance- that she’ll show up at the theme night next month.”

Sebastian turned, “Theme night?”

“Well, just an impression of mine?” Anthony hesitated and Sebastian nodded, “The Queen likes Queen- and it's a Queen tribute and competition.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J-_HTUapDQo the performance of Renee Zellweger as Roxie Hart from the movie
> 
> https://www.marketsquarejewelers.com/blogs/msj-handbook/the-history-beauty-of-the-lavalier a nice article with pictures on the history and style of the Lavalier
> 
> Chicago (2002) - Renée Zellweger as Roxie Hart imdb link to Renee Zellwegger as Roxie Hart
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chicago_(2002_film) wikipedia for the movie/musical Chicago.


	3. Yas Queen!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in which Sebastian is outed as a Roxie fanboy, Moriarty is a VERY good actor, and Sebastian is very busy...  
> but still gets back for Queen night.  
> (song link in notes)

The next day Sebastian got a call from the boss to come in for a mission briefing; when he got there it was the core crew only: Neal, Quincy, Harris and Franklin- minus a handful of people because they were off on assignment elsewhere. It was either a great honor, or a disaster, that Sebastian was in that number...

Quincy held up a hand to clasp as Sebastian came in and grabbed a seat, “Boss got delayed- he’ll be here soon, though.”

Sebastian got himself settled- hating the fact that only the boss’ chair had a direct view of the door: almost all of them ended up sitting sort of at an angle trying to keep it in their peripheral vision.

Franklin looked him up and down and smirked, “Nice suit.”

Sebastian reflexively checked his suit suspiciously, “whyyy? What's wrong?”

Neal rolled his eyes over his magazine, “Because you are clearly dressed to impress: you don’t normally get out of your casuals, so…”

Franklin asked, “Thought you were chasing after some drag performer? What, she likes suits?”

Sebastian clapped a hand over his face, “I have no idea if she likes suits! I only know the boss HATES my casuals!”

Quincy poked at him, “Well you look fine, but this isn't an assignment just a briefing.”

Harris piped up, “What’s this about you chasing a drag performer?”

Sebastian groaned, “I’m not… I haven't even MET her!”

“Aren’t drag performers men?” Harris sounded- and looked- rather confused.

Moriarty’s deep voice from the door made them all jump, “Drag Queens are men, Drag Kings are women… what brought up this topic, gentlemen?”

Everyone stood up until he got himself settled and waved a hand for them to resume their seats. Moriarty was dressed to perfection in a ‘simple suit’ which meant he could pass for a businessman or politician: Sebastian’s eye caught on the skull patterned tie clip detail.

Quincy cleared his throat, “we’d gone to a drag club for Neal and Donald’s party…”

Moriarty gave what was, for him, a fond eye roll, “Oh yes… Donald’s annual attempt to poison himself.” he nodded at Neal, “I did hear you made it to the wedding, so congratulations.”

“Thank you, sir, and… thank you for the wedding present.” Neal had quietly told Sebastian and Quincy that he had gotten what could only be called a ‘considerable’ gift check with instructions to invest it for his family.

Moriarty nodded, but instead of going on about business he tented his hands and asked, “Drag club?”

Neal nodded, “Apparently it… got a lot better after the initial acts? I went home on the early side...” he looked over at Quincy and Sebastian.

Quincy nodded, “The opening acts were… alright? Some of them. The three main acts were pretty good…”

Moriarty was doing something with his desk drawers and pens- he had a pen collection- and making a disinterested non-committal noise...

Sebastian protested, "Pretty good? Yeah the FIRST two were ‘pretty good’ but Roxie was fantastic!”

“Oh lord here we go again,” Neal grinned and looked over at Mister Moriarty, “sorry, sir, but he’s been all stars in his eyes since the show.”

Moriarty blinked several times slowly and cleared his throat, “This… Roxie… was that good, Moran?”

“Uh… yes, sir…” Sebastian suddenly realized he didn't know what Moriarty thought about drag performers, “She… yes, sir…” 

_Sebastian, pull yourself together and give the man a report!_ He chided himself and sat up straighter, “Yes, sir: a lot of charisma, fantastic performance, and… very believable lip syncing to say the least. I managed to find some images of the movie Roxie Hart to compare to and… well, either they paid a fortune for the work or they are a master costumer, because the costume was-”

Quincy patted him on the shoulder, “Seb spent far too much money on an autographed picture after the show, and then tried to talk me into going back after the wedding, but… yes, sir, in fairness he...she? Was damn good.” 

“Hmm.” Moriarty closed his eyes a bit and appeared to be considering, “...That is unlikely to cross into my business,” he drummed his fingers absently, “but it's always good to know about any potential new acts and entertainment- one of my clients might be interested…”

Sebastian suggested, “well… all of the acts were at least fun? But… yes, sir, if Roxie decided to be a more regular performer i think she’d make it as a ‘name’ pretty fast.”

Quincy pointed out, “Seb, you’ve seen her do ONE act. Now, admittedly, she was damn GOOD at it, but you don't make a career on one act.”

“...she has a hell of an established fan base…”

“Gentlemen!” Moriarty sounded firm and a bit grim, but the corners of his lips were turning up and… _uh oh, he had that ‘brilliant idea’ look_ \- everyone kind of braced, but all he said was, “As entertaining as this might be, can we get down to business?”

And then they were busy.

Very busy.  
Sebastian got a text about Roxie showing up for a set when he was in Germany, but apparently she wasn't at the club much. 

Sebastian did get to see a bit more of Moriarty- who was apparently pulling back from public contact: usually pretending he was an agent of Moriarty’s instead- and he at least seemed approving of some of Sebastian’s better suits… 

...UNfortunately the boss shipped him off on an assignment right when that Queen tribute was scheduled.

It wasn't like Sebastian could tell Mister Moriarty ‘Gee, no, sir i can’t do your job because i have to be here for some entertainment…’ Not and expect to still be breathing.

So he packed up and headed off…

And Lady Luck smiled on him again.

It turned out that between some of his old disreputable contacts, and his prior travels in the region, he was able to get to the target a good three days earlier than expected. The boss hadn’t given him any restrictions of when or how, just “dead, minimal collateral damage”: Sebastian figured a neat shot through the head, and the body not likely to be found until morning? Certainly qualified…

He was on his way back to London before the body had cooled.

He got back to his flat with JUST enough time to shower, change, and throw a bit of caffeine down his throat before turning around and paying far too much money for a seat right up front...

He got a quiet nod from Anthony- yes, Roxie had arrived.

Sebastian gave a silent ‘Thank you’ to Lady Luck and ordered something to eat, a good beer, and an extra large coffee- “Keep the coffee coming, please,” and settled in to enjoy the show.

…

The format was simple: the competitors each had a solitary performance to their choice of Queen song- and it had to be Queen, not a Freddie Mercury solo- and then the final contestants would all have to perform to a Queen song chosen by the MC…

By the time Roxie came on, Sebastian was heartily SICK of “Killer Queen” and a handful of other songs- he’d moved “I want to break free” off his play list for at least a few months…

Roxie walked out onto the stage wearing a floor length shimmering white gown and a red cloak- her blonde hair was longer and falling just slightly over one side of her face...and when she pushed the hood back and let the cloak fall off her back Sebastian couldn't help but smile.

Anyone who knew saw the tribute to Freddie Mercury- all that was missing was the crown.

She looked like she might have a few more curves than in her other outfit, but that might have just been an illusion created by the drape of the cloak? 

She walked in with all the grace of- well, a queen- and took a position center stage. She looked up and Sebastian swore that he met her eyes just for a moment…

He almost missed the piano introduction… staring at her- staring at him…

And then she lidded her eyes down and the lights went down except for a single spotlight...and the next time she looked up was to start singing…

“When… I’m… Gone…” Freddie’s voice in his upper register sounding SO much like a woman could be singing… and she was- Sebastian would have bet money on it.

“No need to wonder if I ever think of you….”

And he could pretend she was singing just to him as the rest of the stage, and the audience went dark and the spot light was on Roxie alone.

Her hands reached out and cupped an imaginary light, she looked up at the moon and you could see her throat working… she extended a hand… she smiled and sang directly to Sebastian… at least in his imagination...

…”Just close your pretty eyes and you can be with me…”

He couldn't close them for a moment: he couldn't miss any of it.

…”Let us never lose the lessons we have learned.”...

And there was just a figure in shimmering white and blood red slowly looking out over them all in the darkness… and then the spotlight went out and she was gone.

There were people applauding until their hands hurt. There were people standing in stunned silence until they remembered to clap… and there were a lot of people crying- Sebastian tried to pretend he wasn’t one of them as he applauded.

They had to call an intermission.

A handful of brave souls tried to follow that- Sebastian felt sorry for them.

As far as he was concerned the competition was over and done- just hand her the prize and the big question was who came in second…

But no, they were going to go ahead…

The MC came out and held up an excellent replica of the crown and announced, “Queens and Kings- we had guessed which songs a number of our contestants would choose, and we wanted to pick something a little different for our final competition…” he named two of the other people and Roxie, and then said there would be fifteen minutes for them to adjust their make up (and one presumed listen to the competition song) and then they would all be performing to…

“Gimme the prize!”

Sebastian’s eyes widened- appropriate, very appropriate, but a DRASTIC departure from her performance song…

_Could she…?_

He looked over to where the three Drag Queens were standing and saw the other two trying to plan out their performances quickly- one looking worriedly at her outfit…

But Roxie? Roxie just smiled and…

Oh, that smile was wicked and cruel and if you took off the lipstick and the long eyelashes hiding her eyes it was a mirror to Moriarty’s smile…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Teo Torriatte with lyrics: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ge18n2JCwBs 


	4. Gimme the Prize!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 1\. the links to both the "movie music video" and the lyrics video are in the chapter notes.  
> 2\. i am an OLD school Highlander fan, and Roxie's performance makes more sense if you know the song, and the movie, pretty well.

Sebastian stopped worrying: if there was one thing working for Moriarty had taught him it was that THAT kind of smile? Meant victory most absolute- and often bloody... and adding in the obvious doubt and concern on the other two?

This competition was OVER; all he had to do was sit back and enjoy the performance… and hope there wasn't any ACTUAL blood left on the stage from the slaughter that was about to happen.

A few of the other Roxie fans actually looked worried- Pfft! 

Sebastian considered Roxie’s habit of avoiding the fans, and the odds of getting her present to her afterwards, and called Anthony over, “Could you send this back to Miss Roxie?” 

He scribbled, “For the winner,” on the card and tucked it under the bow. 

Anthony started to say something and then just shrugged and took it away. It wasn't a pretty wrapping job, but Sebastian hoped the contents would make up for it…

…

They had the stage divided in thirds: competitors could walk off the stage into the audience (if they wanted) but not cross the taped lines onto the other performers' areas.

As far as Sebastian could tell they had put Roxie off to one side to try to give the others a chance, but all it meant to him was that he had to turn in his chair- it brought back odd comparisons to sitting in Moriarty’s office waiting…

Roxie had her red cloak fully wrapped around herself and her hood pulled up (and almost over her face) and was hanging back on her section of the stage- a fool might have taken it for doubt, but she was barely concealing the smirk… _oh she had PLANS…_

When the music started growling from the speakers the other two started moving and… _whatever_. Sebastian’s eyes were locked on Roxie- a red shape standing at the back of the stage…

She melted down into a crouch- a red puddle on the floor….

The voice over of the news reporter whined out of the speakers…”Also left a man's decapitated body lying on the floor next to his own severed head. The head, which at this time, has no name.

As the voice of the Kurgan growled, “I know his name.” Roxie slowly stood, rising out of the pool of blood red fabric...

… and with the opening roar, “Here I am!” Roxie threw the cloak back and strode forward like she was here to take your head and rule… and Sebastian couldn't have lifted a hand to defend himself.

One hand shot up in the air, “I am the one, the only one,”

The other hand, “I am the god of kingdom come.”

Both hands drawing down and her lip curled up and those eyes could kill a man: “Gimme the prize! Just gimme the prize!”

It was evident that Roxie knew the song COLD- she was singing along to the music and every curve of her mouth matched the voice… and her body language and gestures…

She

Owned

That

Song.

She was prowling the stage and gesturing and swirling the cloak like it was a pair of wings… she pulled the edge of it up and held the red fabric pouring out of her hand like blood….

The Kurgan’s monologue… she threw her head back and laughed and then threw her hand out “I have something to say!” and slowly curled her flat hand into a fist and a pointing finger…”It's better to burn out, than to fade away!”

She jumped and spun away with her cloak swirling behind her, “There can be only one!”

She walked to the edge of her section of the stage, toward the center and SNARLED…”Move over! I said move over!”

Sebastian’s lip curled up and he laughed as the poor performer at center stage froze in place… staring at Roxie...

Roxie had already turned and stalked away… 

and she vaulted off the stage!...

And she picked up one of the other men’s drinks and threw it back…

And stalked over to Sebastian and grabbed his shirt in her hand and he was staring into eyes you could fall into forever they were so dark and the voice was growling and he would have given her anything she wanted if he only knew what she wanted and she was inches away from his face and ….

There was a snarl against his lips and a hand on the back of his head and she was somehow back up on stage before his shirt relaxed from her grip…

And she was standing, demanding fealty on the stage...

“There can be only one!”

…

Sebastian fell back in his chair and tried to remember how to breathe…

…

The rest of the evening was like snapshots...moments out of the night...

Roxie being handed a bouquet of red roses, with her red cloak and the royal crown on her head against the stark white of her gown…

And his gift, the lavalier he’d spotted in an antique shop, now dangling down the front of her dress…

Roxie picking up the pendant and holding it to her lips as she gave him a wink…

The London streets outside and everything feeling so unreal, and realizing he just MIGHT have been awake too long…

Falling into a bed that he dearly hoped was his, but he couldn't be bothered to check…

…

Some gawdaful thing made noise so he killed it

...

“SEB!” Quincy was shaking him and Seb tried to find his rifle and where was his gas mask and…

“Wrr? London?” Sebastian blinked confusedly at a Quincy who refused to stay in focus, but was TOTALLY in civilian clothes and standing in his bedroom.

“YES, you are in London and not out on assignment where you should be,” Quincy looked angry and a bit spooked, “And the Boss has been trying to phone you and you didn't answer….”

...3...2...1… the adrenaline hit like a warm rush up his spine. “What?!”

He struggled to find his phone… 

which was shattered on the floor. “uh…” he pointed at it.

“I’ll call the boss and tell him your phone was broken, YOU sober up and pull on your shoes because he wants you to report in and explain this!”

He was halfway to the Boss when he realized he was in his leather and denim.

“Quince! I gotta change, oh shit he’s gonna KILL me: I’m in jeans!”

“Brother, he’s gonna murder you if you make him wait one more minute- he might already kill you for not being where you’re supposed to be… oh dear GOD, you didn't skip out to go to that show did you?!”

“I did my job!” Sebastian protested.

“You better be able to prove it,” Quincy said grimly, “His mood wasn't improved by not being able to call you…”

“I don't know what happened to my phone!” and then he realized, “... oh shit… i uh… i think i just … sort of killed it because it kept making noise at me…”

Sebastian slunk into the meeting in the certain knowledge that this was going to be one more case where he didn't do anything wrong, but it was going to be bad anyway.

Moriarty was sitting behind his desk with his feet up when they came in. “I understand your phone was broken?”

“Yes, sir, sorry sir… apparently i smashed it when it… made noise at me.”

Sebastian began to believe he might live through this one when that got a flicker of a smirk at the corner of his mouth. “Oh.” he pulled his feet down and sat up, “Care to explain why you are here in London and not looking down a sniper scope right now?”

“I finished my job, sir, and came back early.”

A puzzled expression crossed Moriarty’s face, “you did?”

“Yes, sir… I managed to make contact with some old associates, and i did know a bit about the area, and because i was in place early i lucked out and spotted the target when he was easy to get to…”

Moriarty picked up his phone and typed; after a bit he put it down, “So you FINISHED the job you say? And came back early?”

“Yes, sir.”

“Why didn't you check in?”

“I’d been awake for… a while…” Sebastian sighed, “and when i was back in time for the show…”

Quincy was just staring at him, “you… Sebastian you DOG…”

Moriarty had a very odd look on his face, but then his phone beeped and he glanced at it… his eyebrows went up. “Well, damn…” he looked back at Sebastian, “My… apologies, Moran: I’m afraid i thought…” he shook his head and smiled faintly, “At the best i thought you were going to go BACK out to finish the job… it hadn’t occurred to me you got it done THAT fast.”

Sebastian could almost feel the finger being taken off a trigger. “Of… course, sir, it must have looked… pretty bad…” he cleared his throat carefully, “You said you just wanted him dead and… minimum collateral damage- i got a great shot and i doubt they even found his body for a while, so i turned around fast and got out of there...ah…”

“And went to a drag show.” Moriarty shook his head and chuckled.

“Well, yes sir? I’d been planning on going to that one for almost a month…”

Moriarty put his head down into his hand and shook his head; then he took a breath and picked his head back up, “Good show?”

“fantastic show- i used to LIKE Queen, now i think i love it!"

Quincy blinked and went, “oh, Queen the band!”

“Yeah, it was a Queen tribute and competition," Sebastian chuckled despite the tension, "If Roxie had murdered the competition any more she’d need to hire us for the clean up….”

“Must have gone well,” Moriarty waved a hand, “You have a lipstick smudge on your face.”

Quincy’s head snapped over and Sebastian brought his hand up slowly… “Oh… OH! Um… i… yes well i just… it all got a bit… hallucinatory toward the end- I’d been awake far too long… she… she jumped off the stage and…”

Moriarty looked at him and shook his head, “Next time call in,” and he flashed him that typical wicked smirk, “be a shame to get killed over a miscommunication, yes?” and he stretched his neck out the way he did

“Yes, sir, sorry sir. I … I do see how it could look.”

“But we’ve learned something?” Moriarty said idly as he started the usual “tidy the desk” motions that meant the meeting was over.

And every wicked smile, elegant gesture, and vicious glance was dancing through Sebastian’s poor sleep deprived head as he muttered, “Yes, sir: apparently i have a type.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gimme the Prize (lyrics) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vf4UhPuwoGE
> 
> Gimme the Prize (Movie video) https://youtu.be/EZQUVZKrH3I (TW for Highlander movie scenes including non-gory decapitation and violence against women)


	5. I'm so Tired

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which a very tired Sebastian Moran babbles at Jim Moriarty, and then at Quincy, and finally gets to go home...

Moriarty stopped half way through a motion and looked up, “you… have a type?”

Sebastian’s eyes widened as he realized… “Oh… Oh God… I said that out loud, didn’t i?”

Quincy just shook his head slowly, “That’s your grenade, mate,” he muttered, “YOU fall on it.”

Moriarty, unfortunately, was looking vaguely amused and a bit curious. “You have a TYPE, Moran? I wasn't aware that you had a track record of going to drag shows? Or is it blonde performers…?”

Sebastian looked at Quincy for help and he tried, really he did: “Seb’s just a bit loopy from lack of sleep, sir, but at least we got the business all straightened out, right? I’ll just take-”

“Your loyalty is commendable, but if you think I’m not hearing this out, you are out of your mind,” Moriarty was smirking and shook his head, “YOU can go pick up some food while Mister Moran can explain what on earth makes him BLUSH… “

Quincy just sighed and said “Yes, sir,” and left.

Moriarty folded his hands politely and waited…

“Err… it's personal sir?”

“Since apparently your ‘type’ has gotten mixed up in your work…” Moriarty started and then tilted his head and chuckled, “All right it's personal- I’m not going to harass you over it, but it HAS impacted your work…”

“I got my job done?” Sebastian offered hesitantly.

Moriarty put on that polite customer service smile and waited.

Sebastian folded. “Yes, sir, but may i say in my defense that it has not impacted my ability to work for you, and it didn't interfere with getting my job done this time- just caused some confusion…”

“Indeed, and i dislike confusion unless *I* cause it. So you have a type? And this Roxie fits it… that could be important to know if someone of that type was involved with a job.”

Sebastian winced.

Moriarty raised an eyebrow, “Someone of that type HAS been involved in a job?” He sounded puzzled, “i definitely don't recall anyone-”

“You, sir.”

Moriarty actually opened and closed his mouth. Then cautiously cleared his throat, “Can you...expand on that slightly?”

Sebastian looked anywhere but at the man. “Quincy pointed out that… ah...sir if i may say i am well aware that you do NOT have any interest that way and as stated it has never impacted my work…”

Moriarty got up and walked over to the side table and got down a bottle. “I believe you drink, Moran?”

“Religiously.”

Moriarty stood there facing away and took a fairly long time pouring drinks- _probably trying not to laugh at me_. Eventually he came back and put a drink down in front of Sebastian and sat down with his own. 

“You… have been interested… in me…? I have to admit i never noticed.”

“I’m… well aware of the fact that it wasn't going anywhere sir,” Sebastian did his best to talk into the drink.

“And…. this… has to do with… drag performers?” Moriarty’s voice went up rather a bit on that last.

Sebastian winced and shrank further into the chair- and the drink. “I hadn't really seen the similarity until recently… it's… mostly the charisma, but a bit of the smile… and the eyes.”

Moriarty spun his chair away and Sebastian braced for the worst.

The silence was… well he’d heard silence described as ‘deafening’ before and thought it was silly, but this silence certainly was very loud.

“As stated, sir, it has not interfered with-”

“Quite.” Moriarty cut in- all Sebastian could see was the back of his head over the chair-. “it has not interfered with business and that’s the important thing.” After a slight pause, “NOT that my employees’ personal proclivities normally matter to me, but until recently i had been of the impression you were straight, so…”

“Oh? Ah… no, sir. Bi i suppose? I mean… I don't think I usually… i tend to be more attracted to personality, and sex is … well, sex is fun anyway…” Sebastian realized he was babbling again and tried to change the subject, “In any event i apologize for the clothes- Quincy got me up and i just threw on what i had handy and i know it bothers you, but-”

Moriarty turned the chair back around and looked him up and down, “What’s wrong with your clothing?”

Sebastian blinked several times, “you hate this outfit?”

He raised an eyebrow, “I do?”

“You … insisted I go home and change every time I've been in casuals and you frowned at me when I showed up in my leather…”

Quincy walked in cautiously with some take out bags as Sebastian was speaking, “We’re on about clothes… Uh, I did rather drag him in fast, sir- he wanted to go back and change once he woke up a bit, so I’ll take some of that responsibility....”

Moriarty gave them both a very odd look and sipped his drink. “I don’t MIND your outfit; I just thought it was… inappropriate for the specific situation.” he looked him up and down with a faint smile, “You are one of the few people who can wear that kind of outfit without looking disheveled… but it's inappropriate for most jobs.”

“...oh.”

He had Quincy set up the food. “This is unfortunately going to be a bit awkward given recent conversations…” Moriarty twirled a fork in between his fingers.

“As i said, sir, it hasn’t interfered with my-”

“ I was planning- before the recent misunderstanding- on asking you if you would consider taking over the duties of live-in bodyguard since Neal is no longer on that duty.”

Sebastian dropped his fork. In trying to pick it up he knocked over the tray table and only Quincy’s fast reflexes kept the food from toppling over.

“Smooth…” Quincy muttered at him, and then addressed Moriarty, “I’m sure he’d be a very good choice, sir, just at the moment he’s a bit…. Ah… jet lagged and sleep deprived.”

Moriarty seemed to be stifling laughter, but after clearing his throat quite a bit said, “yes… well… obviously everyone is tired… Let’s revisit this discussion after everyone has recovered a bit, shall we?”

Sebastian hurriedly agreed and let Quincy do most of the talking for the rest of the meal. Moriarty doing his usual impossible thing of carrying on a conversation, while texting or emailing on business, AND managing to eat dinner. Sebastian mostly tried to not get food all over his shirt.

As they were leaving Moriarty stopped them: “And get that phone replaced before anything else!”

“Yes, sir, sorry sir…” Sebastian felt like kicking himself because he’d been planning on just going home and falling over.

Moriarty shook his head and smiled, “While it certainly complicated things, Moran, I do understand...I wrecked a phone once myself- for similar reasons: blasted thing woke me up after I finally got to sleep.”

Sebastian relaxed a bit again and ducked his head, “Thank you sir… i … didn't really understand it was my phone- it was just a thing making noise…”

Moriarty chuckled and shook his head and waved them out.

Quincy got them into a car, “well… that could certainly have gone worse.”

“I know that's true, Quince, but-”

“That live-in bodyguard job sounds like it's still on offer,” he pointed out, “You already got into the core team fast- you don't get more trusted than the live-in job.”

“I just hope the whole ‘hung up on him’ thing.... I just hope it doesn't get awkward- stay awkward.”

“... did you actually fess up about being interested in the boss?!”

Sebastian sank further into the seat, “he just looked at me and I collapsed like a cheap military cot.”

Quincy sighed, “Seb… it’s a good thing you’re pretty and shoot like God made you with a rifle in hand, because otherwise you would be SO dead.”

This being a conversation that had been had more than once Sebastian couldn't help the grumbled retort, “yeah, yeah, i know, i know, and I’m lucky as hell and-”

“Lucky doesn't begin to cover it,” Quincy snorted, “I’m convinced Lady Luck keeps you as her own personal boy-toy.”

Sebastian grinned at that, “well, she sure did me a few favors getting to the show…”

…

While they were waiting to get the phone replaced Quincy asked him about the show- partly to keep him awake- and listened patiently as Sebastian raved about it.

“You gave her... a what?”

“A lavalier- you know like in the Roxie Hart song?” Sebastian tried to sing, “And i’ll appear in a lavalier that goes all the way down-”

Quincy put a hand up, “For the love of all that's Holy, do NOT try to sing in that register.” he shrugged, “Ok… it's a fancy necklace? Wait… how much did it cost you?”

“... not that much: i found it in an antique store… it was …. Authentic to the time period…”

Quincy sighed, “You spent THAT much?”

“It was a good price for what it was…”

“And all you got out of it was a lipstick smudge? Not even a lapdance?!”

“Quincy!” Sebastian frowned at him, “first of all, it doesn't cost nearly that much to get a lap dance- secondly i don't think she normally even touches the audience; i mean she doesn't even sign autographs in person!”

“You need a girlfriend, man, or a boyfriend, or at least a night out with a pro: i think you’ve been seeing your hand too long.”

Sebastian just raised an eyebrow at him, “Since when can i not get a date- or three- when i want one?”

“Then go GET one, because seriously you’re all hung up on… unavailable people…” Quincy frowned, “that's it, isn't it: it's BECAUSE they’re unavailable..”

“You are not a therapist, Quince and… i don't think so? I mean I didn't know Roxie wasn't available until I went down to get her autograph…” he considered and had to see at least a potential point, “You think it's the hard to get thing?”

“I think i should find out who’s cleared in the working girls and you should go… relax.” Quincy nodded, “You aren’t that picky, it should be easy enough to find someone you like, even in the cleared people.”

“If i was paying for the privilege i would be a damn sight choosier, man…” Sebastian tried to continue the argument and just yawned.

Luckily his phone was ready and they could leave.

“I’m TIRED, Quincy,” Sebastian reminded him. “I’ve barely slept in days, and waking up to that kind of adrenaline? Can we talk after I wake up… like next week?”

Quincy drove him home and dropped him off. He staggered up the stairs and back into his flat and two guys tried to jump him so he killed them.

The adrenaline only barely woke him up by that point and he stood there stupidly staring at the two of them before realizing that armed killers in his home was… probably not an accident.

He called Quincy, “Sorry to bug you.”

“Forgot something?”

“Uh.. no, but … there’s these two dead guys and-” Sebastian yawned.

“What? Wait, two dead guys?! Where?!”

“Well they weren’t dead when they jumped me?” Sebastian yawned again and slid down the wall to sit on the floor. “Look, man, I’m too tired for this… can you come over and… figure this out?”

It took a surprising amount of time for Quincy to get back. Sebastian woke up enough to make sure that was Quincy coming in- _Oh, he brought back up: good._

“Holy FUCK, man! What did they want?!”

“I dunno?” Sebastian answered as he got himself up and started staggering toward the bedroom, “They jumped me, I killed them… I didn't think to ask until after… can you…. Figure it out? I just need to go to bed… I’m only still out here because I had to make sure it was you coming in.”

Franklin was staring at the two bodies and then looked over at him, “Moran… you CANNOT sleep here: it's compromised.”

“Watch me.”

…

Bastard wouldn't let him go to sleep and dragged him out to a car while Quincy and the clean up team packed up his flat- Sebastian dragged his jacket over his head and slept in the car.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fvjpE_wFL5A I'm So Tired - Lauv & Troye Sivan  
> no better chapter summary than the song:  
> I'm so tired of love songs, tired of love songs (someone take me home)  
> Tired of love songs, tired of love  
> Just wanna go home, wanna go home ('cause I can't be alone)  
> Wanna go home, whoa


	6. Long Gone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sebastian always did like a challenge.
> 
> (This chapter has an extensive passage of (not detailed) time while Sebastian is dealing with assignments. This is marked by ... as a line break)

When Sebastian woke up in a strange bed he was a bit confused: he’d woken up in strange beds before, but it was usually with a hangover and there was a girl in the bed…

He frowned and patted the bed thoughtfully: _ no, no warm spot of someone leaving… _

He sat up experimentally and realized a bathroom was a very urgent priority… luckily its location was obvious.

He did not know this bathroom.

He was not hungover, either.

He walked back into the bedroom to find a majority of his clothing in the closet or drawers, a few boxes of his belongings…

_ Oooh, right… guys jumped me and… Quincy packed up my stuff? Because I had to… move? _

While he was still puzzling over the situation the door opened to a rather bemused looking Moriarty.

“You sleep like a dead man, Moran.”

“Err, when i’m that tired? Yes sir- wake up fast if i think there’s a threat...uh...where am i?”

“This is the flat next to one of mine: It’s usually used as something of a guard’s shack, but it was empty and had bed linens so…”

Not being able to come up with anything else to say to his very hot boss while Sebastian stood there in his underwear he settled for , “yes, sir. Uh...any… idea who those guys were? Or why?”

“A few theories,” he shrugged, “Get dressed: meeting in half an hour or less.”

“Are… you said you didn't mind my casuals?”

Moriarty looked him up and down slowly- Sebastian had never felt so naked in his life, even naked!- “I think _this_ look is a bit more casual than would be acceptable for a MEETING, Moran…”

“Ah, err… i just…” he cursed his inability to sound competent, much less sauve, around the Boss. He finally asked, “Jeans, casual slacks, or suit, sir?” and hoped he didn't sound too pathetic.

Moriarty smirked at him and said, “Slacks would probably be a good choice, a few of the people at the meeting might be distracted if you were in jeans,” and he left.

Sebastian rushed through a quick clean up and got dressed and was making some coffee when his tactical analysis finally hit him with a bat and forced him to pay attention...

_ Wait…Wait… something important… the boss said his jeans might distract people...i always thought i looked good in jeans and my leathers… Boss… thought i looked … distracting? In them? _

Sebastian forced himself to face the fact that Moriarty hadn’t said HE found it distracting… but he apparently didn't actually dislike the look, and…

_ He had said I didn't look disheveled in it? _

Feeling MUCH better about things, Sebastian grabbed a mug of coffee and went to this meeting.

...

About half the core team was there, and a few more besides, so Sebastian got to see some of Moriarty’s other people- people who had been with him long enough, and through enough shit, that they looked at Quincy as the ‘new guy’.... Ouch.

Then the Boss pointed out that the men in his flat looked like intelligence operatives, and that they probably traced him to his home by following him, or running an identification check.

“Careless.” one of the men he didn't know said it flatly, and damned if Sebastian didn't feel horrible over it.

“Yes,” Sebastian took a deep breath, “Yes it was: i didn't anticipate anyone following me from … a non-work situation. I should have maintained better security awareness even off duty.”

That got him a nod of approval from one of the other men, and a slow nod from Franklin. Quincy tried to jump in to his defense but Sebastian put a hand out and stopped him…

“Quincy...I’m just… not really used to this, and I messed up.” he looked back at Moriarty, “I’m used to military - or even paramilitary- actions being rather notably out of the country, and London being ‘off duty’. I treated London like it wasn’t potentially enemy territory: sorry, sir, it won’t happen again.”

Moriarty actually quirked a very small smile. “Good.”

“Do we… have any idea why they were after me?”

“THAT is the million dollar question, Moran: no we don’t.” he adjusted his cuffs and looked off at nothing much- everyone waited.

Eventually he continued, “I have some… privileged information that says they might have been hunting for you unconnected with my operations… not directly connected anyway…” he sat up, “but of course we cannot count on it. As it happens i have several EXTREMELY delicate operations out of the country… and your contacts and resources have already proven to be very useful on assignment.”

“Yes, sir?”

“I’m afraid you won't get to any shows in town for a while, but this isn't just ‘make work’,” he looked at him very coolly, “This is very serious, VERY critical, and, frankly, very risky work: it will call for a lot of personal discretion in how to achieve the objectives… but given your recent accomplishments i think you can handle it.”

Sebastian read the underlying contract in the man’s words: do well and he was moved up to the highest levels in the organization; fail and it wouldn't matter because he’d be dead.

Sebastian couldn't help the smile, “You know me so WELL, sir: is it Christmas or my birthday?”

Moriarty flashed a grin that took his breath away, “I did rather think that was your idea of a good time, Moran.”

“I’ve… Always been attracted to danger, sir.”

Quincy just muttered, “you can say that again.”

And then he was taken out to be briefed on his new assignment- and to avoid hearing any of the London assignments being handed out or discussed.

...

The few days before he left the country were horrible- he wasn't allowed out to so much as catch a breath of fresh air- but soon enough he was being shuttled from boat, to train, to plane… doubling back and taking the most indirect routes…

To go back to a region he knew… well… better than he knew London these days.

...

Some of the work was intelligence gathering, and Sebastian expected most of Moriarty’s people would have had to spend a lot of time establishing the contacts and learning the languages- Sebastian just called some old friends and gambling buddies and had them introduce him around.

Some of the work was wet work, and occasionally his orders had specifics- target had to die in this way, or at exactly this time, or something- and that made it one kind of challenge, but sometimes? Sometimes it was a message from the boss: “Quick and quiet” usually, but occasionally? “make it interesting.”

Sebastian did his best to oblige on the ‘interesting’ ones…

He got a personal note once from the boss commending him on his artistic sense.

...he mailed that to Quincy with a request to keep it safe until he could get it framed.

…

…

...

It was all going well until he got contacted with one of the emergency codes- the one that told him to check an online posting for new orders…

And that said to come home immediately. Just the terse recall codes, no personal notes.

It was first class transport- under false identities- until he got close to England at which point he was being smuggled in- and fast.

The whole way Sebastian wondered if he’d messed up something? He didn't think he had… but when he was met at the safe house by Quincy looking grim…

“What did i do? Hell, what could i have done?!” Sebastian dragged his hand through his hair- which was getting too long again- “Every assignments been-”

Quincy finally got a word in, “SEB! Stop… it's not you.”

A tightness in his chest eased just a bit, “Oh… good… then what’s wrong?”

“Boss got picked up and that activated the failsafes.”

“What?!”

Quincy waved him to sit down, “The boss got grabbed- we’ve been trying everything to find out where he is… what happened…”

"How could anyone grab the Boss?!"

"Heavily armed pros who apparently knew where he was going to be and boxed him in.”.

“How could anyone know where…” Sebastian trailed off, “we have a leak.”

“We have to assume so,” Quincy answered and gave him a meaningful look, “and guess what, Seb: Lady Luck not only kissed you, she gave you a blow job, because you being not only NOT aware of where the boss was, but completely out of the loop for more than a year? You’re cleared.”

Sebastian looked over at a few faces looking on from the next room, “Oh… who… who’s running things?”

“I am, for right now,” One of the old hands- Seb had never gotten his name- said. “I’m Tiernan, this is Rohaan,” he indicated another fellow Seb had never seen before, “We’ve… tentatively cleared Quincy, and Franklin.”

“What about the rest of the fellows?” Sebastian looked around expecting Neal or Donald or Harris to be about…”And where IS Franklin?”

“Franklin is off playing front man to a few of the people we don't know if we can trust- they already know he speaks for the boss sometimes.”

Quincy’s voice was in familiar tones from too many battlefield reports, “Donald’s dead- he was killed when they grabbed the boss: according to Neal he didn't follow protocol and put up too much of a fight for a kidnapping and… they shot him. Neal was the other fellow on duty, along with a driver- as per protocol they are considered compromised since they could be the leak, and in any event the people who grabbed the boss saw them.”

“... right…” Sebastian’s head spun a bit, “Harris?”

“We don’t THINK he is a spy, but… he was the only other one who knew the schedule that day: we have to…” Quincy trailed off.

“Have to assume the worst, right.” Sebastian took a deep breath and forced himself into his working mindset, “Alright, the Boss had failsafes? Then we need to get those going because that's his leverage to get OUT if he’s still alive.”

“Precisely,” Rohaan nodded, “If he is still alive that's the pressure to get him busted out- if not? Then it's payback.”

“You needed a sniper I assume.”

“We need to follow his failsafe cascade, in order: some of these are...difficult.” Tiernan waved a printout.

Sebastian held out his hand and got handed a list of three… “Holy FUCK!”

Tiernan nodded, “This is just the next three- the cascade started 24 hours after he was taken… it's an automated program: it spits out the next things… and… i think it's also sending emails to people…”

Sebastian stared at the list for a moment and then nodded, “Boss wants it done, Boss gets it done…”

Tiernan looked at him very seriously, “You can manage this?”

Sebastian grinned just a little, “A clean kill of the concierge at some posh club is easy; the head of computer security for the Bank of England, and make it look like an accident? That's a bit harder...but i do like a challenge…”

“Now tell me who this Sherlock Holmes fellow is that has SIS security I’m supposed to start picking off?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the second story in this series: Killer Style ( https://archiveofourown.org/works/24582334 ) takes place during Sebastian's time out of the country.


	7. Deadlines

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sebastian Moran watched too many Dr. Phibes movies (non graphic but canon typical murders)

The one that had to look like natural causes or an accident wasn't really Sebastian’s strong point- although he did discuss options with people. Mister computer security ended up in a non-lethal car accident, but after the poor guy got sent home he complained bitterly about continued dizziness- after effects of concussion apparently. Two days later he ‘accidentally’ fell down a flight of stairs…

Meanwhile, Sebastian took care of the ‘clean kill on the concierge’ himself, because the security on that club was beyond belief. The Diogenes Club looked ordinary enough at the entrance, but… well, it likely wouldn't have been on the failsafe cascade if important people didn't belong to it. Sebastian set himself a challenge and beat his old distance record from the sandbox picking him off. His partner and windage spotter was gone before the body hit the floor, but Sebastian couldn't help watching for just an extra second to see the man die even as he held the door for some stodgy old man and a dapper fellow in a three piece.

Sebastian then started hunting SIS men.

The Boss’ instructions said not to put a scratch on this Holmes fellow- and if at all possible don't involve him at all- and Sebastian understood all too well the importance of leverage in getting someone released: ratcheting up the fear a bit in whoever was holding the boss was the goal of this, which meant making it impressive, and terrifying.

Scare them into giving the boss back, basically- Sebastian refused to believe he was dead already.

There was an outer perimeter of guards on the man- people at a distance keeping a general eye on things- and a closer detail. They all appeared very frustrated with the target’s tendency to go running about: Holmes was apparently some kind of adjunct to the police and had no clue about his own personal security… Of course that's likely why someone had assigned security to him: he was important to someone or some agency and unable to be kept in a secure lock down.

The obvious thing to do was to start by picking off the outer perimeter…

Sebastian thought about Moriarty being hurt and bared his teeth… he picked one of the inner perimeter men instead and stalked him until he went off shift…

A flash of a knife, and a deft lift of his wallet and sidearm, and he was just another mugging victim- pity.

The next day Sebastian saw an opportunity- one of those once in a lifetime gifts that Lady Luck gave him a bit more frequently than most people- and he just bumped the man at the right time and kept walking even as he heard the police car brakes… one of the other fellows later told him the guy would live, but he would be off duty for a few weeks to months,

But fifteen minutes after the unfortunate ‘accident’ with the police car, Sebastian used the first security guard’s stolen firearm to add one more shot fired to the mess that had Sherlock Holmes and half the MET hiding behind police cars… Pity about that third security guard ‘dying by mishap’ during the shootout: they might eventually decide it was friendly fire, but…

After that it got a lot harder. 

Whoever was handling the security put a lot more work into it, and Moriarty’s more computer savvy people reported an increase in surveillance and for that matter more cameras being installed! So it was obvious why getting rid of this guy’s security would put pressure on the Boss’ release… Sebastian decided that just picking them off wasn't good enough- he needed to make it artistic.

...and that's when it devolved into an argument...

Rohaan was rubbing his head and muttering something about the boss when Franklin tried once again to convince Sebastian to just shoot them: “Look, the orders say to pick them off, not play with them!”

Sebastian simply crossed his arms and sat back in the chair, “can any of YOU get to them? No? Then let me handle it.”

Tiernan was nattering on about something- Sebastian had stopped listening- when Rohaan stood up abruptly, “Let him play it his way.”

Sebastian was, frankly, startled. “...what?”

“The boss loves the show, the drama… it will make it even more clear that it's his failsafes if it's… showy… and he liked some of Moran’s work… I say let him play it his way.” Rohaan then cut everyone off and continued, “BUT it increases the risk that Moran gets picked up, so we go to secure contacts only and assume he could get taken down or picked up at any time.”

Sebastian nodded, “Sensible.”

He got handed access to a frightening amount of cash, and a few weapons caches and turned loose.

…

The first three had been the kind of work that was bread and butter for an assassin: neat and fast and untraceable.

But SOMEONE- probably very highly placed in intelligence- had taken Moriarty alive, which meant that they were trying to get information, which meant this failsafe cascade was the only leverage he had to getting set loose, or even surviving.

Sebastian wasn’t content with ‘neatly following orders’ on this: as he’d told everyone else, this called for drama, for art, for sending a MESSAGE…

The enemy had upped security- both on Sherlock Holmes and on the security itself- and Sebastian could only hope he got to see some of the reaction this would cause…it was almost a pity they would slap the secrets’ act all over it, because this was going to be a bloody obvious message.

He took the security guard that was on detail behind the flat Holmes lived in, overnight- quick and quiet and technically not dead yet... He left their cooling body in a watery ditch right outside what he figured had to be Sherlock Holmes’ parents' house- If the identity look up hadn't told him it was the right house he would have known anyway because the security there was tight too. He didn't dare be there to witness the reaction when the son’s security guard was found lying dead in a pool of bloody water at the parents’ house- but it was probably epic…

The next one he took down with a garrote when they fell just a little too far behind chasing after the detective. It was hard work to get his body into the frog pond at the park, but he managed. He wondered if they’d figured out the pattern yet- might not.

He really was stumped for how to manage a death by lice. He considered leaving the guy in a homeless encampment, but it seemed… lacking in style.

“What would Moriarty do,” Sebastian muttered and then pictured the man’s reaction to anything as banal as leaving him in lice ridden clothes.

 _“Really, Sebastian?”_ he pictured Moriarty sniffing, _“Couldn’t you manage giving him Typhus at least?”_

“That's IT!” 

He couldn’t actually kill the man with Typhus, but when they found his body in the infectious disease specialist’s office of St. Barts Hospital- where the Detective worked so often- they would have to quarantine and disinfect the whole place because of the broken vial of disease samples….

The next one was almost too easy: he’d heard some scholars saying it wasn’t ‘flies’ it was bees… and it was a pretty easy thing to get the right perfumy stuff to attract bees- it didn't smell like much to humans, but it was the stuff beekeepers used to pull stunts like having a bee beard… Anyway he just doped up a sprinkler full of it and set it off at the security detail- wouldn't you know a truck carrying bees had just had an accident down the road?

That Detective almost got himself hurt even though he should have been clear because he came BACK to get in the way! At least the guy seemed to have some idea of bee safety and kept yelling at the guards to stop running around screaming and hold still…

THEY were panicking over the swarms of bees.

One of them tried to SHOOT into the mass of them!

Sebastian reluctantly had to leave but DAMN that was hard to walk away from - at least that one couldn't be all covered up and not only did it hit the papers, but that detective Holmes’ friend Watson wrote it up on his blog. Apparently Holmes managed to start a big smoky fire and got the bees settled enough to drag the SIS boys- and a couple of idiot bystanders- to safety. According to Watson he got stung a couple times but didn't seem to mind… That entire team of SIS boys was out of action for a while, though, and two of them were in very bad shape in the hospital- allergies.

Sebastian had plans for the plague of livestock but it wasn't needed: he got contacted to help pick up the Boss in the city- they’d had to let him go!

This was actually the tricky part.

Obviously if they let him go and managed to identify his agents and pick him- and them- back up? It could be a disaster.

The top men had all agreed they couldn't risk giving away any more of their people, and Neal was suspect- even if Sebastian didn't think he would do anything deliberately they HAD seen him- so they told Neal to take him to a busy garage and he’d get picked up by a taxi.  
That would start the arduous task of shuffling the boss around losing any possible tail…

Sebastian called Rohaan and changed the plan.

They arranged for one of the men that ‘kind of’ looked like the boss to be picked up instead, leaving the boss to wait… until Sebastian drove up on his motorcycle with Quincy in a dark helmet and workman’s jumpsuit on the back.

Moriarty looked like hell, but Sebastian was relieved to see he was standing on his own, and his eyes were focused- whatever damage they’d done was mostly hidden by his clothes, unless you could read the pain lines in his face.

As he looked at Quincy jumping off the bike, the corners of his mouth curved up and he looked appreciative and nodded: He was slow getting out of his suit- and the suit hung on him in a way that was really awful to see- so Quincy and Sebastian had to help him get stripped and into the jumpsuit and helmet. Sebastian had to force himself to stay in mission mindset and not waste time cataloging the injuries.

“I assume it's a shielded suit?” Moriarty’s voice was rough.

“Yes, sir,” Sebastian said as Quincy helped him onto the back of the motorcycle, “Can you hold on?”

“I’ll manage, but don’t hit too many bumps.”

Sebastian nodded at Quincy and they took off. Quincy would arrange to scatter the clothes all over town while Sebastian was supposed to take the Boss to his doctor in London…

Supposed to.

Because as Quincy knew, Sebastian wasn’t trusting the boss to ANYONE else until they knew whether there was a leak.

…

Moriarty didn't waste his energy trying to talk on a motorcycle, but Sebastian could tell from the way his grip changed that he had noticed they weren’t heading anywhere they ‘should be’.

When he pulled into a small garage where one of his men had left the van, Moriarty was fumbling with the helmet straps.

“Here, sir,” Sebastian stepped up to help, “One of my friends will be picking up the-” Sebastian cut off in a bit of surprise as Moriarty somehow had Sebastian’s pistol.

“I believe i need to know where we are going, Moran.” The voice had a casual drawl only slightly spoiled by the rough voice and cough.

Sebastian put himself into parade rest and nodded, “Yes, sir, I understand… but… I would strongly prefer not to detail where we are going until we are… out of any observation range. I was going to put the cycle in the back of the van and get us moving… “

Moriarty’s hand wasn’t as steady as it should have been while he considered. “We SHOULD be heading to my personal physician.”

“Yes, sir.” Sebastian sighed, “We don't know who the leak was, or how bad it is… and… I don't believe you are injured beyond my capability to handle… “

Moriarty shook his head and then wobbled slightly and Sebastian reflexively came up and took his arm for support- luckily Moriarty didn't shoot him, just looked a bit exasperated.

“No sense of self preservation, Moran?”

“You wouldn't be the first to accuse me of it, sir… can we… have this discussion in the van?”

He looked like he was going to argue but eventually just shook his head, “whatever- as long as i can lie down.”

Sebastian got the bike strapped in, and got the Boss tucked in on the mattress pad next to the bike. “There’s a bottle of water and a bottle of electrolyte right there…”

“Already on it.” he muttered. “Oh, and none of our people could have leaked where i was going- they didn't know.”

“I know Neal said that… but…. Until they hear it from YOU the top folks didn't believe it- or not entirely.”

“Hmmm….” after a long pause as Sebastian drove them around and out of London, Moriarty mumbled, “When did you get back, anyway?”

“Just in time for the orders about that concierge, and that Holmes fellow’s security… it's been kind of fun- a challenge anyway.”

In a barely understandable voice Moriarty breathed, “You… ohhhh… of course it was you that took that shot… did you know he was there?”

“Did i know who was there?”

_Nothing._

He glanced back to see that the man had finally fallen asleep. Probably the first real rest he’d had since he’d been kidnapped.  
Moriaty didn't even wake up when Sebastian lifted him out of the van and carried him into the cottage. He made an unhappy noise- probably because of his ribs- as Sebastian settled him carefully into bed.

Sebastian relayed an assurance that all was well to Tiernan- who threatened to castrate him if he didn't return the Boss RIGHT NOW. _S_ _igh_. After a bit of consideration he texted the ‘cleared’ team and pointed out that even Quincy didn't know where he was, for security reasons, and that he would have the Boss call when he woke up- which might be a bit. He also suggested that they just put any remaining failsafes on hold until the Boss checked in.

Then he trashed THAT burner phone, left a new one with a note next to Moriarty’s bed, and started making sure they had enough supplies.

…

Moriarty didn't REALLY wake up for almost a day: he ‘woke up’ enough to have some soup and carry on a disjointed conversation that made Sebastian even MORE determined to hunt those bastards down, but he figured actual rest was probably the best thing for him, so…

…

“Moran?” Moriarty’s voice called out as he was in the kitchen.

“Be right there, sir!” Sebastian made sure everything was secure and went into the bedroom to find Moriarty- looking a LOT better for the rest- sitting up on the bed.

“Do you want to come into the kitchen and have some soup?”

Moriarty raised an eyebrow at him and looked around the room with an exaggerated perplexed expression. “Ah… this may sound like a very strange question, Moran, but… the FUCK are all these notes?”

Sebastian looked at the note on the phone, the note on the door, and a couple of other perfectly clear notes… “Uh… is your vision doing okay, sir?”

“My vision is fine: why are there notes all over this room?”

“Oh! I figured you weren’t really awake when i brought you in, and i tried to explain things when you had some broth, but i wanted to be sure you knew where you were and what was going on when you finally woke up…”

He nodded slowly, “Where are we? The note said no one else knows?”

“Well, not knowing what the risks were- leaks and traces and all- I took us to a friend’s cottage: he never uses it and i have blanket permission to stay here, but all he knows is i told him i was here for a bit- he doesn't know anyone else is. Even Quincy and Neal don’t know where i am right now.”

“So how do we get my doctor here?”

“Uh, do i know them?”

“I doubt it.”

“How about if I bring our unit medic? He doesn't work for us- heck, he still has a security clearance- but i trust him.”

One side of Moriarty’s mouth went up just a bit and he threw Sebastian’s words back at him, “do i know them?”

Sebastian chuckled and handed his reply back, “I doubt it.”

“We appear to be at an impasse, Moran.”

“Not really- you can call in and give orders about that failsafe cascade, and then you can have some soup and I’ll listen to your lungs…”

Moriarty stared at him for a while and then slowly shook his head, “I’m fine. I’ll just-” he tried to get up and grabbed for the head board of the bed. He had that familiar impassive look…

Sebastian carefully put an arm around him and under his elbow. “Can you walk, or do I need to carry you?”

He glared at Sebastian, “I walked out of there under my own power and got on your damn motorcycle, Moran!”

“Yeah, and the adrenaline has worn off, along with whatever they gave you to turn you loose, and i didn't know your allergies or what they gave you to give you anything else…”

He tried to insist he was fine and Sebastian just sighed. “Sir? I say this with the utmost respect, but you are being an idiot.”

“You have some fucking nerve- and a suicide wish!- to say that…”

“First of all, the way your arms are shaking and my estimation of your balance says I’m safe for at least another twenty-four hours before you can even get CLOSE to stabbing me…” Sebastian helped him walk out to the table and got him seated in the padded chair with the armrests and back support he’d draped a blanket over, “And i can say it because i have a fair idea of the condition you are in, and what you are actually capable of right now-”

“You have no idea what-”

“I’ve been there.” Sebastian didn't look at him, just put the soup in front of him and a spoon with a big cushioned grip. “Looks like they took a bit more care about permanent damage, though. So you get your soup, and call in and tell Tiernen and Rohaan and the rest of them that i haven’t done anything but be a stupid worrywart at you… you can even lie through your teeth and tell them you’re fine and I’m an idiot, but i warn you Quincy will know better… and then you can tell me who you want dead and how slowly, okay?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since a few folks didn't "get" it...in addition to the drama and dr phibes stuff, the underlying message of the 10 plagues theme was intended to be: "let my people go".


	8. Off the Grid

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Misunderstandings, recovery... and...he wasn't wrong.

Sebastian fussed with food and generally tried to give Moriarty some space, while staying close by in case he needed something: he mostly seemed to be watching him quietly and eating.

He had finished his soup, and a good bit of his tea, when he said, “I need a gun.”

“You mean in general or now?”

He stared at him for two beats and then raised an eyebrow, “Now.”

He seemed cogent enough so Sebastian took out one of his sidearms and put it down carefully next to his left hand- the boss fired leftie as far as he knew- “Its loaded, safety on, and that one has less range but less kick- if your hand or arm is shaking too much don’t go for finesse shots.” and then figuring he wanted to test out his grip and his arm strength with a bit of privacy he turned back to doing dishes.

“So you actually have zero sense of self preservation…?” a very puzzled sounding Moriarty said.

Sebastian turned to ask him what he meant and froze to find the boss aiming a pistol- remarkably steadily- at him. “Uh… is… there some reason you’d want to shoot me?”

Moriarty inhaled, rolled his eyes, and flipped the safety back on and put the gun down next to his plate. “No, i suppose not… did it occur to you that being kidnapped and held prisoner- admittedly quite comfortably by comparison- RIGHT after i got turned loose from being kidnapped and held prisoner… just MIGHT be a bit uncomfortable?”

Sebastian tried to come up with a response to that and ended up opening and closing his mouth- a lot. “I’m not holding you prisoner!” was all he finally managed to say.

Moriarty sagged slightly and rubbed his brow and muttered something unintelligible; then he pulled himself back upright. “I do not know where I am. You brought me here. You are controlling my access and who i can contact-”

“I left you a phone!” Sebastian protested.

“One of the few reasons I reacted calmly AT ALL… yes.” He took a deep breath and put on that plastic customer service smile again, “And you had previously stated you found me attractive, which could lead to some… issues with being held in an isolated cottage without backup or a weapon.”

Sebastian tried desperately to make sense of this. “I… the only reason i didn’t leave you a gun was that… waking up… after all this, you might try to hurt yourself- if you thought you were still a prisoner- or shoot anyone who moved… it… it happened a lot… i… i almost shot one of my buddies once because he woke me up…”

Moriarty pointed at the chair, “sit.”

Sebastian sat.

“I believe you. I believe you MOSTLY because there is no way you would hand me a loaded gun and turn your back if you had the SLIGHTEST idea that you were holding me against my will. That said? You have in fact rather effectively taken me prisoner- which makes me just a TOUCH aggravated.”

Sebastian put both his hands in plain view on the table, “It… never occurred to me, sir… and i would… when we had this discussion before i ended up out of the country… i made it clear i understood that-”

“People get really brilliant dumb ideas, Moran.” He sighed and waved a hand, “Do you have anything slightly more solid than soup?”

Sebastian gave him a list of what he had instantly to hand, “and we are not that far from a nice market. Uh… seriously i was just concerned about a security leak.”

Moriarty just shook his head- although he wasn't reaching for the gun or anything- “tell me where we are.”

Sebastian explained as best as he could- mostly ended up giving him directions. “It’s technically on my buddy’s estate, so it doesn't EXACTLY have an address although the local postmaster would know how to get the mail here…”

Moriarty whistled, “Ok, that's REALLY off grid.”

“I had no intention of-”

Moriarty held up a hand, “Ok, make up some food; i need to call a few people…”

“I can have you back to London in-”

Moriarty pointed at the kitchen.

Sebastian slunk off to make more food, and worried. It had never occurred to him that he might be viewed as kidnapping him again- not ….  _ Sigh, right- he doesn't know me that well… _

Sebastian made a point of catching his eye before walking in with more food and drink.

Moriarty was talking into the phone- it was on speaker. “- will reset the cascade for now, enter the code ONCE and then it's up to me again.”

Franklin’s voice, “Yes, sir. Anything else?”

“No, just get me that back up bag.” he hung up and looked at Sebastian, “You’ll need to go pick up my luggage and a few odds and ends- you can go shopping at the same time i assume?.”

“Err… yes? Uh… shopping, sir?”

“I’m staying here for a couple of days- you are correct that it's safer to lie low for a bit- so you’ll go meet one of the boys and get my luggage.”

“You…” Sebastian shook his head, “Right, i keep forgetting how fast things move around you… ok, you… you’re ok staying here? I honestly didn’t mean anything triggery…”

“I’m… a bit on edge, and likely will be for a while no matter where i am; staying off grid for enough time to rest and get my stomach settled is, however, an excellent idea.”

“I really am worried about pneumonia, but as long as you don’t get very sick I can manage.”

“If i get VERY sick or even look like i am heading that way, you WILL take me to my doctor,” He said it very firmly.

“Yes sir, of course.”

“In the meantime I’ll try to put together a shopping list, and… gah- there’s no internet here is there? The phone signal was horrible too.” he dragged a hand through his hair and looked appalled, “My hair feels like shit.”

“I can help you through a shower…?”

“Not until i get my shampoo and conditioner,” he sniffed. “Can you pick up some movies or something?”

“Sure…” Sebastian brightened up, “Do you like musicals? I can get a copy of Chicago…”

Moriarty just stared at him.

“You… uh… do or don’t?”

He put his hands up and scrubbed at his face, “Do i like musicals…” after a pause, “Yes,” he took a deep breath, winced faintly from taking that deep a breath and continued, “yes, i like musicals… one problem being that musicals tend to cause me to want to sing along or move- if they are any good- and i don’t think that's a great idea right now.”

“Oh, yeah… not a good idea- maybe later then. I just thought- I had never seen Chicago before… well, before i went to the bachelor party and saw Roxie at the club? I bought a copy of the musical after…”

“You hadn’t…” He blinked a lot, “Oh… so you… found out AFTERwards how much of a match the costume was?”

“Yes sir- i mean i thought it had to be from the source or it would have… Roxie would have had it made to look more femme? I saw the costume and actress in still pictures when I looked it up, and then I got the movie...it was exact as far as I could tell… but no, i hadn't seen Chicago before that…” he grinned, “Since then i’ve seen it a lot of times: you ask me Roxie did it better than the actress.”

Moriarty smiled, “A high compliment.” he stirred his tea thoughtfully, “I… ah… got you another autographed photo of Roxie- before Queen’s burned down- and i-”

Sebastian was listening in delight when ‘burned down’ processed. “Wait! What?! The… The drag club burned down?!”

Moriarty blinked at him and then looked taken aback, “You didn't know?”

“No!” 

“Oh… i thought one of the- one of your friends would have told you…”

Sebastian felt the shock hit him- he’d been busy, focused on recovering Moriarty- but he’d been planning a trip back to the club once he wasn't busy…

…“Moran?”

Sebastian shook himself and took a deep breath, “Sorry, sir, just… a bit unexpected… Was anyone hurt?”

“Not… i am informed a few cleaning folks had minor injuries and some firefighters, but the club was just setting up when the fire broke out and everyone made it out.”

“I’ll have to call Tony- see if he… if he knows where…”

“Uh… Tony? Anthony? The fellow-” Moriarty stopped and waited.

“Yeah,” Sebastian took a deep breath and tried to refocus on the current situation. “Well, not like i could go to a show until you are a bit better- umm… wow, sorry sir, no i had no idea.”

“I thought you knew or i would have been… well i wouldn't have dropped it on you like that.”

“Yeah… well… um…” Sebastian forced his mind back on current problems, “Make me up a shopping list- food, entertainment, and anything else- and I’ll head out.”

He got the boss a pad of paper and a pen and let him mull over a list while he set up easy food for while he was out, and double checked the security.

After a bit, “Other than the fact that my ability to function has gone to HELL…” he grumbled, “I’ve got a tentative list- probably forgot a few things.”

Sebastian sat down and went over it and they added a couple of items.

“When you get back i want to go over what you did with the failsafes- i got a few bits and pieces out of the interrogators but not enough,” he looked at Sebastian and grinned- very much like his old self which was a relief, “From what i heard you went above and beyond.”

“I was… well I ended up in a bit of an argument with the others- Rohaan finally said you would support a bit more drama and they cut me loose to do it the way I wanted.” Sebastian grinned back, “i look forward to bragging, honestly- haven't been able to brag about any of it yet, since we were running high security protocols- i don't even know where anyone else is.”

He got the boss settled in the big comfy chair with a phone, a good bit of drink and a gun nearby, reminded him of the walker he’d left which Moriarty looked at as though it was covered in shit- and then he went out.

…

The simple part was the groceries, getting to the meeting place for the boss’ bags without being seen was the time consuming part. He was met by Franklin, who handed him a suit bag, a large soft sided suitcase, a briefcase/satchel, and glared at him.

“You had BETTER be taking good care of him.”

Sebastian held a hand up, “I swear! Honest! I’m just really- i was worried about leaks and maybe them using his release to track back to take down the failsafes…”

Franklin sighed, “Yeah, i know: we’ve all gone dark and… anyway here:” he handed him a folded paper, “Updated contact information and drop relays...and…” Franklin looked very determined and grim, “You were right not to take him to his doctor.”

Sebastian froze, “Shit- they’re a leak?”

“I don’t think so, but there were some SIS folks just ‘hanging around’ a bit too close to their office- so i think someone either found out who they are, or… is staking out a lot of doctors.”

“Fuck.” Sebastian said with a great deal of sincerity, “I was hoping I was being too cautious.”

“Get going- I’ll be taking a good long time to get back to work, so use the other contacts.”

Sebastian made a point of taking an even longer and less obvious route back.

…

“Boss?” he called out carefully once he got back to the cottage: sure enough Moriarty had a gun aimed at him as he came in with the first load.

“Any trouble?” He put the gun down and didn’t sound upset or short of breath, thankfully.

“Not on my end- some issues with security… may i say sir; i am VERY sorry to have been right?”

He sat up, “report!”

He handed him the paper and told him what Franklin had said and watched him nod slowly. “My doctor would not be a leak- deliberately- but damn it Holmes may have figured out who they are…”

“The detective?”

“His brother,” Moriarty’s eyes lit up as Sebastian started unpacking the food onto the table, “THAT is chocolate.”

“Yes, sir, I remembered seeing this brand in your desk once when you were giving a briefing.” he broke a few pieces off and handed him some.

“... you are… surprisingly observant in the oddest ways…”

“Uh… yes? Sniper?”

“Never mind,” he popped a bit of chocolate in his mouth and an expression of pure bliss crossed his face, “Food of the Gods…”

Sebastian perked up, “Yeah, i remember when i finally heard the chemical name: Theobromine- i was on a bit of a kick to find out the Greek and Latin names for everything… Take it i picked up the right brand?”

He ran his tongue over his lips in a frankly distracting fashion, but Sebastian didn't get the impression it was deliberate- which made it worse. “I have a gun- you have more chocolate: i believe we understand each other?” Moriarty smirked.

Sebastian was incredibly relieved to be getting back to the usual teasing- at least it meant the boss was feeling more secure. “Oooh, i dunno…” he unwrapped the next bit…”i might be due for a raise…” and then he gave him the next piece. “More tea?”

“Yes, please: i didn't feel quite up to hot kettles.”

“Figured; why I left you the thermos.” Sebastian set up the tea, “His brother? The detective has a brother or?”

“Mycroft Holmes, code named Antarctica.” Moriarty said around a piece of chocolate.

“I figured he had to be related to someone important to warrant that kind of security,” Sebastian nodded, “it's why I took such trouble with the jobs on his security…”

“Details… also, how the HELL did you time the shot on the concierge for when Holmes was leaving?!”

Sebastian looked over his shoulder to see a rather avid look, “Wait… the brother was leaving the club? There were… two men, one much older- sort of stodgy- one a very dapper fellow, stylish, three piece suit with a pocketwatch-”

“That's the one.”

“That’s his brother?”

“Mmm-hmm! Secret head of intelligence in Britain, runs half of it at least…” he was eyeing the chocolate and the tea.

Sebastian put the tea out of reach, “wait for it to steep and cool a bit?”

He kept glancing at the tea like it would cool faster, but seemed mollified by another bit of chocolate. “From what i heard you took the concierge out right as he came out.”

“Yes. Coincidence I'm afraid, I had no idea. The only reason I even saw them was I stayed just a bit after I took the shot to be sure… at that range things can happen.”

Moriarty closed his eyes and smiled, “That must have been beautiful.”

“I thought so.”

“How far away were you?”

Sebastian gave him the distance and the location and watched his eyes widen. “That… that beats your record, doesn't it?!”

Sebastian all but purred, “yes, sir.”

“Damn… so… tell me about Sherly-lock’s guards? I didn't get much other than something scared the Iceman spitless…”

Sebastian pointed out the two layers, and his choice to go for the harder targets, the first one looking like a mugging… “Mostly I wanted his gun- when I started I was thinking of a quiet terror, you know: pick them off without a trace?”

“Yes?”

“So i got lucky and got to ‘bump’ the next one of them into the path of a police car: they weren’t killed but they were laid up.”

Moriarty nodded, “nice, hard to prove.”

“And i shot the third that same day with the stolen gun… the Detective was at a crime scene and there was gunfire- everyone under cover- so they would have a tough time calling it as a targeted hit…”

“Agreed, very nice- but that wouldn't scare Frosty… so what did you do?”

“After that was the argument: i wasn’t happy with the neat and quiet routine for this- if you needed leverage to get let out? Then… i felt it called for something a bit more dramatic…”

He nodded, “You could go either way- i prefer the dramatic, usually.”

“That's what Rohaan said, which is when they said to do it my way and they all went to higher security in case i got caught.”

“... AAAaaand?!”

Sebastian gave him his tea. “I always loved old cheesy horror movies- ever heard of Dr. Phibes?” 

Jim blinked and nodded slowly, “Supposedly killed everyone based on plagues? Except they did it wrong.”

“I decided to do a ten plagues themed set of hits,” Sebastian sipped his tea with a smile, “it was a challenge let me tell you. For the first- waters turned to blood- I took one of the overnight guards on the Detective’s flat and got him mostly alive up to the Holmes parents’ house…”

“..Whaaa?” Moriarty’s eyes were huge and dark and avid.

“Finished him off just outside the house and left him to bleed out in a water filled ditch, so the water turned to blood… also the security on the parents’ house was-” Sebastian grinned, “Oh! That would be the brother’s parents too: no wonder security was so hot.”

“You… killed Sherlock’s guard… at… his PARENT’S … and didn't get seen… Oh. My. GAWD, Moran, that is SO damn sexy I could kiss you!”


	9. The things we don’t know...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> people assume a lot. they assume information, they assume reasons... and sometimes people keep things to themselves when they shouldn't...  
> and this chapter is wall to wall with examples.

Sebastian didn’t get a kiss, but he did get an absolutely delighted expression when he told Moriarty about hauling the body to the frog pond- for plague of frogs- and the boss outright CACKLED over the body with the broken vial at St. Barts.

… Then the cackling caused a coughing fit and Sebastian got him a pillow to hold onto until it settled.

“Hmmm… how well do you tolerate spiciness? Particularly Asian spices?” Sebastian asked him thoughtfully.

“I TOLERATE most foods that I’m not allergic to…” Moriarty said thoughtfully, “But i don't like really hot stuff?”

Sebastian froze, “You didn't mention allergies when I went shopping?”

“Ah… right… i’m… used to being a bit secretive about allergies- too easy to kill someone that way…”

Sebastian sat back down and did his best to glare at him- although he was fairly certain he just looked as worried as he felt- “Ok, full allergy list immediately… and do i need an epi pen?”

… It was a short but alarming list, and he needed an epi pen.

Sebastian called Tobin right away and asked him to get an epi pen- off the books: he’d come get it.

Tobin started to ask… then: “Do i want to know?”

“Absolutely no you do not.”

“So i’m just going to pretend you told me you are dating someone and don’t want her to know you threw her epi pen out.”

“Sounds great, we’ll go with that…” he added, “and what kind of antibiotics can you give for, say, hypothetical pneumonia if the hypothetical girlfriend whose Epi-Pen i threw out is allergic to penicillin?”

Tobin swore at him and then gave him a list.

“Can i get that and the dosing instructions? Just in case my hypothetical girlfriend doesn't improve?”

“Fuck you, Colonel.” Tobin grumbled and then, “yeah… can it wait until tomorrow night or not?”

“It can wait for tomorrow night, thanks.” 

...

Once he hung up, Moriarty- perhaps a bit sheepishly, for him- asked, “so about this question of Asian spices?”

“I have a very nice soup recipe that is just a touch spicy, and works better than chicken soup.” Sebastian grumblingly added, “or penicillin…”

Moriarty ignored the grumble, but looked vaguely apologetic. “Not that i don’t appreciate the cooking, but I am already heartily sick of this soup you’ve been serving- its bland.” 

“Well Mister Moriarty-”

“Jim.”

“Uh… Jim?”

“We’re… look, i do try to keep some professional standards- unlike most criminals- but given we’re this off the grid, off the books, and… i’m supposed to be resting: call me Jim.” 

“And you’ll make sure I get the information I need to keep you safe while you are resting? And not accidentally poison you or anything?”

“...yes.”

“Then please call me Sebastian, and I'll get started on the ‘my mom’s recipe that cures everything’ soup- which luckily has nothing you are allergic to in it.”

“Your mom’s?”

“No, not my mom’s… i briefly dated a girl who… well, it didn't work out but we stayed friends- anyway HER mother apparently spent a lot of time somewhere near Thailand, i think? And came back with this soup recipe… it's good, and supposedly cures everything.”

He smiled faintly, “Does it? Cure everything?”

“Dunno, but it tastes good, clears your sinuses, and settles my nerves.” 

“The only time i’ve noticed you having nerves was talking about dating or something,” Jim was clearly aiming for a light teasing tone.

Sebastian took a deep breath, “yeah well...like i said, sir- Jim- I’ve been there: you probably don’t know, but … i was captured.” he waited for the response but mostly Jim just blinked a lot.

“That… explains some redacted records…” he hesitated and asked, “cooking… settled your nerves?”

“I had a lot of nightmares… and … well, needing something to do until they cleared me for duty again? When you get up at oh dark early and everything is closed… I started teaching myself to cook more.”

In an oh-so-casual voice he asked, “Did it help?”

“Yes, but you have to be really careful of the side effects.”

“Side effects? What side effects?”

“Weight gain, mostly- and an addiction to cooking shows.” Sebastian said with a straight face and then grinned.

Jim laughed- carefully holding on to the pillow and not hard enough to trigger a coughing fit- “Well… I lost some weight in the icebox, and I tried to keep my muscle tone but I lost a lot of that too… so i could stand to put some weight back on… and…” he looked Sebastian up and down and then smiled slightly, “Maybe you can teach me what you do to keep that physique of yours.”

Sebastian preened a bit at that. He got started on the soup, and eventually Jim made him finish telling him about the plagues…

“-So these security guards who are supposedly OH-So-professional start SHOOTING at the bees-”

He had to stop three times to let Jim breathe.

…

The soup helped: even Jim was impressed with how well it helped him clear all the gunk out of his system. Of course keeping him warm, making sure he moved a lot and walked, and got sleep… and all those other things helped a lot TOO, but Sebastian honestly believed the soup did a lot- Jim agreed. Sebastian taught him the recipe and ended up sharing some of his other favorite recipes and getting him hooked on a few cooking shows.

...

Jim had a few nightmares- which he refused to acknowledge, but Sebastian knew how that was- and his muscle tone and lungs seemed to be recovering fast, although Sebastian had to keep telling him not to overdo it..

“I’m always tired,” Jim grumbled.

“They put you through high stress and your body is telling you to take it easy and recover.”

Jim just gave him this ‘are you an idiot’ look…

“Yeah, I know: i never listened either.” Sebastian put on another cooking show: it was the only kind of show they both found at least tolerably interesting, and didn't get them yelling at the television-any show with guns or knives had both of them ranting about safety and technique in moments- and Jim refused to watch Chicago until he wasn't out of breath..

After just a couple more days Jim insisted he had to get back to work.

“Ok, can you at least pretend to listen while I lecture you on taking care of yourself?”

He put on a very obviously sarcastic face.

“Yeah… that's about the look i gave my doctor, i guess…” Sebastian sighed and went over symptoms requiring a doctor, and the importance of rest and nutrition, and not counting on his body- or anything- being up to high demands for a bit.

Jim raised an eyebrow, “Well, just remember that you only get to lecture me like that in private- in public i don’t put up with it.”

Sebastian tried to stay casual as he asked, “You’re keeping me around?”

“Well, this was a hell of an audition for personal bodyguard…”

“Wasn’t sure if you were going to keep that offer on the table, or have me deported back out to remote work…”

“I’m cranky and a bit crazy, not stupid.”

Heh. Sebastian stuck out a hand, “well, Mister Moriarty… then i would be delighted to be one of your personal bodyguards.” they shook on it and then Sebastian asked, “How casual can i be in front of… well, the fellows who were cleared?”

“Try to keep it to ‘that’s not advisable’ instead of ‘you’re being an idiot’.” Jim shrugged, “Some of them I’m closer to than others… I’ll fill you in as we go.” Jim inhaled deeply and coughed a little, “I am so looking forward to being able to at least watch a musical without running the risk of setting off my ribs again…”

“We can celebrate your return to good health with Chicago?”

Jim gave him an odd look, “Are you THAT hung up on it because of Roxie?”

“Well… i mean i only watched it because of Roxie so i guess?”

“Didn’t you like any other musicals? I mean not that Chicago is a bad favorite but it's the only one you talk about…”

“I.. ah… I don’t actually know any other musicals?” Sebastian admitted.

Jim stared at him.

Jim practically squeeked, “NONE?!”

“Uh, no?”

“Carousel?”

“Is… I guess that's a musical?”

“Les Mis?”

“Uh… what?”

Jim stared at him. “Ok, an easy one: Rocky Horror…”

“Oh! I’ve heard of that one- even saw a few images from it… I didn’t know it was a musical, though.”

Jim opened and closed his mouth. “Cabaret, you HAVE to have seen Cabaret?”

“Since i don't know the title, other than what a cabaret IS, no…”

He made gestures as though he was grasping for something. “Damn Yankees?” he whispered.

Sebastian shook his head.

“The Pirates of Penzance… surely you’ve seen that?!”

“Heard of it, never seen it.”

Jim was looking at him with a look of dumbfounded shock.

“I… liked Chicago…?” Sebastian offered hopefully, “So i’ll probably like some of those other ones…”

“New assignment, Moran.” And it was suddenly Moriarty again, not Jim.

Sebastian sat up, “yes, sir?”

“Familiarize yourself with the works of Bob Fosse and Steven Sondheim, and the complete performances of Judy Garland and Liza Minelli.”

"Wait… isn't… Judy Garland was… she was in the Wizard of Oz….”

He raised an eyebrow, “Which is a musical, yes.”

Very quietly Sebastian said, “oh… uh… I saw that? A long time ago…”

“Can you sing any of it? Do you remember any of the lines?”

“Err… no? And… um…’That’s a horse of a different color’?... yeah, and… ‘follow the yellow brick road’...”

He pinched the bridge of his nose and then squared his shoulders and looked VERY firmly at him. “If YOU haven't seen ANY of these, i may need to provide a required watching list to my top people… i simply CANNOT have close guards and team members who miss all of my references…”

...

When Sebastian “returned” the boss to a very high security meeting any attempts at “professional” went out the window. Rohaan fussed at him so much you would have thought they were related- which Sebastian had to assume they were not given the different ethnicities. Tiernan tried to hide the fact that he was asking if Sebastian needed to be shot or anything and was surreptitiously fretting almost as badly. Franklin just looked like he finally had a weight pulled off him and about collapsed into a chair. Most of the other high clearance folks were either not there for security reasons- like neal- or were on guard detail- like Harris.

Quincy walked up and punched Sebastian gently- for him- in the arm.

“Ow! What’s that for?” Sebastian rubbed his arm.

“Everyone has been worried over how the boss is doing and you being the only contact point, so naturally they all took it out on me.”

“Right.” Sebastian sighed, “Sorry man.”

Jim managed to shake off the tag team worrying and got to a desk and sat down. “Gentlemen… I assume I will be briefed as to where everyone else is, but first things first: Sebastian is being moved to my personal bodyguard detail- effective immediately, or rather about when he picked me up and stashed me off grid.”

Franklin rather wearily said, “yes, sir… and as far as we can tell several doctors were being watched, as were a few of your lower security holdings… and a couple of the higher security ones… we haven't identified the leaks.”

“Probably aren't any- or not any deliberate ones: remember our dealings with some of those code name folks from the Secret Intelligence Services?”

“Yes, sir?” several people replied- not Sebastian obviously.

“One of them, Antarctica, is actually Sherlock Holmes big brother Mycroft Holmes.” he nodded with a tight smile at Sebastian, “Primary member of the Diogenes Club- which is why I had the concierge on the cascade.” his smile broadened alarmingly, “And why having his dear baby brother’s guards on the cascade was pressure. I really have to admire the elegance of leaving one of them at the parent’s house- I wish I had thought to order it- it scared him enough that I could see it easily…”

There were whistles and comments and eventually a few people asked if they should just shoot the man- one of them being Sebastian, whose trigger finger was definitely itching.

“No. First of all, i need to find out EXACTLY what strings he is pulling before i start cutting them- don’t want any unexpected problems- and secondly? He was directly responsible for most of this, and he isn’t getting off THAT easily…”


	10. Ace, King, and Queen, in the Hole

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> gambling- cards and life
> 
> i do have a bit of a migraine so please forgive any typos

Jim shifted around his work in ways that probably made sense in some greater order of things. Sebastian alternated between being on bodyguard detail for Jim- usually in or near London, but he did occasionally travel- and being shipped off to do the kind of work that took advantage of his skills…

Sebastian suspected at first that he was just getting shipped off when his pleas to be allowed to “at least WING him?” about Mycroft Holmes got a bit too aggravating.

...but he was starting to worry that maybe he was being shipped off for other reasons too.

He came back to London after an assignment to find Quincy, Murphy and Harris setting up a card game.

“Deal me in!” 

“With all due respect,” Quincy never even looked up, “YOU are a card shark.”

Murphy snorted, “with no respect at all, Colonel; you cheat!”

Harris raised an eyebrow and didn't say anything.

“Of COURSE I cheat!” Sebastian protested, “It’s the only way to level the field: every cardplayer in the unit cheated!”

“Do they now?” Harris said quietly, “Good thing we were only going to play for pretzels.”

Quincy sighed, “Yeah, we all cheat- or can- it got to be a challenge: who can cheat better?”

“Me, obviously.” Sebastian snorted.

Harris looked up and slowly took out his wallet. He pulled out a rather large amount of cash… “In that case, gentlemen: ante up- i was trying to not take advantage…”

All three of them took that as a challenge.

By the time Moriarty came in Quincy had dropped out, Sebastian was barely hanging on, and as far as Seb could tell Murphy was only staying in to try to catch Harris cheating… because no one had spotted how he was doing it yet, but he was DEFINITELY cheating.

Moriarty stood off to the side with Quincy until Sebastian folded in disgust.

“I’m out.”

“Damn,” Murphy sighed and dropped his cards.

“Pleasure playing with you gentlemen,” Harris said with a faint smirk as he gathered up the pot.

“Harris,” Moriarty chuckled over a bottle of beer, “Are you fleecing these poor military men, or corrupting their morals?”

“They CLAIMED to be able to cheat at cards, sir…. Prior to that i was just going to play for pretzels…”

Sebastian turned to say something and got a good look at the way Moriarty was dressed… frighteningly casual, and everything about the styling made him look younger and softer. “that's… a different look, sir.”

“Cover identity,” he shrugged. “Seriously, though, did Harris talk you into-”

“No, sir,” Sebastian sighed, “it was… everyone understood cheating was involved in the game- we just thought we were better at it.”

Jim started snickering. Eventually he sent the other fellows off on their assignments and looked over at Sebastian, “I thought you would get back today: in addition to stocking up the fridge, I finally got your present finished.”

“My… present, sir?”

“Go check your rooms.”

Sebastian walked into his rooms with a degree of bewilderment- the recent job hadn’t been anything spectacular- and he didn't see any boxes or anyth-

There, on the wall next to his framed picture of Roxie, was a new piece of artwork. Sebastian slowly walked up to it, staring…

It was a full length image of Roxie in an outfit he thought looked familiar: she was facing away and looking over her shoulder with an impish grin and a wink … there was something of a professionally lettered ‘title’ that said, “Give in” and her familiar signature…

“...wow…” 

“I DO hope you recognize the outfit, Sebastian.”

“It’s-” he was going to say ‘it was familiar’, when the lacy capri pants and barely there bustier snapped into focus, “Lola! From What Lola Wants… err… Damn Yankees!”

“Correct,” Jim said approvingly. “Although Roxie didn't change her hair color and it IS more typically played as a redhead: the outfit is very similar.”

Sebastian turned with a smile, “Right… you’d said you got me a photo… Thank You!” he looked back at the two photos sadly, “Never could find out what happened to her, or if she’s still performing anywhere- although i think word would get around if she was. Anthony hadn’t heard from her, either.”

Sebastian looked back at Jim who was looking at the photos with an odd expression. “I wonder if she usually did musicals? I mean, other than Queen- but that was a themed contest.” he considered, “She was definitely a Queen fan, though.”

Jim shrugged, “I’m a Queen fan. “ he paused and added, “and I still like musicals.”

Sebastian walked up and looked him over- he looked so much softer in this outfit- “You’re looking good- glad to see you’re eating even if i’m not here.”

Jim laughed, “Well, you did warn me about the side effects!”

They both said- not quite in unison- “Weight gain and an addiction to cooking shows!”

Sebastian carefully put an arm around him as they walked out to the kitchen. “Seriously, though: how are you sleeping?”

“Seriously?” Jim sighed and a bit of the tension in his shoulders left, “Not great- how could you tell?”

“Well, you don't LOOK like you have dark circles under your eyes, but up close your eyes look a bit puffy., and you were leaning on things, which could have been your cover identity or… could be being tired and hurting.”

“D: all of the above.” he shrugged, “my cover is an actor, and auditions can be brutal- but no one is surprised at my wearing a bit of concealer or having been up too late.”

Sebastian found the ingredients to a lot of what Jim considered ‘comfort food’- and ‘my mom’s soup that cures everything’- and started making something. “You’ve been being more secretive than usual about your plans.” he put forward quietly.

Jim shrugged, “Because everyone would hate them.”

“Maybe there’s a reason everyone would hate them?”

“Maybe i don’t CARE if everyone else would hate them?”

Sebastian let the food prep put him in a calmer state before he continued talking.

“We… you know… i know it's not very ‘professional’ but a lot of us worry about you.”

“Including you?”

“Especially me.”

“...you are going to despise this, and i want you out of the country before a lot of it goes down.”

Sebastian took a deep breath. “No.”

“No? What the hell do you mean, ‘no’, Moran?”

“Moran again, is it?” Sebastian kept cooking and didn’t look over. “I said no, because you’ve been secretive, and twitchy, and you ordered everyone not to talk to me, and this is the first time i have even been in the same room with Quince-”

“He couldn't have told you anything because i didn't tell HIM!” Jim sounded annoyed.

“Quincy didn't tell me jack shit, but the FACT that you are trying to keep me from comparing notes with him- or any of the rest of the guys in the unit- says you are REALLY trying to keep me from finding out what’s going on.”

“And maybe i have my reasons for that!”

Sebastian took a very deep breath and put down the utensils. He turned around and walked over to the counter near Jim and put his hands down flat on the counter. “And maybe i’m worried about your reasons.”

“Why is it your business to worry about my reasons?”

“I’m your bodyguard- one of them.”

“That can be changed.” Jim growled at him.

“And I care about you- which you can’t do a damn thing about unless you want to shoot me..”

Jim was glaring at him when he said it and very slowly he stopped glaring and just looked lost. “I have no idea what to do with that, Moran.”

“Can you start by going back to calling me Sebastian? Given that we are in private.”

“... Sebastian.” Jim sagged into a chair, “You are one annoying… Alright… well… I’m… taking a good solid aim at Mycroft Holmes, and it's...risky.”

“I can drop the man from-”

“No, you can’t…” and then very quietly, “I’m not the only one with failsafes, Tiger.”

Sebastian felt like his blood froze. “Oh?”

He had his head down a bit and was staring at his hand, flexing it slowly like his fingers hurt. “You think that the SIS- and the people behind the SIS who are even more up to their eyeballs in dirty tricks- didn’t get all kinds of bio-metrics and information out of holding me?”

Sebastian turned down one of the cook pots and sat down, “talk to me? Please? I can’t help without enough information...”

Jim started rubbing slowly at his wrist- a gesture Sebastian knew well from too many handcuffs. “First of all, they managed to figure out where I was to have me picked up- yes he probably had help from Sherlock and yes I had gotten careless, but… he… made it very clear I could be picked up again.”

Sebastian wanted more than ever to rip that man limb from limb, instead he reached out and offered his arm to Jim who came up and leaned into him in a way he hadn't since the cottage.

After a while he continued, “I… had done some business for their Ultra Clearance folks before- always remotely- basically things they needed disavowable…”

“That makes sense...”

“So he probably does have spies in my network- even if that's NOT how he found out where i was… and he probably has spies planted with most of my major competitors and clients.”

Sebastian whistled slowly, “So… yeah even if none of your people were compromised that's… bad..”

Jim was ever so faintly shivering under his hand and arm- it was subtle but there- “and if he dies… or if he decided he didn't care anymore about my failsafes… then…”

“Right,” Sebastian thought about how long it had taken him to get over being captured, and thought about how much worse it would have been if there was an ongoing fear that they could just… pick him back up, and shuddered.

Sebastian took a deep breath. “Ok, what do we need to do?”

“I THINK i got my DNA and fingerprints and all that scrambled in their system.” Jim muttered.

 _This is no way to have this conversation_ , Sebastian thought: he picked Jim up.

“Awk!”

“Just getting you a drink and moving to a more comfortable place to talk.” Sebastian carried him along to the fridge, “can you grab those two bottles?”

Jim chuckled weakly and grabbed them, and Sebastian carried him along to the sofa. “There. Much better.” He said firmly once he was seated on the sofa and Jim was tucked up next to him again.

“Have i mentioned lately that you are very, very strange?”

“Not lately.”

“How are you a stone cold killer and such a big softie?”

Sebastian shrugged, “I’ve always liked taking care of my friends- just… usually that's more along the lines of smacking them in the arm and telling them to stop drinking so much.” he smiled down at Jim, “As opposed to telling you to drink more so you don’t dehydrate, although i said THAT to a lot of people in the sandbox too. You were saying you think you got your Identifiers deleted?”

Jim made an exaggerated face at him and started drinking his soft drink. “Deleted or scrambled… i think... Maybe… but I can't be sure, and anything that is off the books doesn't matter anyway- and his failsafes would be off the books.”

“And if he has failsafes he would have passed on your allergies wouldn’t he,” Sebastian sighed. “You ARE carrying your epi pen to these auditions, right?”

“Exactly.” Jim sighed, “All it takes is someone “accidentally” getting blue cheese on my salad and... it's easy to kill someone in a hospital.”

“If anything happens to you i will-”

“which is … one of many reasons why i need you out of the country, Sebastian: if… if something did happen to me, they would take out any of my people they could to prevent my failsafes from going off.”

Sebastian sat there quietly while they both drank their soda. After a while he pointed out that he did need to check on the cook pot, and Jim pointed out that no matter how comfortable the sofa was he did want to eat, and they ended up back in the kitchen.

Once Sebastian had served the first course he asked, “Can… you tell me what you have planned? Look, I’m going to be a nervous wreck…”

“I… I have stage one in motion, and I’m still kind of working on the details of stage two.” Jim muttered into his food.

“Uh huh, and i won’t like it?”

“I… need to make things loud enough and busy enough that Mycroft- and any of his fellows- CAN’T easily disappear me…”

Sebastian nodded slowly, “Busy I understand… Loud?”

“What happens when someone is a very high profile person?”

“Well you aren’t… wait… how can you POSSIBLY be high profile and not get arrested?”

Jim grinned evilly- wickedly- and for a moment Sebastian could only think of Roxie, but he shoved it aside.

“Well, that’s just it, Sebie… I’m going to be arrested.”


	11. Ain't Nobody’s Business

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jim has been arrested for the "Crown Jewels" incident...  
> and Sebastian sees more than a resemblance.
> 
> TW for suicidal thoughts, a past suicide mentioned, etc

Nothing had worked. Sebastian had tried to talk the man out of it and...all he had gotten was an assurance that Jim was taking security precautions…

And if Sebastian didn't want to be sent out of the country- or shot- he had to sit back and...watch his boss do something insanely risky.

Yeah yeah, the computer security fellow they had taken out at the Bank of England had made an opening for someone else to get in- and plant a backdoor access, Sebastian assumed- and yes, Jim already had someone in place as a guard in prison, several people waiting as lawyers, and a few dozen people on the police force who knew they- or their families- would PAY if there was so much as a scratch on him….

But Sebastian was desperately worried.

It was only once Tiernan reported that Jim was in custody- and their men were in place throughout- that he even felt like he could breathe again.

He went home and started cooking. He didn't even pay attention really, just… the motions were soothing. He packaged everything up- finished or not- when he noticed his eyes shutting in the middle of chopping more vegetables. _Good way to lose a finger, that._

The next morning he was unhappily picking at food and having his coffee, when the paper arrived. He really didn't WANT to read it- since it would be about Jim being arrested- but he rather figured he should.

There was a photo of Jim sitting in the display with the crown jewels, red cape thrown over his shoulders… royal crown on his head… white T-shirt...

_He looked like a tribute to Freddie Mercury._

Sebastian smiled at the memory of Roxie, wearing his gift, in a white dress and a red cloak and that… crown…?

 _No_. Sebastian wiped a hand over his eyes. “You have a type…”

He stared at the photo again.

He walked into his room, holding the newspaper and stared at the two photos of Roxie… they were heavily airbrushed, but the resemblance he had always seen was still there…

He looked back at the newspaper photo and tried to make allowances for heavy makeup and a blonde wig…

“No you did NOT…it’s not POSSIBLE!”

Sebastian carefully put the newspaper down and started going over it all…

_Jim being so quiet when he first started talking about Roxie…_

_Jim turning his back for most of the conversations later...so you couldn't see his expressions._

_Then..._

Sebastian sat down on the sofa and closed his eyes, trying to call up his memories… 

Roxie had performed ‘Teo Torriatte’ flawlessly, rehearsed… but she hadn't known it would be “Gimme the Prize” in advance, so that was more spontaneous- more genuine. He went over it like a mission in his mind- as much as he could through the haze of exhaustion he’d been under. 

Roxie had met his eyes - seen him when she came out to initially perform, and been shocked.  
Something about seeing him in the audience had frozen her in place so hard that she let that show… _why_ ? He was a recent fan: she hadn't had TIME to develop any reaction to him… but their eyes had met and she had been … shocked definitely… _Why would she be shocked?_

_She would only be shocked- stunned- at my being there if she knew I shouldn't have been there at all._

She had been confident in her win when they announced ‘Gimme the Prize’- he replayed in his mind her vicious smile: even then he had seen Moriarty in it. Then later her arms held up in triumph, her turning to the poor fool in the main stage and snarling- and how that queen had reacted…

That wasn't just a similarity of eyes and lips- and smile- that snarl, the way her hands moved, the way she held her body… The way people reacted… that was all Jim.

Roxie had come off the stage- she never did that according to Tony- and she had growled angrily against his lips even as she brushed her lips against him… he tried to reach for the memory but her voice had been lost in the music...but the hand grabbing his hair and his shirt had been strong, and confident...utterly certain that...

That she had authority- she had power over him.

And that had been an angry snarl, and a kiss...but why would she be angry and still kiss him…

Unless, as Jim said when he was called in: “i thought at best you were going to go BACK out to finish the job.”... _flattered that i had come to see Roxie, and angry that i had blown off his assignment…_

The assignment that Jim KNEW would overlap the Queen competition. _He sent me on that assignment because he knew I would go to the club if I could…Amazing how I had always been sent out of town on assignment when Roxie performed- just so amazing!_

Sebastian got down a bottle of something and a glass and stared angrily at a memory of a stage. “You sent me out… and I never asked how you found out so damn fast I was back in the country early… i assumed someone had seen me or you’d tracked me… but no, it was a shit ton simpler than that, wasn't it Jim? You knew i wasn't off on your assignment because YOU SAW ME THERE!”

Every interaction shifted in his view…

Jim looking oddly at the pictures of Roxie- at him- when Jim gave him the new photo. _Wanting to know if i would catch on?_

Jim insisting he HAD to watch all those musicals…Sondheim and Fosse, Judy Garland and Liza Minelli- Roxie’s usual choices.

Jim’s comment… “I’m a Queen fan... and I like musicals,” in response to his comment about Roxies taste in music…

 _Just how BLIND was I? No wonder he doesn't trust me to watch his back, or trust my opinion on what he’s doing…_ “I’m an IDIOT!”….

Sebastian hurled the glass at the wall. “I looked him right in the face back at the beginning and told him there was a resemblance, and I STILL didn't get it? he must think i’m completely incompetent…”

 _How many of the men knew?_ _How_ … the club burned down, and he’d been told by Quincy that Jim had taken an interest in the place after hearing… after he… was _Quincey lying to me?_

... _No, I would bet good money Quincy hadn't known either- not the way he talked to Jim about Roxie… and none of the rest of them had ever seen her- at least not until after he was sent out of the country_ …

Sebastian drank straight from the bottle and tried to understand how he could have missed it.

_Jim marveling over how ‘surprisingly observant in the oddest ways’ he was… because i noticed the brand of chocolate he liked, but not that he was Roxie- who liked expensive chocolates…_

He couldn't taste the alcohol- it just burned.

_Hell, did… Did JIM send those SIS men after me? Because he was angry that I was there?_

_He… didn't seem angry after?_

_But why?_

_Why never tell me? Even… even after i came back and…_

Sebastian fell into a spiral of anger and doubt and soon enough he was remembering far too many things his father had said to him…

insults, 

finding out ‘friends’ had betrayed him, 

...never good enough...

The court martial… stepping onto the city streets as a civilian and being so damn lost…

Because he hadn't seen it coming…

Not at all…

He never saw the obvious- not until it was too late.

Useless.

It was when he found himself staring at the weaponry and wondering if it was worth the effort to even go out and get another drink that he snapped back to another memory- one equally as emotional, equally painful…

Galen was dead- he’d gotten hold of a pistol and… he was dead and Sebastian hadn't been able to save him or even… he hadn't even known he was considering…

He made all the men swear to him that they would call him- or one of the other men- if they ever considered it: Quincy had just looked at him bleakly, but Murphy had raised an eyebrow, “I will if you will.”

That had broken the damn- that Murphy said something…

Sebastian had given them his word.

He’d taken 8 phone calls-and made two- before things had settled out and everyone was just… going on, working- as it turned out, for Jim...

They’d made it- they'd survived...Hell, Neal had gotten married…

...

Sebastian’s hand was shaking as he picked up the phone and dialed.

Quincy answered, “Hey, I’m a bit busy- my night off is tomorrow-”

“I’m calling.” Sebastian’s voice shook, “I’m not safe- not near my guns… or the booze, probably.”

He heard what sounded like a swear, quickly muffled, “Sir? Are you at … your usual flat?”

“I… guess it's usual?”

“Murphy’s off duty tonight- I’m going to call him. If he can’t make it i’ll call Tobin-”

“Tobin had… regular hours…” Sebastian wiped a hand across his eyes and held onto the phone.

“So did YOU back when, and you stayed with me for eight hours. Go take a shower? Get cleaned up… order in some take out. One of us will be right there.”

He forced himself to do that. It was easier to follow orders...he was still standing in the shower staring at memories when he heard someone knock on the bathroom door.

A short while later, Murphy let himself in. “There was a confused guy with take out so i paid him and shooed him away. I assume you ordered it because it's all Indian and Pakistani stuff.”

Murphy was in short sleeves- Sebastian idly noted that he’d gotten a few new scars and what looked like it might be a tattoo.

He reached past Sebastian and turned off the shower. “You’re gonna turn into a prune; come on- you got your jump bag?”

“I don’t have anywhere to go?”

“My place- i kicked the girl out.”

“I… don’t…”

Murphy raised an eyebrow, “Every other one of the lads is on duty- hell, Neal is out of the country- so you're stuck with me. I know you’d prefer Quincy-”

Sebastian shook his head and took the proffered towel, “No, I really wouldn't.”

“You… wouldn't?”

“He… he was there.”

Murphy’s puzzled expression was funny enough that Sebastian started to laugh- it collapsed into sobs… somehow Murphy got him a bathrobe and over to the couch.

“Oooooookay… he was there… and i wasn’t?”

Sebastian nodded.

“Well that rules out a lot… Can you tell me what set this off? I thought things were… well, under control anyway?”

Sebastian had no idea how to explain it. “I was… I was so worried… Jim… that bastard…” Sebastian took a deep breath, “The SIS threatened to pick him back up… and i was worried- he’s in jail…”

Murphy’s expression softened, “Yeah, you got it bad.” he looked around the room- took in the empty bottles…

 _Bottles_? Sebastian muttered, “I only remember one…”

“It's a bit late, but… better safe than sorry,” Murphy sighed, “back in the bathroom Colonel, we need to get as much of that alcohol out of your system as we can.”

The less said, or remembered, about that the better. 

Murphy walked him through brushing his teeth and then dragged him back out and put food and coffee in front of him. He also staunchly refused to actually TALK about anything until Sebastian had eaten and he had checked his vitals afterwards.

...

“Ok,” Murphy nodded, “Now...what got you so twisted up? The fact that he’s in prison? Because i know a couple of the guards on him in prison and trust me-”

Sebastian shook his head, “I… I can't… i don’t think i can explain if you don't know… just… go into my bedroom… go and look at the pictures of Roxie… and the newspaper.”

Murphy looked suspicious, “You gonna do anything dumb if i leave you here?”

Sebastian just shook his head and stared at his coffee.

Murphy went out- Murphy came back.

“Ok…”

“I can’t… how was i that stupid? He thinks i’m that stupid…. And maybe he sent those guys after me? I don’t know…”

“Woah! Who sent what guys?”

Sebastian managed to get out- sort of- about coming back from the Queen competition and the men in his apartment after he’d gotten his phone fixed…

Murphy held up a hand. “Hold up.”

He took a couple of deep breaths and scrubbed at his face. “Colonel? I take it you aren't spelling this out for me, because….it's a confidence?”

“I guess,” Sebastian mumbled, “It's…”

“Is it someone else’s secret?”

“... yeah.”

“You know i never once told anyone about any of the shit i know about the other guys, unless they said it was ok… “

“I know.”

“So can you bear with me that i know some shit that you don’t, and i’m trying to figure out what i can tell you, too?”

Sebastian wondered for a moment if Murphy could know- but how could he? _Quincy didn't… did he? No…_

While Sebastian was trying to make his alcohol and depression soaked brain stop running in circles, Murphy apparently worked his own things out.

“So…” Murphy smacked him upside the back of his head, “Pay attention, English!”

“Ow!” Sebastian glowered at him, “and you’re Irish, so?”

“And so is the Boss, so I have a few insights into the national character.” Murphy tried to look snotty and mostly looked annoyed, “Pay attention.”

Sebastian gave him a sloppy salute.

“So not long after you were assigned out of the country- not long after that Queen contest at Queens- AS ALL his top people found out- so it's not a secret- Mister Moriarty took an interest in the club.”

Sebastian started to say that wasn't the way anything happened- probably started to say he was Roxie, but Murphy cut him off.

“And AS EVERYONE found out AFTER the fact… he was coming out the back entrance- you know, the one the performers can use, even if most don’t- and some gangster goons- including one guy who had been fired just that day, as an assistant manager- attacked him.”

Sebastian sat up so fast everything lurched. “What?!”

“Now being an idiot- oh, pardon me… being that he was in disguise, and no one should expect him to be there; he didn't have any damn guards.”

“You…” Sebastian stopped and finally put together the emphasis on what ‘everyone knows’ and ‘we all found out later’ and shut up. “Go on…”

“Well he fought them off, but he got pretty badly hurt- concussion, and you know that scrambles how well you think.”

“Damn straight it does.”

“So he calls for a clean up- wants them interrogated- and leaves Josie, one of the bouncers to watch them. The guy who was supposed to be on security at that door was hurt BAD- needed major medical, which the boss helped out with, but anyway…Clean up crew gets there and those two get taken off, and… well as far as EVERYONE KNOWS that was that. Boss got to his doctor somehow- most people don't know how…” Murphy looked thoughtfully at Sebastian.

“Most people.” Sebastian nodded.

“And he got brought home.” Murphy adopted a puzzled look, “For some reason, even though i totally wasn’t involved in any way, i got promoted to personal guard status… funny, huh?”

“...you have weird luck that way, Murphy.”

“Yeah, well- I’m Irish. So the boss tells everyone that he wants eyes on the club, and… he tries to go back to work- which with stitches in his head-”

“What?”

“With stitches in his head, and a bruised throat, and a big lump on his idiot-i-don’t-need-bodyguards skull and half his face turning really fancy colors for a few days he wasn't exactly up to usual speed.” Murphy raised an eyebrow. “He eventually threatened to shoot some people, so we knew he was feeling better-”

Sebastian couldn't help but laugh at that.

“And then the gang- the same gang- set the fire at Queens: they know the layout because of that guy who’d been in as a manager.”

“Ouch….”

“I’d already been set up to officially buy in as part owner.”

“What?!”

“And i asked the Boss if i could keep on with it: it took a pretty nasty fight to get the insurance company to pay up, but I’m re building the place.” he smiled, “We’ll still have drag shows, but we’ll also have pole dancers, aerial silks, and dance stuff- It’ll be a lot nicer. Josie, the guy who helped the boss out?- he’s gonna stay on…”

Sebastian looked at him and tried to figure out how to ask; he finally just said, “Anthony?”

“Good guy, but you know… in addition to calling you he had all those other guys numbers…. Including… well if you went over the cameras at the club really carefully, apparently there was some SIS guy- spy of some sort- always showing up in disguise… he was there at the Queen competition: probably saw you…”

“You don’t think JIM set them on me?”

Murphy looked at him, “If JIM wanted you dead, you’d be dead: if he’d changed his mind he would have called them off... “

“So that’s why Anthony got a job at that upscale restaurant? And hasn't heard from Roxie?”

“Boss owns that place- through like a dozen fronts- but better to start fresh you know?” Murphy took a sip of his own coffee, “No one even knows how to get in touch with Roxie, except the silent partner that i bought out.... “

“Right, she… just showed up. Silent partner?”

“Rumor had it she was the silent partner's mistress? Something like that.” Murphy raised an eyebrow. “But of course you know how rumors are.”

“So… why… who knows?”

“I just TOLD you what everyone knows.” Murphy said flatly, “Franklin might know more, I suppose.”

“But not Quincy?”

“Why would Quincy be involved? Who’s gonna tell him?”

“Why were you?”

“Me? I just told you i wasn’t, but it's funny that no one clued in to the fact that one of the clean up team guys is a cousin of mine… apparently he got the clean up call to the back of the club.” Murphy poured him another coffee. “I’d been going to that club off and on, you know.”

“You HAD?” Sebastian stared at him, “why?!”

“Why else?”

“...Roxie?”

Murphy snorted, “Roxie is very very talented, and fun to watch, but i always got the impression it was look but don't touch, you know? It was loud, and the booze was decent, and the acts were good, and sometimes there were girls.” he shrugged.

“Did… the boss know you...went to the club.”

“Apparently not.”

“Did it ever… cross your mind that Roxie...looks a bit like the boss.” he added hurriedly, “Around the eyes...

Murphy snorted, “THAT crossed my mind at the bachelor party.”

Sebastian stared at him, “You LEFT before that!”

“I LEFT to go fuck one of the bachelorettes in the bathroom, then i came back in time to watch you turn into a cartoon- complete with big heart eyes- at the stage.”

“Why didn't you say anything?!”

“Lots of reasons, but maybe i figured that if you and Quincy didn't see much resemblance, that it wasn't my business to point it out?”

Sebastian sat back and tried to make his head work- tried.

“Why… why wouldn't the… why wouldn't he tell me…”

Murphy rolled his eyes, “I do NOT know what you are talking about, Colonel, but it's probably because he’s Irish.”

“The fuck does THAT have to do with it?’ Sebastian narrowed his eyes. “It’s because I’m English?”

“The love of tragedy and drama, more like,” Murphy snorted, “If there was SOME secret that the boss hasn't told you… and I'm sure I wouldn't know what that was… then it's likely put down to him either having some personal stuff about it- family, maybe? Someone gave him a hard time about it before? Maybe he thinks people would think less of him?... or it's him getting all wrapped up in drama and tragedy in his head, because he’s Irish.”

“And you know this because you’re Irish…?”

“Some of us tend to go in more for comedy, and a few go in for fights… but we ALL have a spot in whatever passes for our souls for drama.”

“He got a double dose of that one.” Sebastian muttered.

“Now, you gonna pack an overnight bag or what?”

“I’ll want to talk to you about this more.”

Murphy shrugged, “You can try, but I only know what everyone else does.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> almost everything Murphy mentions is detailed in "Killer Style" the story from Moriarty's POV in this series.
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6c_yYC8k_kk Eric Clapton "Ain't Nobody's Business ( If I Do)" /"Driftin"


	12. Standing On Higher Ground

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> conversations on a roof top

Sebastian stayed at Murphy’s place until he very literally couldn't stand it anymore: which took all of three days. Murphy stayed home every night and didn't have anyone over- and that had to be painful for the man- but their lifestyles simply didn't work together well. 

Sebastian moved back to his ‘primary flat’ but since it was also one of Jim’s primary flats, the constant reminder of his presence… well it wasn't going to work either.

He finally moved into one of the innumerable ‘just in case’ places that Moriarty maintained in or near London. He left his guns at his proper flat… along with most of his belongings… and the photos.

The team made a point of checking in on him but inactivity was… unhelpful, so when Franklin asked if he could take a sniper assignment over in America, he gratefully accepted. 

It went well, and he stopped at a nice little club before heading home- where he found out that an English accent was damn near catnip to American girls- but it was….

It was just rather flat.

He wasn't suicidal anymore, and he’d gotten over ANGRY- mostly- but he had a hard time feeling anything at all for very long.

Tricky job: challenge. Accomplish job: satisfaction. Party club and pretty girls: momentary...Not happiness, but a momentary bit of color?

Flat.

When he came back to London he took his firearm back to his old place and locked it up, looked at the kitchen - _cooking for Jim and arguing over cooking shows_ \- looked at the framed photos of Roxie - _a wicked smile and dark eyes and charisma that pulled you right to your feet._ It was down to a sort of dull pain, but he couldn't stay here.

He checked in with everyone and went back to the ‘temporary flat’ he had been staying in.

He followed the trial, of course- it wasn't like you could bloody well AVOID the trial: crime of the century! Boffin detective!  
He did his assignments.

He crossed paths with Watson once or twice- the man reminded him of half a dozen men he had served with- Donald especially: crazed military Scotsmen having some commonality apparently. Sebastian would have loved to have been able to sit down over a pint with the man, but he didn't think it was wise.

Sherlock mostly inspired a drastic urge to punch the man in the face, but that might have been because he knew who he was- what he was involved in. He was good looking enough, Sebastian supposed, but if he was going to feel anything ‘anger’ wasn't that great a choice- so he avoided him.

He did catch a few more glimpses of Mycroft Holmes.

He was good looking in a quieter way than his brother: stylish, more graceful and less frantic of motion…. Sebastian found he had an unsettling resemblance of style to Moriarty.

Oh, Jim was bigger than life, and Holmes was restrained, almost subdued, but… they both obsessed over clothing- Sebastian recognized Holmes’ tailor- and they were clearly both blade men- if that wasn't a sword cane umbrella he’d eat a bottle of hot sauce, whole, including bottle..

He did his best to stay well away from Mycroft Holmes, but it baffled him how someone who looked reasonable could be responsible for what he’d done…. So he ended up keeping an eye on him from a distance. He noticed some interestingly professional boys showing up as outlying security after a while and figured he had been noticed, so despite a nearly overwhelming urge to toy with them he just… stopped.

The men seemed worried about him- even Tobin made a point of meeting to talk to him- but...he was… ok.

Just marking time until something happened, he supposed.

Jim was released, of course: Not guilty.

Sebastian had done some of the work for that ‘not guilty’. It turned out the best people to use a telephoto camera lens were snipers-and the rest was all up to his computer people…

But in the end, after all that publicity- and Sherlock Holmes annoying a judge into sending him up for contempt- it came down to that: not guilty.

Sebastian was watching from a sniper’s perch as he was released; a few of his disposable people picked him up and took him to Baker Street…

Sebastian wasn't supposed to be anywhere near Baker Street, but even though everything seemed to have worked out, he still worried about Jim…the feeling was sort of flattened, but it was there.

 _Sigh_.

He got over there quickly enough and went to set up on an observation point- only to find someone already there.

The down side of full on gear is it really fucked with your hearing and peripheral vision: Sebastian, by contrast, was in trainers and civilian wear and had a few moments to study the guy before he turned his head…

“Hey, Dev- been a while.”

Dev stared over his shoulder for a few beats before rolling over and sitting up away from the sniper scope. “Moran?! Fuck… what are you doing…?” he looked around the roof incredulously and then back, “How the fuck did you get here? For that matter WHY are you here? I… “ he looked over the civilian clothes and the hands in plain sight and honestly his puzzled look was funny enough that Sebastian started to grin.

“Mind if i get out a smoke? Wouldn't want you to misinterpret…”  
Dev just waved a go ahead and then said, “Uh… I’m… kind of working here…”

“Yeah,” Seb got out his cigarettes- he didn't smoke much but it was something to do with his hands when he didn't have a weapon in them. “Afraid that's… kind of the issue? I mean as long as you’re just on SECURITY detail we’re cool, but...i wouldn't want you to do anything that would set off… a lot of issues.” The hit of nicotine after so long was intense.

Dev stared at him and then dragged a hand over his face. “This entire building is secured, how the HELL did you get up here?”

Sebastian just shrugged, “So… PLEASE tell me you’re on ‘just in case’ duty and not starting anything?”

Dev sighed, “Give me one of those fags, man.” he held out a hand, “Yeah, I’m on security: stand-by, not hot.”

Sebastian walked over and folded himself down to sit on the roof next to him and handed over a cigarette and his lighter. “That’s good. not too many times I cross paths with people i know- I’d hate to have this go bad.”

“So… you ARE working for him?”

“Maybe.”

“Maybe?” he raised an eyebrow, “Kinda late to be coy about it.”

“I’m not being coy; i just have no idea if I’m going to be fired, sent back out of the country, or what.”

Dev blinked a lot. “So… uh… but you’re working…?”

Sebastian shook his head. “I’m off duty.”

“You… are off duty… and just HAPPENED to show up here?”

Seb rested his hands on the roof top and leaned back- yeah, it pretty well gave Dev an opening to gut him, but he wasn't the type to do it without provocation- “I’m off duty, and i worry about him- always worried too much about my people.”

“...yeah, you always did… uh… isn’t he your BOSS though?”

“Yeah. I guess I just worry about people? He’s a good boss, even if he is kinda fucked up.” Sebastian chuckled, “Pot, kettle…”

“You… uh… you’re on a hot list you know.”

“Am I?” he shrugged, “Wasn’t sure your side even knew I existed anymore- you work for Holmes, right?”

“Officially that's classified.”

Sebastian raised an eyebrow, “Officially there is no one here on this roof but you.”

Dev scrubbed at his face again, “I need you to vanish, man: I don't want to have to turn you in.”

“You mean kill me,” Sebastian corrected, “Because i’m not getting taken in by him, not after what they did to my boss.”

Dev looked a bit puzzled, “What?”

“You don’t know? He was taken in and ‘interrogated’.”

“Uh… i know he was picked up…”

“He was in better shape than i was when i got rescued, but...that's not saying much.”

Dev was very quiet for a while. He glanced through the scope once or twice but he kept his hands away from the trigger so Sebastian didn't worry.

He sat up from the scope after a few times and said, “Well that’s my main assignment over- Your man just left.”

“Main assignment?”

“Uh… my boss is around… I'm also security for that.”

“Oh.” he looked around thoughtfully, “hang on.” 

He texted Quincy. “You on Baker Street detail?”

“Yeah, WHY are you messing up my line of sight on the sniper?”

“It’s Dev: he wasn't starting anything.”

“Oh? Uh… he’s ok then?”

“Yeah, you starting anything with big brother?”

“No, just packing down.”

“Anyone starting anything with him?”

“Not that I know of?”

“Cool- I’ll catch up with you later.”

Sebastian put the phone away, “The on-duty guy says he doesn't have any orders to hit your boss- he was just security too.”

“Fuuuck…” Dev held out his hand for another cigarette- Sebastian gave him one and lit it for him. “We didn't spot anyone- that’s bad,” he looked tiredly at Sebastian, “And you could have killed me, which is worse.”

“Well… yeah. I mean no harm done, but yeah: you need to have some WORDS with your security sweep people.”

Dev scratched at his head the way he always had, “Your boss… got worked over bad? I… didn’t think we did that in the country?”

Sebastian raised an eyebrow, “We’ve ALWAYS done that here: we just do it more openly in other places: yeah, he got worked over hard: if he hadn't had failsafes going off…”

“Sure heard about those- everyone did...That was you took out the door guy on the club, wasn't it?”

“Yeah,” Sebastian smiled, “I even hung around a bit too long to make sure the shot was good.”

“You know the layout was planned to make that impossible.”

“Flattery will get you everywhere Dev.”

“Were… you…”

Sebastian raised an eyebrow, “Might not tell you, but go ahead.”

Dev described one of his jobs in Europe.

Sebastian brightened up, “Oh yeah, that was a tough one: got a personal ‘good job’ from the boss for that one!”

Dev just shook his head and started packing down, “If no one’s starting anything…” he kept the scope out but nothing else. “Boss thought that job was you.”

“Like i said: didn't even know your boss knew I existed…”

“Well… he does- enough to have you on an alert.” he looked at Sebastian for a while, “You seriously - SERIOUSLY - showed up, lightly armed, and got up here, somehow, OFF DUTY... because you were worried about your boss?”

“Err… yeah?”

“Not… to be rude or anything, but are you two… uh…” he waved his hands suggestively.

Sebastian rolled his eyes, “No. I had the world’s worst crush on the guy and he very firmly and politely put me off.”

“Doesn't seem like you should be using the past tense on that crush.” he looked around, “Uh… look, i can give you until i get back to base and report in as a head start, but…”

“Appreciated.”

“And uh… thanks for not taking my ass out when you snuck up on me- you gonna tell me how the fuck you did that?”

Sebastian was debating what to tell him when his priority text alert went off. “Hold on a sec…” 

“What the FUCK are you doing on a roof with one of the Iceman’s snipers?” _no signature but only one person would send that text._

He sent back a query anyway: “Sir?”

“Damn straight- well?!”

“It’s… a bit complicated for a text?”

“Also Q tells me you aren't living in your flat anymore?”

“Also complicated”

“Get your ass in here.”

“Oi…” Sebastian looked up at a very curious looking Dev, “Boss just found out I was here and is a bit peeved.”

“Peeved like you need me to bring you in for your own safety?”

“Peeved like I better bring some chocolate with me?”

Dev stared at him. “So you’re dating, but not fucking.”

Sebastian stared back, “Where the hell did you get that?”

“Your BOSS texted you and is pissed off, so you’re going to take him chocolate?”

“He … likes chocolate?”

Dev just looked at him. Finally he threw up his hands. “Jesus Christ, you’re worse than my sister! she was moved in for a flatshare with this girl, trying to figure out how to tell her she had a crush on her, and the other girl was telling everyone they’d been a couple for a year and just taking it slow!”

Sebastian tried to make sense of this, “You… uh… think he’s...interested in me because I’m going to take him chocolate?”

Dev walked up and smacked Sebastian upside the back of his head.

“Ow!”

“Try this one: some random employee is getting angry texts from Moriarty, and their reaction isn't to run off immediately and grovel, or try to hide, or act like a court martial… it's to buy him chocolates!”

Sebastian tried to picture it and… “uh… i mean… maybe…” he thought about any of the other guys- he couldn't picture it, not even from Rohaan. “No… not… really?”

Dev grabbed his scope and put it in the pack down case, “Fucking hell man, go buy the scary little psycho his chocolates and try to keep him from igniting World War Three, ok?” he was heading to the door when he paused, “And my sister’s wedding reception is at Dartmouth House on Sunday if you happened to drop by- but DON’T bring your boyfriend because i’m not covering that much up and he’s way too recognizable.” and he walked out and slammed the door.

Sebastian's phone buzzed.

“I have no idea why he hit you upside the head but i know for sure you deserved it- Q”


	13. Misunderstood

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A really messed up discussion between Sebastian and Jim- but its progress? yay?
> 
> (note: these two talk PAST each other a lot, and both have... well a lot of preconceived notions)  
> TW for abuse of fine china

Jim was the only one there- glaring at him- when he got back to his flat- _their flat?_... “I… picked up some chocolate- figured you didn't get any in jail.”

Jim kept glaring at him, “WHY were you up on a roof talking to one of the Iceman’s snipers?”

“Because even if I shouldn't; I still worry about you.” Sebastian said quietly, “So I got up on the usual vantage point to keep an eye on you and… someone else was already up there.”

Jim at least stopped glaring, although he looked dubious, “So why isn't someone dead?”

Sebastian tried to puzzle out what was going on and finally just shrugged, “It was Dev? I knew him … jeez, we go all the way back… i think i met him back in field training? Before the SAS, and then ran into each other after we both made it in. Apparently he works for Mycroft… um… he … said there’s an alert out on me- me specifically- and that Holmes knew about the Colfeld job…”

“Why didn’t he shoot you!”

“Uh… it was Dev? I said hi, he looked over and sort of … well it was kind of flattering to see the man get all flustered over my being up on the roof- apparently they sealed the building off, but didn't know about the wall… anyway i wasn’t armed- well, not really, just a few knives.”

Jim pinched his nose and was visibly counting to ten- Sebastian waited.

Jim pointed at the dining table, “sit!”

Sebastian just sighed and went over and sat down- he pushed the chocolate over toward the other side of the table. “Can i take off my jacket?”

“Yes.” he got two bottles out of the fridge angrily and put them down on the table and then sat down, “Why do you smell like cigarettes?”

“I had a smoke- I do that occasionally- gave Dev a couple.” Sebastian gave up on figuring it out and just asked, “WHY are you mad at me? I didn't do anything…”

Jim stared at him and started muttering angrily in… Sebastian presumed it was Irish- all he knew for sure was he didn't speak it.

Jim took a deep breath and put on that fake customer service smile, “Are you COMPLETELY oblivious, Sebastian?”

“Well… apparently.” Sebastian felt something- he didn't like that feeling. “At least you always thought so- my father usually did- i never saw the discharge coming either… why?”

Jim gave him an utterly perplexed look, “what in the HELL are you going on about?”

“You asked if i was completely oblivious,” Sebastian shrugged, “the answer is apparently yes- and stupid enough to still be hung up on you even though its pointless.”

Jim gave him a very odd look- Sebastian had no idea what it meant. “Oooookay, i think we are … not even talking about the same things here….”

“Probably,” Sebastian just felt tired again.

“Do you understand that if you weren't someone I trust with my life I would have had you shot?”

“...huh?”

Jim started banging his head on the table- luckily he had his hands in between the wood and his head but still…

“Can you… stop that?”

Jim, into the table, “What fucking PLANET are you from?!”

Sebastian had no idea what to say so he waited until Jim sat back up and took a deep breath.  
“I honestly have no idea-” he started saying but Jim cut him off.

“It… looked… like… you… were… selling… me… out!” Jim spat each word out through clenched teeth.

“...” Sebastian tried to wrap his brain around that concept and finally just squeaked, “what?!”

“You are supposed to be HERE!” he slammed his hand into the table, “Waiting for me HERE! and you MOVED OUT without even taking most of your things!”

“Well I -”

“And then you were spotted in a sniper vantage chatting away happily with a SNIPER that works for MYCROFT!” Jim glared at him, “After you LEFT!”

Sebastian sat there and tried to make it look like that- he really couldn't, but he supposed Jim…”You, uh, didn't talk to any of my guys I take it?”

Jim had his teeth gritted, “I did, briefly, which is how i found out you had MOVED OUT!”

“I moved out because I was suicidal.”

Jim started blinking a lot, “You were what?”

“I called Quincy because i was drinking way too much and… starting to be dangerous to myself,” Sebastian said quietly, “and he was on duty so he called Murphy… and Murphy got me cleaned up.” he couldn't quite look at Jim so he stared at Jim’s hands spread out on the table- they were not at all feminine, even if they were smaller than his own.

“I stayed with Murphy for … as long as I could stand it. I couldn't stay here so I stayed in the brickton flat. The guys checked in on me, and then i went back to work- did a job in America that was kind of...interesting anyway. Did some of the photography for your jury…” Sebastian shrugged, still staring at the table and the hands, “I was there when you got released, and i should have just gone home i guess, but i was worried… so i figured i’d just… keep an eye on you.”

“Why the fucking HELL would you be suicidal?”

Sebastian looked up to see a rather alarmed expression on Jim’s face- it looked out of place, not like his usual practiced expressions.

“Because I’m an oblivious moron who doesn't see shit until it bites me? Because i suddenly realized why you never really trusted me with-”

“The HELL, Moran? Not TRUST you? You’re alive even though i would have had almost anyone else shot before they got down to street level!”

“You wouldn't tell me-”

“I don't tell anyone anything!” Jim was shouting- not screaming, shouting.

“And then finding out you were Roxie the whole time just kind of threw me…”

Jim cut off yelling and stared at him with an almost stupid expression- Sebastian couldn't quite help but laugh at at and somehow that ended up in a sort of hiccupping sob… which he tried to cover by having a swig of the beer and nearly choked himself to death- ended up mopping beer off his shirt again.

“...when… did you find that out?”

“When i saw the newspaper photo of you in the crown-it was pretty damn obvious: i can’t blame you for thinking i was a complete waste of time.”

Faster than he would have thought possible Jim’s hand shot out and slapped him across the face, “Stop talking like that!”.

Sebastian brought his hand up to his face- he’d known Jim was fast but that was FAST. “Stop… talking like what…?”

“You keep putting yourself down, and you keep telling me what I THINK- and it's bloody obvious you have no IDEA what I think!”

“...well… I have to go by what I can see, since…. You don't tell anyone anything…”

Jim’s eyes narrowed. “How much did Murphy tell you?”

“Next to nothing, actually. he was trying to figure out why i was a mess- i mean specifically right then- and i told him to look at Roxie’s pictures and the news photo… and… well after he made me throw up half the booze and…. Anyway… he told me he hadn't gone HOME at the bachelor party… and...then he very carefully told me what everyone else had found out…” Sebastian shrugged, “Mostly that you’d been hurt, and… that you hadn't had any guards… the… public stuff, but when you put it together right after…”

Jim sat back, “he ACTUALLY managed to not come out and say…”

“He was pretty specific about confidences, actually… although apparently he’s related to some guy on your cleaner crew? And he pointed out that even though he was ‘not involved at all’ he suddenly got a promotion…” Sebastian looked up, “he also said that he didn't think you sent those guys.”

Jim had been listening with a frown and then tilted his head, “wait- what guys?”

“The… the men in my flat? The ones that jumped me when I got back after… after i talked to you? After the Queen competition?”

Jim stared at him with his mouth slightly open for a solid count of three and then started screaming… and throwing things.

Sebastian had trouble processing what Jim was screaming more than the general concept of “if i wanted you dead you would be DEAD!” because he spent a lot of time ducking. Jim apparently had frighteningly good aim and even with his best attempts to deflect or dodge he was getting hit with cups, plates, and was narrowly missed by a vase. He tried taking cover behind the sofa but Jim whipped a saucer or something around like a frisbee and nailed him in the shoulder… and unfortunately without a jacket that HURT.

He was trying to calculate odds on getting to a room with a door when Jim more or less landed on him and was screaming in his face… It was alarming, but as long as both of his hands were gripping his t-shirt he wasn't throwing things: he focused on NOT letting Jim beat his head into the floor very hard.

Very abruptly, and in a much calmer voice, Jim snapped, “Why the fuck are you bleeding on my rug?!”

“Uh… because you hit me with… a lot of dishware and it was sharp?”

“You’re a sniper and my bodyguard and you can be taken down by DISHWARE?!”

Not having any idea how to respond to that he went for snark, “Well, we covered guns, knives, and grenades in the SAS, but Irishmen throwing china was an advanced class…”

Jim just stared at him.

“Are… you done?” Sebastian asked hopefully.

“Why the fuck didn't you defend yourself!”

“I was trying to defend myself but you managed to curve that saucer right around the sofa… and I hadn't gotten to a room I could barricade…”

“Why didn't you hit BACK?!”

Sebastian tried to make THAT make sense and was still trying to make that make sense when Jim suddenly tightened his grip on the t-shirt, leaned down and kissed him. It was more startling than sexy and before he’d managed to figure out what to do Jim let go of him and climbed off his chest.

“Get up, go get the first aid kit, meet me in the main bathroom.” and walked off.

Sebastian spent a few moments catching his breath and staring at the ceiling, but then he figured if the boss got mad at him again he might throw more china, so he got up, got the first aid kit, and went to the bathroom.

Jim was stripped out of his suit and glaring at him again- but did not appear to have brought any crockery in with him. Sebastian held out the first aid kit wordlessly and Jim started cleaning and patching him up.

“Ow!”

“Oh shut up! I didn't even know china could splinter!” Jim was apparently digging into him with a poker, but from what he could see in the mirror it was actually something like a pair of tweezers.

“Yes, china can splinter and that isn't- OW!- how you deal with small bits!”

“OH? And just how do you deal with them?” Jim glared at his reflection.

“Usually you try water and rinsing the injury: If that doesn't work you can try tape or glue…”

“Strip.”

Sebastian very dubiously took off a surprisingly blood soaked shirt. “Oh, that's just the scalp wound- they bleed a lot.”

Jim bared his teeth, so Sebastian stripped faster; eventually he was nude and feeling intensely more vulnerable.

“Into the shower.” Jim shoved.

He was getting the temperature adjusted when a nude Jim suddenly stepped in with him.

“Ah…” words seemed to have gone somewhere. “Ah…” he tried again.

“What!?”

He finally blurted out the only thing he could manage, “You look good?” and then tried to correct and ended up babbling, “ I mean, you do, but better? The last time I saw you was right after and you look better and I should shut up now shouldn't i?”

Jim didn't say anything, just rolled his eyes… but at least he didn't seem angry anymore? Sebastian turned away to wash up and then Jim started… washing… his… back...uhhhh… “Sir, um…”

“Jim.”

“Look, i know you aren’t at all interested, but this is getting difficult-”

“I wanted to fuck you over the desk the first time i saw you.”

Sebastian’s brain short circuited.

Jim continued, “But having sex with employees is severely bad for business, and bad for my health,” he paused and then added casually, “bad for someone’s health anyway since one of us ends up dead.”

“...why...would…?”

“Because when you mix sex and business and one part of that breaks up, it goes bad!” Jim snapped. Then he muttered, “turn around.”

Sebastian turned around carefully, keeping his hands in plain sight.

Jim looked him over, “I never STOPPED wanting to fuck you.” he shrugged and started carefully washing off the injured areas, and… some … not injured areas.

Sebastian was fairly certain his voice hit a register it hadn’t since puberty, “If it's such a bad idea i REALLY think you need to stop…”

“No.”

Sebastian tried desperately to make sense of any of this, at all. “You just said…”

“I said this was a horribly bad idea.” Jim backed him into the tile and glared up at him. “Do you want me to STOP?”

“...no?”

“Sounded like a question, Moran.”

“Uh, well… i … don't want to…”

“Do or don’t!?”

“I desperately want to take you to bed and make sure you’re alright, and get my mouth all over you, and get my hands all over you, and … no i don’t just want to fuck the boss.” he paused, “or just GET fucked by the boss… because… because that wouldn't ...that would kind of imply that you just… wanted to fuck me because you thought i looked good- which admittedly is better than me thinking you thought i looked like a slob…”

“You manage to look adorable AND look like a slob, sort of: disheveled, in a good way.” Jim snorted, “god knows how- AND you clean up beautifully, AND you have an utterly fabulous skill with weapons… and if that's all it was i would still be sending you out of town every time i got too worked up!”

“THAT’S why?!”

“One reason why.” Jim looked around, “I’m turning into a prune- out!”

Sebastian stepped out carefully and Jim made him stand there while he was inspected for bits of china, and bandaged.

“I… don't understand…”

“First of all, those SIS boys were PROBABLY sent after you by the spy that had been in the audience at Queen night: from what i got out of my sources he spotted you and… probably was trying to have you brought in for questioning and maybe recruitment- that might have meant an offer or it might have meant threats.”

Sebastian grabbed hold of something that made FAR more sense than Jim Moriarty’s moods or behavior. “There… was a spy? In the audience?”

“I knew he was a spy- well I eventually figured it out anyway- he was a fan: one of the ones that had Tony on retainer.”

“You… think one of your fans…?” Sebastian let himself be steered out of the bathroom- well away from the broken china- and into _Jim’s_ bedroom before he quite realized where they were going. “I really don’t think-”

“No you DON'T think!” Jim snapped. “I’d JUST found out that you’d managed the impossible- done the job brilliantly and been back in time for the show- and then i almost LOST you! I was FURIOUS! And now i find out you think *I* sent them?!”

“I… didn't then… but you kept- you KEEP trying to get RID of me!”

Jim shoved him until he sat down on the bed and sat on his legs facing him, pinning his legs- one hand grabbed his hair and it was dizzyingly, suddenly, the club again…

“Were you not doing valuable work? Were you doing EASY work? Do i send personal congratulations to just ANYONE for doing their damn JOB?”

The proximity of a nude Jim Moriarty, the hand in his hair, all the confusion and stress, was doing very odd things to his sense of… everything. “No… sir?”

“I sent you out of town to give us BOTH a chance to cool off- since this is a HORRIBLE idea- as well as getting you out of sight until i could find out who targeted you!”

“And it was… a fan?”

Jim smiled like he was going to bite Sebastian’s throat out, “It was a fan. It was my damn spy, the one who kept showing up in different disguises, the one whose drink i threw back before i came over to you that night - gave him a damn autographed photo that i hadnt handed out yet - and then to find out after everything went to HELL that he was Mycroft-fucking-Holmes!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Misunderstood" seemed appropriate as song lyrics.


	14. We Need To Talk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a lot of very heavy discussion.

Sebastian heard what Jim said as if from a distance. “You said… the spy who sent those men was… a fan of Roxie’s… and … he was Mycroft Holmes?” Sebastian could feel that deadly calm suddenly flood through him. “Mycroft Holmes, the man who had you tortured?”

Jim said something and tried to kiss him: Sebastian pushed him back gently and caught hold of his arms. “Did you ever get wrapped up in a sheet or a blanket?” he saw the confusion and rephrased, “Did anyone ever trap you by wrapping you up in a sheet or blanket?”

Jim gave him the oddest look, “what? No…? I mean, i used to wrap myself-”

Sebastian yanked the sheet off the bed and started wrapping the man up in it.

“The FUCK are you DOING?” Jim protested, but he sounded more confused than murderous.

“I am getting YOU wrapped up in a sheet, and putting at least a pair of pajama trousers on me, because I can't THINK with you sitting naked on me…” he narrowed his eyes, “And i’m beginning to think that may be part of the point.”

“If you can still think straight when I’m done with you I’ve lost my- PUT ME DOWN YOU IDIOT!” Jim yelled as Sebastian picked him up.

“No. we are going to TALK.”

Sebastian ignored every other thing the man said as he retrieved his shoes, at least, so he could pick his way past the debris and into his own rooms. Holding Jim while he went through a drawer for his pajamas was a bit awkward until the man stopped struggling.

“Are you alright? You stopped cursing or trying to kick me.”

“... just… the paper…”

Sebastian looked at the newspaper where it lay on his bed. “Yes, that's where i dropped it before i started drinking and got a bit too unhappy too close to my guns.”

“Why… would you… I don't get it.”

Sebastian muttered, “sofa probably has shards of tea cup,” and set him down on his bed next to the paper. He picked it up and tried not to look at it as he put it aside.

“Your bed is DUSTY!” Jim stared at his hand and then at the clean spot the paper had been in.

“Well, yeah, i expect the cleaning folks never came in here.” Sebastian shrugged and pulled on his pajama bottoms.

“I thought you said you still… were...interested…?”

“For reasons that i suppose i could figure out if i bothered to try, i have been hung up on you… probably since i first met you- no, since i first met YOU… the mousy persona you used to interview me was cute but not that interesting.” Sebastian gave up on finding a place to really sit and leaned on his dresser.

“Then why are you getting DRESSED?!” Jim shouted, and then wiped his hand on the sheet he was wrapped in, “This is disgusting.”

“Its dusty- that happens when you drop everything and call your buddies so you don't kill yourself.” Sebastian took a deep breath and tried counting to three, but Jim spoke up before he got that far.

“WHY?! Why the fuck…” he trailed off. “Why would you be suicidal?!”

Sebastian tried to consider that. “Lots of shit….um… look i know you don't really like to hear about a lot, but… you asked?”

Jim nodded dubiously, so Sebastian went on. “I had a fucked up home life-”

“You’re some kind of NOBLE!”

Sebastian raised an eyebrow, “Just because someone else had it worse doesn't mean you had it good.”

Jim blinked at him a lot so he continued before Jim could interrupt again, “Nothing i did was ever good enough for my dad- ever- so eventually i just… stopped trying. I got into the SAS and even that wasn't good enough for him, but… it meant i had a bunch of people with me who … who DID know what it took to get in.” Sebastian considered, “In hindsight a lot of them were assholes.”

Jim laughed and then clapped his hand over his mouth and pantomimed locking his lips shut.

“But being in the military helped- i had clear rules, i know what people wanted… and… i was good at it- people admitted i was good at it… Until suddenly we were losing people because of bad intel, and being ordered to do things that anyone on the ground could tell you were all wrong, and then my people were getting shit canned… and there wasn't anything i could do.” Sebastian’s hands were shaking so he flexed them on the edge of the dresser. “After Galen died-”

“Who?”

Sebastian blinked a bit- he’d just always assumed Jim knew everything. “Galen was one of the men, but he killed himself before the trial. After that I made everyone promise to call me or talk to someone… if they ever… felt like that. Murphy made me promise before he would.” he looked up, “That's why i called someone.”

“But why would you want to KILL yourself?”

“I don't know that i did… exactly… but i wasn't thinking clearly- i was drinking a lot- too much, Murphy made me throw up- and… it seemed tempting- just… stop hurting.” he looked at Jim’s angry face, “You wouldn't tell me shit, and i couldn't protect you… and you were locked up, and… then i found out you were Roxie… and how much you must have laughed and thought i was stupid…”

“STOP SAYING THAT!” Jim jumped to his feet- which was … not a great idea wrapped up in a sheet mostly, and he almost fell: luckily Sebastian grabbed the sheet and… well it was a mess and they both ended up on the floor, but no one was hurt.

“... this is stupid.” Jim muttered

Sebastian sat up slowly. “I can climb a wall, or a cliff face, carrying a full pack or an injured teammate- but god help me i’m a menace on a perfectly flat floor…”

“I didn’t so much laugh as sigh in relief.” Jim mumbled into his knees.

“What?”

“That you didn't… that you didn't realize who I was. Then i started sending you and Quincy out any time i was planning.... I didn’t know what to DO when you showed up at Queen night!” he laid his head sideways on his knees and looked incredibly young for a moment, “And i had no idea Murphy, of all people, was attending- or had spotted me.”

Sebastian leaned back carefully against the bed. “I kept seeing the resemblance….just figured i had a type- i KNEW it was attractive…”

“If you still think I’m attractive why are you getting DRESSED!”

“Because this whole mess is a mess because you won't talk to me?”

Jim glared at him, “What is there to talk about? It's a horrible idea and i don't care anymore.”

“Well… that’s one question: why is it a horrible idea?”

“Like i said,” Jim grumbled, “Employees and sex? Business and sex? I mean unless it's just a… once and done scratch the itch? If the business goes south you have an enemy in your bed- if the sex goes south you have an enemy in your business.”

Sebastian sighed, “Can’t it just be.. Like: ‘we tried, it didn't work out, and… let's sit down like grown ups and figure out what to do next?’”

Jim snorted at him, “Have you EVER seen a break up work that well?”

Sebastian considered, “A few, but… I’ll admit not… a lot.”

“Add in the LINE of business we’re in? I mean this isn't just two office workers.”

“Ok, you got me there.” Sebastian sighed, “I’ve been… interested in you for years though? I mean you haven't had any- i THOUGHT you weren't interested in me…”

Jim waved a hand, “Have you seen you? Just on your looks I’d climb you like a tree.”

Sebastian grinned.

“And that crooked shy grin? And the way you duck your head and blush? You do that shit and i want to lock you to my bed and do TERRIBLE things to you, Tiger, but then you nail a killer shot from impossible distances and kill people while half asleep and come up with beautiful vicious murders ...well it’s sexy as FUCK- but in kind of a different direction.”

“You never did give me that kiss you talked about for the fail safes.”

Sebastian was just teasing but Jim narrowed his eyes and lunged, and suddenly Sebastian had a hand in his hair and a pair of vicious dark eyes FAR too close and…

And then he was drowning in a kiss- burning in it- being buried alive in it…

When he could finally do anything other than moan and dig his hands into the man, he heard Jim chuckling, “I figured that would shut you up.”

Sebastian blinked a few times, “If...look, i don't WANT this to just be trying to scratch an itch, or … or be shutting me up…”

Jim raised an eyebrow, “Oh? Then what do you want? Given that I may PLAY Roxie, but… the little minx is just one part of my nature and the rest of me is a vicious sonofabitch.”

“I...I want a real relationship? You know, one where...where you come home in a bad mood and I make you dinner and… i guess go shoot whatever it was… and then i get to rub your back and curl up with you until… well… until we decide on what we’ll do other than just sleeping?”

Jim looked dubious, “What if i wanted to tie you up and make you scream? Or I wanted someone to tie me up and make ME scream?”

“I… won't HURT you? That would… not be sexy for me.” Sebastian considered it and smirked, “I wouldn't mind teasing you until you forget how to make coherent threats, though?”

Jim hesitated for a long moment. “What if i wanted to hurt you?” he said it quietly, as if it had somehow escaped Sebastian’s notice that he was a bit sadistic.

“It wouldn’t exactly be a surprise,” Sebastian said drily, and then considered… “i have no idea? i never thought of it as being fun... Uh...you’d have to be damn careful you didn't trigger a flashback.”

Jim looked speculative, which looked really scary and made Sebastian’s dick twitch, “What about tying you up and making you beg to be fucked?”

“It sounds like a horrible idea, but … uh... “ he waved at his obviously tented pajamas, “Apparently little Seb there didn't get that memo.”

Jim sucked on his lower lip. “You… HONESTLY want a serious relationship?”

“Yes.”

“With ME?!”

“Yes.”

Jim looked suspicious and asked, “Do you EXPECT me to dress up in a corset or anything?”

“No? I mean… i hadn't known you were Roxie until…” he waved at the paper. “Now that i know i sure as FUCK wouldn’t turn it down, but no i don’t expect it… um…”

“What if it doesn't work out?”

“Point me at someone to shoot my frustrations out on?” Sebastian shrugged. “Send me back out on missions in other countries? It's what you were doing anyway.”

“I’ve only ever had… I guess maybe one? Serious relationship and that was… well, a fucking long time ago,” Jim looked at him sideways- and he didn't need fake lashes- “It emphatically didn't work out… and...i want to know more about this whole suicidal shit… and your team… and… a lot.”

Sebastian raised an eyebrow, “I want to know why you keep sending me out of the country, won't tell me shit, have an obsession with being betrayed, and why the fuck i can’t just shoot Mycroft Holmes yet.”

“If you shoot him, he dies.”

“That is kind of the point, yeah?”

“So first of all his failsafes go off and that’s more shit than I'm prepared to deal with.”

“...right…” Sebastian sighed, “Any other reason?”

“I’m WAY too pissed at him to let him off that easy.”

“...Planning on having the boys work him over first?”

“No. He cares about one thing and ONLY one thing as far as I can tell: Sherlock.”

“You… want to shoot Sherlock?”

“Tempting as it is, if you actually kill Sherly locks, then there is NOTHING to leverage on the man.”

Sebastian tried to puzzle this one out and finally shrugged, “Ok, so will you tell me WHAT you are doing?”

“First of all, since as you MAY have noticed; Sherlock is brilliant at pissing people off…”

“Yeah, he was the witness for the prosecution and got put up for contempt.” Sebastian looked thoughtful, “Also i want to punch him- i mean, just because.”

Jim snickered at that, “You aren’t the only one…” he took a deep breath and went on, “So I've been planting a shit ton of evidence against him, and a LOT of people will help me- not that they know they are helping me, mostly: they just hate his guts.”

“... ok?”

“And you met my actor persona? Some of his acting jobs actually go back YEARS… well he’s going to testify against the dear curly haired lamb…”

“Uh...if you get into court won't people notice how much you look like ‘Jim Moriarty’...?”

Jim reached out tiredly and patted his cheek, “Of course they will. And I’m going to yank the rug out from under my traitorous fan spy’s options by claiming that I was an actor hired by the dear detective- and his brother- to pretend to be a criminal…”

Sebastian felt like he was missing a few pieces… “OK, i… I don't think i get it?”

Jim drummed his fingers on his leg and muttered, “I’ve done contract work for the people at Holmes’ level before- quite a bit, really. When governments want to keep their hands clean they hire people like me.”

“Got that…”

He adopted more of a lecturing tone- or one like the usual briefings, which was kind of surreal wince they were both sitting on the floor of Sebastian’s bedroom. “Politics at that level is… vicious. Everyone wants more power, everyone leveraging blackmail… even the implication that Holmes LET ME get to the bank, and the prison- during which we engineered a rather critical escape- and the crown jewels?”

Sebastian saw it suddenly, “Oh hell- it would look like he did it for his brother-wouldn't it?”

Jim snarled and his teeth bared in something that wasn't remotely a smile, “He had me in his fucking cells- and then this happened and I got arrested and didn't die in jail or anything… Why did he let me go? How did I get IN to all those places? And am i really an actor that Mycroft just set up as a pawn? Oh… he’ll be pulled nine ways at least trying to save his hide, all the while worrying about his baby brother…”

Sebastian leaned in as if pulled by a magnet, “Brilliant… and then what?”

“And then all the evidence of faked crimes, of Sherlock being a fraud- because Mycroft set it all up, don’t you know…”

“Won’t he just… set off his failsafes?”

Jim looked at him levelly, “That's the tricky part: In addition to fighting for his political life- and his brother’s actual one-he has to be convinced that there is no POINT to setting off those failsafes... and the one way to do THAT is if he thinks I’m dead.”


	15. Peace Talks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> About bloody time these two actually... anyway they talk some, things progress.

Sebastian looked at Jim Moriarty- a man who was clearly certifiable, not that he had any room to complain- and considered what manner of horrific plan he might have in mind to ‘make Mycroft think he was dead’.

Jim looked a bit uneasily at him, “what’s THAT look mean?”

“I am contemplating the way your brain works, and ‘think i’m dead’ and just how many ways THAT could go wrong…”

“It won’t go wrong! I’m a genius!”

“Yes, you are- and hell yes it will go wrong.”

Jim did that open and closed mouth thing, “what?”

“YOU are a genius, and i’m sure everything will work perfectly for you, and probably Holmes, and Sherlock …” Sebastian found himself shouting, “But what about the REST of us!”

“Err… what?”

He balled his fists up into his pajamas. “Given that you apparently have had NO idea how scared to death everyone was while you were locked up, or how suicidal i was, or the fact that you have a shit ton of people working for you that ARE NOT FUCKING GENIUSES, but CARE about you, you little shit!” Sebastian trailed off panting.

Jim was leaning well back and pulling the sheet around himself a bit more, “Ok… can you… not shout?”

Sebastian stared at him, “You… YOU…. are telling me not to shout? Mister screams at the top of his lungs and then politely asks for salt?”

Jim mumbled, “It bugs me when other people do it.”

Sebastian just stared at him. _He… looked rattled?_ _He’d pulled that sheet around pretty…_ Sebastian forced the tension out of his hands and shoulders and scooted over, “C’mere.”

Jim hesitantly leaned into him and Sebastian put his arm around him. 

After what felt like an eternity Jim mumbled, “My whole childhood was people screaming at each other: i try never to think about it.”

“Probably where you picked it up, huh?”

“... probably.”

“I’m serious, though, if you don't talk your plans out with at least a couple of trusted people- it's going to blow up when we don’t react right.”

“...probably.”

“So… um… do you want to actually give this whole relationship thing a shot?”

“...yeah, i mean...you… I’m serious that I would have had anyone else shot.” Jim added, “roof- sniper- that thing”

“And i honestly had no idea how it might look, especially since i called Quincy- he bitched me out for wrecking his sight line.”

“...good. Uh… so… um… what was going on?”

“He was there for security to make sure you didn’t start anything.” Sebastian shrugged, “And because Mycroft was around.”

“So basically the same reason Quincy was there.”

“Yup. anyway he kept an eye through the scope, but kept his hands off the trigger- eventually packed down… we were catching up a bit… he asked me if it was my shot on the concierge… and about one of the jobs…”

“You said.” Jim nodded.

“Told me i was an idiot-”

“-I'll kill him!-”

Sebastian squeezed Jim around the shoulder and chuckled, “For not realizing we were already dating.”

“...what?”

“The short form?” Sebastian rolled his eyes, “he’d asked if we were… well he basically asked if we were fucking, and i pointed out that i had a horrid crush on you and you’d rather firmly put me off.”

Jim grumbled, Sebastian didn't bother to ask what he meant and just continued. “When you texted; I said you were peeved and I had to get going.”

“I was a bit more than PEEVED!”

“And he asked if I needed to be brought in for my own safety or anything.”

Jim managed to look smug and offended at once.

“And i said i better bring you chocolate.”

Jim choked, “Oh you DID NOT!”

Sebastian hung his head, “yup.”

“My REP, Tiger!” Jim shoved at him- but he was laughing a bit. “So THEN what?”

“He said we were dating, i said we were not… and he told me i was worse than his sister who was LIVING with this girl for a year- flatmates- and worked up the nerve to ask her out?”

JIm nodded slowly, but he was grinning.

“And turned out her flatmate thought they’d been dating-”

Jim laughed, “probably for almost a year? Yeah, i’ve seen that.”

"So he asked if i could picture ANY of your other men getting an angry text, and their first response being to take you chocolate…”

He had to stop for a while while Jim laughed himself into gasping wheezes…

…

Jim finally wiped tears of laughter from his eyes and said, “If that wasn't the best… laugh i’ve had in… years i would have to kill him….”

“Don’t kill Dev, he invited me to his sister's wedding reception on Sunday.”

“Marrying that flatmate?”

“I assumed so? That reminds me I need to get a gift.”

“You can send a gift, but you can’t go- sorry.”

Sebastian blinked, “I can’t?”

“Mycroft will have it staked out.”

“You think Dev would tell him?”

“He MIGHT- i don't know him- but just knowing you two were chatting?”

Sebastian nodded slowly, “he did say he would give me until he got back to base before reporting me.”

“Too risky, sorry.” Jim shrugged.

Sebastian grinned, “Yeah, well he said not to bring my boyfriend because you were too recognizable and he couldn't cover that up anyway, so…”

“MYCROFT’S sniper said…” Jim stared at him a bit and then shook his head, “your friends are REALLY strange Sebastian.”

“Snipers and explosives experts and medical people- yeah.” Sebastian shrugged. “So… how about some food and… um… we call someone to pick all the shards of stuff out of the furnishings?”

“Yeah… so… i never…”

Sebastian raised an eyebrow, “you never what?”

“I never dated anyone… “

“EVER?!”

“Not… for real? I mean I did as an act…” Jim considered and nodded, “I think it's traditional for me to take you out to dinner?”

“I believe it is traditional to go out to dinner before shagging your date, yeah.”

Jim smirked, “Oh you think i’m that fast? What if I wanted to wait?”

Sebastian glanced at the framed photos of Roxie, “Well, you have a point there, sir, between your outfits as Roxie and your usual suits I figure it takes until the second date to get everything off of you and hung up properly…”

Jim was obviously feeling better because he smacked him in the shoulder and grinned. Then he wagged a finger at him. “Then get dressed up, because if we’re actually DATING I want to take you someplace nice… I’ll call security.” he hesitated, “and the housekeeping staff. 

“Now carry me back to my bedroom,” He said imperiously, “i don’t have any shoes!”

Sebastian scooped him up and carried him back to his bedroom, “we… will need to actually sit down and talk more at some point.”

Jim muttered into his closet, “My… background is not conducive to a nice night out.”

“Kind of figured. But we can’t put it off forever- PTSD triggers if nothing else.”

Jim slid his eyes sideways and then his voice dipped down into a cross between a purr and a growl, “Any triggers about my teasing you relentlessly in an expensive restaurant and then bringing you back to one of my more _private_ flats and tying you to the bed?”

Sebastian whined at the mental image and then managed to choke out, “No, no, and probably not- just… nothing that…”

“We’ll go over safe words and I'll make sure you’re comfy…” Jim licked his lips, “Now go get dressed before i jump you right here and now- you wouldn't enjoy it as much, i bite when i’m hungry.”

Sebastian had the sneaking suspicion he bit when he wasn't hungry too.


	16. Dinner and a Dance, Mein Herr?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dinner... and a dance... and a private dance...

Sebastian had expected someplace nice but not very public, instead they went to a VERY fancy restaurant, with semi private booths, and FAR too many people…

“Is it wise for me to be seen with you this publicly?” Sebastian asked, trying not to look directly at the MP sitting with a very nice looking mistress- not his wife- who was openly staring at them.

“Once you told me that the Icicle had you on a hot list- and had figured out just who took a few of those shots?” Jim replied casually as he sat down- probably only Sebastian noticed that he timed it for when he was angled away from any possible lip reading.

Sebastian glanced around again- this booth was the MOST private of the semi private booths, for all that everyone had seen them be escorted to this one… as long as he was careful no one would be in a position to lip read…

“Bugs?” Sebastian mouthed at Jim.

Jim just smirked, “not here- too many important people eat here, however just to be safe i had one of my people do a sweep.”

“Ok…”

“However I am definitely not talking business…” Jim somehow had gotten one of his shoes off and was running his foot up Sebastian's ankle...he stopped when he got to the holster, “Niiice- hadn't seen that one.”

Sebastian grinned, “Bet you missed more than THAT one.”

“Oh? I guess I'll just have to search you thoroughly when we get home.”

And before Sebastian could think of a reply they were ordering dinner and ...

Jim tortured him for the rest of the meal: innuendo, hand gestures… when he made taking a simple bite off his fork nearly cause Sebastian to bite THROUGH his own fork, he realized just how bad tonight was going to be…

And unfortunately that just seemed to make him harder.

Jim was smirking, “you are altogether too easy to tease, Sebastian.”

“Only for-” Sebastian cut off as he locked eyes with a startled man who had just passed across the line of sight from their booth.

“What is it?” Jim didn't sound or look concerned, but he pulled his foot back.

Sebastian went back to finishing up his meal. “That… was a business contact who… I had no idea he was in England and none of the men had him on a report…”

Jim politely told the waiter they would be skipping dessert and then once he was gone asked Sebastian for a report on the fellow.

Sebastian gave him the concise summary: “- so he could be working for just about anyone.”

“Annoying,” Jim shrugged. “I will suggest we give him a chance to either catch up to us, or leave us alone.”

Sebastian nodded as Jim texted in the update to his driver and- one hoped- extra security.

They ran into a slight issue when they went to leave, since Jim apparently meant to use the facilities.

“Sebastian,” Jim said without moving his lips in the slightest, “why are you following me to the men’s room?”

“Security?” Sebastian answered quietly.

Jim rolled his eyes.

Sebastian was waiting near the sinks when- just as he’d feared- ‘Sergei’ walked in.

“Did you want something, Sergei?” Sebastian made sure he spoke loudly enough for Jim to hear him.

“Yes, to speak to you- and to your friend.” Sergei bared his teeth in something remotely approximating a smile.

“You wanted to talk to me,” Sebastian raised an eyebrow, “so talk.”

“You are here with Mister Chelyadnin…” he tilted his head, “Who i know is not Moriarty… It would be sad if too many people knew this.”

Sebastian suddenly remembered that Sergei had worked for one of the groups that Jim had dealt with as ‘Mister Moriarty’s accountant’.

“I didn’t think you knew his accountant on sight, Sergei, but what’s your point?” Sebastian knew as long as Jim could hear enough he would follow everything… heck he was probably texting security and a clean up crew.

“So… i could be very valuable; especially now that the little accountant is pretending to be a big man.”

Jim walked out of the stall softly, and went to the sink, “Problem, Sebastian?” Jim’s voice had picked up a distinctly Muscovite accent- subtle, but there.

Before Sebastian could answer Sergei started talking in Ukrainian. Sebastian was by no means fluent in the language- its overlap with Russian kept throwing him off, and he wasn't THAT fluent in Russian- but he understood enough to follow the general conversation.

Sergei made ingratiating noises at Jim- pardon, ‘Viktor Chelyadnin’.

Jim was unimpressed.

Sergei made out that he was a much more important person- and much more effective combatant- than he actually was.

Jim more or less told him to drop off a resume with HR.

...And Sergei made a move for a weapon, whether to show off or attack, Sebastian didn't care.

Sebastian snatched the knife out of his hand. “Were you being rude to my charge, Sergei?”

He looked shocked, and hesitated just for a moment… and past his shoulder, Sebastian saw Jim’s cover drop away briefly. Jim shook his head and made a small gesture across his throat… and backed up to lean against the sink.

Sergei went on the attack, and Sebastian backpedaled enough to get him further from Jim- who was looking rather intent....

Something about the combination of adrenaline, pent up frustration, and Jim watching, tripped off the vicious streak that Sebastian usually held well in check. He ducked under Sergei’s attempted strike and hit him in the nerve cluster right at the shoulder. Sergei gasped and lost a bit of his balance and Sebastian hit him hard in the sweet spot- the one where your diaphragm just… stops for a few.

Sergei went down hard, trying and failing to gasp.

Jim made a breathy noise that went right to Sebastian’s cock before clearing his throat and saying, “Shall we help the poor man out to the car? He seems to have had a bit too much...something.”

“Too much ego,” Sebastian muttered, but he got Sergei levered up off the floor and one of his arms over his shoulder. Jim expertly frisked him, Sebastian made sure to control both of Sergei’s hands, and they “helped” the poor man out to the car.

He was breathing again by the time they got the door shut- honestly having him upright probably saved his life, not that he was going to appreciate that.

Jim said something to him- it sounded like ‘job interview’ to Seb- but whatever it was Sergei settled down enough to be hooded and cuffed (albeit still kept at gunpoint) until they got to...some sort of building that looked like flats?

Jim was keeping up the accent, but his Viktor body language was clearly cracking as he had Sebastian escort Sergei down to the basement.

One of Moriarty’s people was already there- much to Sebastian’s surprise it was Murphy.

Jim held up a hand, “Murphy is on guard detail tonight.” Then he went over to a directors’ chair up near the wall and sat down.

“He is?” Sebastian looked at Murphy- who didn't look surprised at all, and asked, “I thought I was?”

“Don’t be silly, Tiger, how could you be on bodyguard detail when we were on a date?”

“Seb is always on guard detail- he’s a mother hen.” Murphy rolled his eyes, “now, unless you have weird taste in threesomes I'm guessing this guy started something?”

‘This guy’ was beginning to realize he was not getting the kind of job interview he wanted and started putting up an argument- Sebastian kicked his knee in.

Jim inhaled sharply, “oooh yeah… dinner and a dance show…”

Murphy took up position near the chair Jim was sitting in. “Care to fill me in?”

Jim smirked, “He started something; Sebastian was utterly delicious, and I wanted to get someplace I could appreciate it?”

Sebastian felt like a few clues hit him- about like being hit with a sledgehammer. “You… Want to see me ‘interview’ Sergei?”

Jim just smiled, which was answer enough. 

Sebastian took off his jacket and carefully removed his tie. Murphy was just leaning up against the wall, but at least Seb didn't have to worry about the guy getting near Jim…  
He pulled off the hood and cut the bindings off of Sergei. “Pity about your leg, but if you want to even it up I could give you your knife back…”

Sergei went for him- apparently managing despite the damage to his knee. _Jim wanted a show?_ Sebastian played and feinted and threw the guy around a bit… when Sergei was picking himself up from the wall he glanced at Jim, “Keep it bare handed? Or ?”

Jim was smiling- that wicked smile that said bloody murder and made Sebastian feel a bit light headed. “As you like Sebastian, but i’m never adverse to a bit of knife work…”

Murphy drawled calmly from where he was leaning against the wall, “Well, be careful with that- you don’t know where he’s been.”

“Oh and Sergei?” Jim chuckled, “I _am_ the real Moriarty… and the only thing you are good for is entertainment…”

Sergei made the mistake of trying to go for Jim and Sebastian had his knife in hand before he thought about it: Sergei’s momentum carried him a few more feet to fall neatly dead- well, dying- at Jim’s feet; the blood pulsing weakly out around Sebastian’s knife.

“Well, that’s neat enough,” Murphy nodded. “Nice job, easy to clean up.”

“Professional instincts and training,” Sebastian sighed, “sorry sir, i know you were hoping for a bit more show…”

Jim very literally stepped on Sergei and grabbed Sebastian by the shirt, “That was lovely, and we need to go upstairs because one: I would completely traumatize Murphy-”

“Impossible.” Murphy said with some amusement.

“And two: i am far too important to be fucking on the concrete in a basement.”

Sebastian glanced at Murphy- who mostly looked amused- “You got clean up and security handled?”

“Yup, no worries- you two have fun.” he pulled his shades down with one finger and glanced at Jim, “and Boss? Seriously you aren’t going to traumatize me, but it would probably kill the Colonel of embarrassment if i started critiquing.”

Sebastian very firmly said, “Yes, yes it would.” and then offered his arm, “Shall we?”

Jim shot him a look from beneath his lashes that … it was Roxie, and yet it wasn't, but it was definitely lethally attractive. “Don't forget your jacket and tie.”

Sebastian got his things and Jim took them upstairs. “The building is being rehabbed into Luxury flats-its a present for Franklin: he doesn't know he owns it.”

“Nice…”

“Naturally the rehab and all will conceal any evidence.”

“Of course…”

“And one of my cover identities has a flat here…one of the early buy-ins” he let them into a fairly large flat- completely finished, if a bit boring looking: It had the kind of plastic prettiness of a hotel room.

“Looks like the display model…”

Jim shrugged, “the important part is that it has a very sturdy king size bed. And the luxury bath options.”

Sebastian was starting to say something when Jim ordered him to put down his jacket and tie, and hold his arms out- he did by reflex. “Uh. ok? Why?”

“... i do like an obedient man…” Jim made that sound lewd as he inspected Sebastian carefully. “Huh, you actually kept the blood off your shirt and pants- i thought there would be at least a spot.”

“Might have gotten a tiny bit on my shoes? I made a point of wiping them on the work mat downstairs… and I wiped my hands…”

Jim was suddenly RIGHT up against him, “So… we had a mildly interrupted shower last time…”

Sebastian’s libido elbowed its way front and center and he put his hands carefully on Jim’s hips, “We got INTERRUPTED with you sitting on my lap in the bedroom, but we could back up to the shower and start over…”

Jim smirked evilly and pulled him to the …

“Holy FUCK this bathroom is huge!”

“Luxury bath model.” Jim grinned, “top of the line available, with the jacuzzi bath and the ‘rainforest shower’ options.”

Sebastian eyed the bathtub- big enough to be called a small pool as far as he was concerned- and pointed out that they would both fit…

“For right now? Shower… then I'm tying you to the bed.”

Sebastian stripped, and watched avidly as Jim slowly took off and hung up everything to steam… and then Jim backed him into a shower with his hand flat on his chest. “I am going to ruin you…”

“Hell, you did THAT ages ago…” Sebastian cursed the breathiness of his voice but it was taking all his willpower to not just jump the man.

It was supposed to be a quick shower, but Jim turned “washing off” and “washing his hair” into a strip tease worthy performance… By the time he finished Sebastian was positively HURTING from how hard he was.

“Maybe we should take care of that?” Jim growled and flicked a finger….!

Sebastian swallowed hard, “careful, sir- you almost DID.”

Jim grinned- that was a very, very, bad, evil grin- and leaned up against Sebastian, pressing him against the wall. “Hands on the wall, soldier…” Jim licked his lips and leaned up and started whispering- almost purring- “I performed Liza’s Cabaret routine, ‘Mein Herr’ at the club once… it was the only time i ever performed in a wig that wasn’t blonde…” Jim licked his lips again, “I used a heavier hand with the makeup but it was far too close to my own appearance…”

Sebastian was tense as a bowstring and trying to hear him over the roar of water and what he suspected was the roar of hormones. He’d watched the movie of course- hadn’t Jim told him too?- and the idea of JIM up on stage…. He whined.

“Of course it was just me… and the chair… and Liza’s costume…. Far too close to my hair, which is why I never distributed photos…”

Jim ran his fingers slowly up Sebastian’s chest, “~Farewell my lieber herr~ it was a fine affair~” he half sang it and half growled and Sebastian’s whole body was vibrating and he could feel each finger pressing on his chest.

“Look at me.”

Sebastian dragged his eyes down and locked with dark eyes and a tongue just licking the corner of his lips.

“Of course it's dangerous to do the chair work…” Jim started rocking gently forward and back, just BRUSHING against him and humming the tune- Sebastian could picture the pumping hips on the chair and…. _Oh God!_

“But I do... what I can…” _Jim’s fingers_ … “inch by inch.” Jim was breathing into his ear, “step by step…”

Sebastian tried to swallow as Jim- right here, leaning against him, his fingers tapping and crawling on his shoulders and his voice in his ear, blurred with the images of Liza Minelli on stage, and Roxie on the stage of The Queen’s Hidden Lounge…

“~mile by mile~…” Jim purred and then very softly, “Come for me.”

Sebastian did.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Viktor Chelyadnin is Jim's "accountant alias" from mickie's stories  
> https://archiveofourown.org/works/11513172/chapters/27655491 (first appearance of Viktor Chelyadnin) a Sheriarty challenge
> 
> https://archiveofourown.org/series/1035446 re use of name and general concept in a Mycroft/moriarty  
> .........
> 
> The performance of Mein Herr Jim is referring to is detailed in Chapter 2 of InnerSpectrum 's "The Life You’re Living, The Life You’d Like"  
> https://archiveofourown.org/works/24189973/chapters/58552468
> 
> Liza's performance can be found HERE: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lxmz3RcNNBE&feature=youtu.be


	17.  BDSM for SAS

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> some very much needed discussion of PTSD triggers and past history (not graphic)  
> plus sex and never cook in the nude.

Honestly Sebastian didn't have any idea how he got into the bedroom. He more or less reoriented himself already on the bed with Jim looking down at him the way a group of men who have been eating MREs for months looked at steak and beer.

“Just so you know, sir, I draw the line at you actually using a knife and fork…”

Jim blinked, and then grinned, “really? I was only planning on ropes, but I’m pretty good with a knife …”

Sebastian considered and sat up slowly, “Maybe… we need to have that chat about PTSD triggers sooner rather than later?”

The smile wiped off Jim’s face fast and he sat down on the bed, and then sprawled on top of Sebastian, “sure,” he said quietly lying across him, “Talk?”

“I’m pretty sure my brain just makes fizzing noises when you do this…”

Jim snickered.

“Uh… I was… rather extensively… hurt.”

“What was it you said to me, Tiger?” Jim said softly, “been there, done that.”

Sebastian nodded, “So if you actually want to try tying me up…” he considered, “Ropes… should be ok as long as they don't put strain on me…”

“You said that- stress positions and… suspension… “

Sebastian shivered faintly as memories hissed like sand - Jim petted him and he settled. “Under NO circumstances do you cover my nose or mouth while i’m restrained… er… kissing should be ok i think?”

Jim blinked twice, paled slightly, and swallowed, “Oookay, yeah, me neither.”

Sebastian reached up and pulled the man close. “We’re a pair, aren’t we?”

“Well of course! You with that utterly YUMMY submissive nature…”

“Err… pardon?”

“If you didn’t know i was a dom…” Jim laughed

“Back up and try again? Like I said, fizzing noises…” Sebastian smiled apologetically and ran his hands down Jim’s back: Jim arched into it purring.

After a bit Jim shook himself and settled back across Sebastian's body...which was… well… fizzing noises.

“So have you DONE rope play?”

“No.”

“Well… what kind of bondage play have you done?”

Sebastian considered… “Holding someone’s wrists? Uh… and… there was one girl who liked… blindfolds?”

Jim stared at him, “that's IT?!”

“Jim… Sir… If you want the party animals you got the wrong guy… i like sex, and i’ve had a fair bit of it- more than a fair bit, really- but....”

“You…” Jim sounded stunned, “You fell into calling me ‘Sir’ again, obeyed orders without hesitation, KEPT your damn hands on the wall...i… thought you…”

“You thought I what?”

“You’ve NEVER been tied up for sex?”

Sebastian swallowed hard, “not… voluntarily, no.”

Jim stared at him. “... you?” he asked quietly.

Sebastian knew this would probably have to come up at some point- he’d just hoped to put it off. ”I’m… informed it's a fairly standard way of trying to break a prisoner…” he said, very happy that his voice stayed level.

“And… you were going… to let me tie you up?!” JIm’s voice went up several pitches

“It… sounded good when you suggested it?”

“Has anyone told you that you may be just a touch insane?”

Sebastian laughed, “yes. I’ve also been told in no uncertain terms that I have it pretty bad for you and…. Well… my upper brain tends to shut down and the lower one just goes, ‘Sir, yes sir!’ whenever you suggest anything….”

“Ooooh sweet Jesus I have a bondage virgin?” Jim flopped back down over him and started … petting… parts of him. “I have a bondage virgin who is a natural sub… I have a combat trained, muscular, GORGEOUS, bondage virgin, natural sub in my bed…. Remind me to go to church because I owe someone a novena or a new church roof or something.”

Sebastian tried to say something but Jim was doing really REALLY nice things with his hands and… not so much fizzing noises as sort of ocean sounds- anyway he was just gonna lie here and purr.

“Who knows?”

“...Who knows what?” Sebastian finally managed to ask.

“Any of what happened to you?”

Sebastian pulled Jim in and started nosing into his neck and …  _ God he smelled good _ . “Some of it? My whole crew. More of it? The psych boys probably? Maybe? All of it? Nobody.”

“...but you don’t mind the IDEA of me… tying you to the bed and teasing you?”

“You teased me all dinner… i mean, i would RATHER just jump you and… but no the idea doesn’t bother me.”

“Do you understand safe words?”

“I’ve heard of them…”

Jim dragged a hand down his face and muttered something about… forgiving the doctor?

“What?”

“Didn’t think to ask about penicillin,” Jim muttered, “Just like i never thought to ask if you knew… ANYTHING about BDSM since you were going along so nicely.” He stopped petting and laying on him, “A safe word is a word that means ‘stop’ because a lot of folks say ‘no’ and don't actually mean it.”

Sebastian nodded, “like , ‘oh my god, no… oh stop i can't stand it’? Except they don't want you to stop.”

“Exactly! “ Jim beamed at him. “So we use words that don’t come up in normal… play… like yelling Aardvark.”

Sebastian pictured someone yelling aardvark during sex and cracked up.

“The simplest is color codes: green for it's all good, yellow for hold up a minute or… i need to adjust, and red means stop.”

“Fair enough.” Sebastian snickered, “Aardvark...:”

Jim grinned, “or refrigerator, or whatever- if you’re at a party or a club they often have a club wide safe word posted… but most people have their own.”

“Do you?”

“I usually use color codes… but… to be honest the only time i’ve played submissive was when it was a role, and the codes were what… what my cover identity would use?”

“That makes sense.”

“Let me do a bit of -much lighter than i had planned- rope work, and you can tell me if you are alright?”

“I’m sure it will be fine- you… well unless you start throwing dishware.”

Jim held up a hand, “I swear, no throwing stuff until you are untied.”

“I don’t think it will bother me,.” Sebastian shrugged, “I trust you.”

Jim got the oddest look on his face and then drew a hand gently over Sebastian's cheek, down his neck and across his chest, “You say the STUPIDEST things, Tiger…” but he sounded flattered.

Jim got off the bed and came back with what looked for all the world like rappelling rope- fairly colorful rappelling rope. He started asking about positioning, and kept rather worriedly asking him for a color- it was positively sweet.

Wasn't exactly sexy, mind you, but it was sweet.

Jim had tied his arms out to the bedposts, but each of those ties had a quick release loop handy- it definitely helped any nerves to know that… but as ropes just… KEPT winding over him…

“Uh, it’s” Jim looked up worriedly, but Sebastian continued, “It's all green and fine and… um… i just don't get what you’re doing?”

Jim grinned evilly- and Sebastian’s traitorous dick perked right up. “Ah, you don't see what this has to do with restraint?”

“No? I mean… no?”

Jim started tugging on a few of the ropes and… everything…  _ tightened _ ? Sebastian frowned and wriggled a bit and Jim stopped.

“Color?”

“It's fine… i mean green… just trying to… figure it out?”

“If the ropes ever get TOO tight, or you lose circulation anywhere- and you shouldn't- tell me.” Sebastian nodded and Jim went back to winding ropes around him and kept… tugging?... and… the ropes… tight wasn't the right word, it felt… it felt snug… and they were…  _ oh GOD that felt good… _

He heard “color?” from somewhere far away and blinked…”this is comfortable.”

“...Oh Lord have mercy- he’s a rope bunny…”

Sebastian tried to ask but couldn't help but chuckle at the idea of bunnies- it was funny for some reason- and then the ropes tightened again and Jim’s fingers were dancing across his body, lightly, and there was a cool sensation dripping across him and the cool sensation got warm…

... and oh GOD he wanted and he tried to arch up into the hand but the ropes squeezed him and he moaned and he roared and Jim- or was it Roxie?- was laughing and humming a song… 

and Jim was scratching down his chest and pinching at him, and there was more cool liquid and then a warm mouth...

_ Oh GOD Jim’s mouth!  _ And he was begging

He was begging and what the hell was pride…

And Jim took him down to the root and then the BASTARD took his mouth away and left his dick in the cool air and started teasing and petting and tugging on the ropes…

And he was kissing Jim and Jim's hands were teasing and then they tugged on the ropes and he was spread further and he couldn't even wriggle, and Jim held his hand JUST touching …

“Do you WANT something, Sebastian?”

And he tried to find words and he thought he said “everything” and Jim was biting at his shoulder and  _ I always KNEW Jim was a biter _ and Jim’s hand finally, FINALLY! Started moving and they were both being held together and…

!

Sebastian was fairly certain he was screaming as he came.

…

There were still ropes around his torso, and his legs, but he could move… and Jim was rubbing his arms. 

“Hey, you back with me?”

“Wow…” Sebastian tried to blink focus back but he was still seeing little flashes of light.

“I’m going to leave the body harness tie on, but I've untied your arms and ankles…”

Sebastian did, in fact , find he could move his arms...and he rolled slightly to the side and all the ropes around his body hugged him.

Jim drew his fingers down Sebastian's back, “Oh the NOISES you make…”

“...knew you bit…” Sebastian muttered as he put his arms around him.

“Did you?”

“Mmm-Hmm.”

“Go to sleep you idiot.”

…

Sebastian woke up from the best sleep he’d had in years, to find Jim Moriarty staring intently directly into his eyes from inches away. The hair on the back of his neck stood straight up. “Sir?”

“I was waiting for you to get up.” Moriarty continued boring holes in him with his eyes, “so i could have breakfast, and tea.”

Sebastian blinked and translated that to,  _ ‘i was staring at you to make you get up and make me food out of sheer self-preservation’ _

“Right!” he carefully let go of Jim and started to get up…  _ rope? No rope…only a bit of rope... _

“I got most of the rope off you when you fell asleep.”

Sebastian shook himself loose from the rest of the ropes, and went out to get Jim food before he really DID get a knife and fork. The kitchen was fully stocked, so he found an apron- grease splatters being nasty on bare skin- and was making breakfast when he heard the main door.

Sebastian picked the pistol up off the counter- he hadn't been such an idiot as to go out of the bedroom without it- and didn't relax until he saw Quincy.

“WARN, me, Quince! You could have been shot… worse, i might have burned breakfast.”

Quincy was staring at him…”You are cooking breakfast naked in an apron?”

“I am cooking breakfast in an apron, because naked I could be spattered with grease in very sensitive spots, and my clothes… are somewhere.”

“You look like bad porn.”

Jim’s amused voice, “No, he looks like GREAT porn...I especially like his ass hanging out- it looks firm and-”

“TMI sir,” Quincy shook his head, “Also i have seen his ass- I’ve seen everyone in the unit’s ass… decontamination showers aren’t sexy though.”

Sebastian commented, “You do find out who violated regs to get a tattoo, though.” he handed Jim his first cup of tea.

Jim nodded approvingly and sat down at the kitchen table to… apparently watch his ass: Sebastian went back to cooking.

“Anything to report?” Jim asked after he’d had enough tea to be civil.

“Yes, sir, have it here- also Tiernan said to tell you ‘they think they found Mister Over Enthusiastic’ - whatever that means- and they want you to confirm it?”

Sebastian asked, “Mister Over Enthusiastic?” and put a plate of sugar disguised as breakfast down in front of jim. “Quince… you want your usual?”

“Oh, could you?”

“Yeah.” Sebastian set about making two breakfasts for people who don’t have an addiction to syrup.

Jim was apparently reading the report and eating so Seb waited until Quincy and he were both seated with their food. “Who is ‘Mister Over Enthusiastic?”

“One of the interrogation team.” Jim muttered, “and yeah- that's him.” he waved the screen at Seb: Seb took it and flipped through several images… as always you expect a monster to look like one, and they don’t.

“Can i take care of that or do you want him brought in?”

Jim looked thoughtful, and then grinned- “he’s got a clean bill of health….”

“I would assume so,” Sebastian frowned.

“Maybe you could show off your knife work?” Jim licked the syrup off his fork, “you know as opposed to Sergei where we DIDN’T know his health status…”

Quincy looked back and forth rapidly, “Is this some weird kind of flirting?”

They both said, “yes” almost in chorus- Sebastian was starting to grin.

Quincy just put a hand over his face, “Great… you’ve corrupted Sebastian.”

“What?” Sebastian protested, “I always liked showing off…”

“You liked showing off your sniping,” Quincy snorted, “You were always that kind of ‘showy by being efficient’ with a knife.” he glanced over at Jim, “i assume you don't want to bring in any of the actual knife guys?”

Jim looked curious, “i doubt it, since i don't want an excuse to fuck them, but who would you suggest if fucking them wasn't involved?”

Quincy managed to turn a few shades redder despite his darker coloring- Sebastian flushed pink: Jim grinned at both of them and burst out laughing.

“I’ll go work on something in my office… let me know if he CAN be picked up alive, but don't take any unnecessary chances, ok? If you need to drop him at a distance just bring me photos.”

He walked off to the flat’s office room and shut the door.

Quincy looked over at Sebastian and shook his head, “well… congrats on FINALLY getting together with the boss- even if i still have trouble believing it.”

“It...is complicated.” Sebastian admitted, “but i think it will work out.”

“Well… you both…” Quincy hesitated before settling on, “were interrogated.”

“Captured, held prisoner, and tortured,” Sebastian corrected quietly. He hesitated, “Some notable differences, but...then we both seem to have some… issues from before that too.”

Quincy very carefully- while looking at a small bit of sausage as though it was fascinating- asked, “Given how aggressive the Boss seems to be outside of bed, and the number of bite marks on you, i assume you either talked about things or… it wasn't an issue?”

“We talked briefly… AND it wasn't an issue.” Sebastian cleared his throat, “so… Quince… you got into some of the more.. Um...not so mainstream stuff… right?”

Quincy looked up at him, “yeah?”

“Safewords and stuff?”

Quincy looked a bit alarmed, “Uh, with your background man that might be a bit much-”

“It was… green... And he kept checking…”

Quincy was blinking rapidly, “Oh dear lord, of course the boss is into that- why did i not know the boss was into that? We need to get you a few books… uh… what did you want to ask me?”

“What’s a rope bunny? Because I think I remember him saying i was one…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://definedictionarymeaning.com/topic/40510/rope-bunny


	18. He Had It Coming

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is a longer than my usual chapter, and there are some TW because we deal with one Malcolm Warner (From InnerSpectrum's version of Jim's interrogation) and Sebastian's PTSD.

Quincy insisted they stop at two REALLY interesting - and slightly terrifying- stores to get books, on the way to the meeting. Sebastian tried not to GAWK at what the shops were selling, but judging from the smothered snickering of the sales staff he figured he had failed.

He did pick up some flavored lube, along with all the books (and two videos) Quincy insisted on.

“And I need to read these?” Sebastian sighed after they had left the second shop. “When do i need to read these?”

“Before you do anything too non-vanilla again.” Quincy said firmly, “and… seriously, you… you need to sit down and talk in DETAIL with the boss about stuff before you play with anything that might trip over the PTSD- either of you.”

Fortunately they got to the meeting before Sebastian died of embarrassment.

UNfortunately, everyone at the meeting asked about the logos on the bags. Sebastian finally glared at people and said, “FINE! I spent the night with the boss and… he’s into some stuff i don't have any experience with-”

Murphy snickered, but Franklin just said, “I had the impression you had a fair amount of experience, Moran?”

“Doesn't mean i tried everything.” Sebastian very deliberately copied Jim’s ‘teeth baring not smile’ at them, “and since we BOTH have PTSD triggers i figured i should do some research.”

Everyone dropped it- luckily- and went back to talking about this Warner guy. No one knew WHAT he’d been responsible for, since the only thing the boss had said was that he was ‘over enthusiastic’, but since Jim had singled this ONE guy out? Everyone figured it was bad.

They all agreed they wanted to pick him up alive and in good shape for the boss- which was tricky: killing him would be easy, kidnapping him without too many alarms, not so much.

They were tossing ideas back and forth- the best one so far was trying to take him when he got home, the way the SIS boys had tried to get Sebastian- and everyone was getting fairly frustrated when Harris cleared his throat and looked up from his book: “You done playing fantasy league kidnappers yet?”

“You have a BETTER idea?” huffed Tiernan.

Harris put a bookmark in his book, “he goes to a club to try to pick up girls.”

“Yeah?” Quincy nodded, “it was in several of our ideas.”

“Get one of the girls that works with us, have her throw some rohypnol in his drink and have her ‘go home with him in a cab’… if he isn't out enough she can dose him some more once he’s in the cab, and we just loop the cameras.” he shrugged, “Girls always check their drinks for stuff like that; Guys not so much.”

Several of them tried to argue the idea, but it had the value of simplicity and low risk, so… 

...

It worked perfectly: Given his usual ‘hunting grounds’ these days they only needed to loop or break a few local cameras, he staggered out with a pretty girl and got into one of the Boss’ cabs, and got given a bit more sedative… 

The girl got out and walked away in another part of town -rather a bit richer…

And Malcolm Warner ended up in a small cell outside of London.

…

Jim came in from whatever acting job he was doing as ‘Richard Brook’, looking all adorable…

“I swear to GOD I’m going to have that director strapped to a chair and forced to watch 27 hours of decent-” he cut off blinking at Sebastian and Rohaan.

Rohaan just smiled politely, “You’ll want to go shower and change, sir.” and handed him the photo of Warner in the cell.

The smile that crept over Jim’s face was absolutely NOT in character for ‘Richard Brook’ and Sebastian simultaneously felt a shiver of apprehension, and a bit turned on.

“How long has he been awake?”

Rohaan considered, “probably REALLY awake about three hours- he was groggily awake for a bit before that.”

“Tell his guards to be as obnoxious as they can with sound and lights and…” Jim sighed, “I’d love to make him wait for a few days…”

Sebastian considered, “why don’t you?”

“Hmm?”

“You film your bit when?”

“Two days… from now: Tiger you are a genius.”

“Tell us what you want and… we’ll record it, and you just concentrate on your acting, ok?” Sebastian kissed him gently on the cheek.

Jim grabbed his shirt and hauled him in, “Oh i need LOTS of stress relief, Sebie, if i’m not gonna kill that director- he really NEEDS to be stabbed a few times, i could get the rest of the actors to cover for me I’m sure…”

Rohaan just chuckled, “Well you two have fun. As to this character; anything specific? Or just mess with him?”

“Don’t let him get enough sleep, and… see if he can spend a few hours strapped to a REALLY bad for your back straight board?”

Rohaan gave him a nod, and then gave Sebastian a firm ‘you take care of him’ glare, and went out.

Jim muttered something about washing off the stink of bad directors and Sebastian got food started, and soon enough they were sitting down for a cozy meal…

“When the hell did I get this domestic?” Sebastian said quietly and shook his head.

“According to Murphy, Quincy, and Neal? Sometime before they ever met you.”

“What?”

“Murphy, in specific, told me point blank while… while you were away? That you were the ‘settle down sort’.”

Sebastian grumbled, “No one ever told ME… although compared to Murphy and Donald-” Sebastian sighed, “God i miss Donald- crazy idiot.”

Jim smiled a bit sadly, “He was a good guard, really, but the way he kept trying to drink himself to death on his off time…”

“Yeah, well…” Sebastian shook himself a bit, “Right, so am i actually shooting a director once you’re done with this part? Or is that just stress relief?”

“Maybe two warning shots?”

Sebastian hesitated- that sounded familiar… _AHA_! “Into his head? He pops gum?”

“Very GOOD!” Jim beamed at him.”he has it coming… although in actual fact if things keep up like this, no...he’ll shoot himself in the foot with his attitude. If he gets any worse though he’s fair game.”

They went to bed, and Sebastian curled around him, “You… don't actually have as high a libido as you pretend, do you?”

“Hmm?”

“You talk a good game- and you enjoy it when you do- but…”

Jim rolled over and looked sort of thoughtful, “Does it bother you?”

“Mostly I worry that you’re mad at me? Or losing interest?”

“Never that, Tiger…” he ran a hand down his chest. “Ok… to be bluntly honest I prefer curling up with you- it's novel. i’ve had lots of SEX but i never had anyone i trusted enough to… sleep with? I mean really? And it wasn’t a role…”

“As long as you aren't pushing me away.”

“Never.” Then Jim considered, “Also… i’m used to… well, bondage mostly- or even more hardcore- and i wanted to give you a chance to read everything and…” he muttered under his breath, “i didn’t want to scare you off.”

Sebastian tried to picture Jim scaring him off and laughed, “Sir? When you get scary my hair stands on end and so does my dick- you're not scaring me off so much as on… but i like cuddling with you too, in case you couldn't tell.”

“So what would YOU want to do tonight?”

“Same thing we do every night?” Sebastian hesitated, “that's a quote-”

“Pinky and the Brain, yeah.” Jim snorted, “Mindless stupidity and i’ve seen every episode.”

Sebastian pulled Jim in close and started kissing him and kissing his way down that gorgeous neck. 

“No marks where it shows..” Jim sounded a bit breathy.

“Of course not.”

Sebastian worked his way down Jim’s body, loving the way he reacted. If he really hadn't had many partners he could TRUST then having someone… well, this close and out of his control? It would be novel…

Eventually- after ignoring the snarled threats and imprecations to hurry up- he got down to a VERY interesting part of Jim’s anatomy. “Hello there, gorgeous…” Sebastian said and then looked up Jim’s body and grinned.

“If you don’t HURRY up and DO-” Jim cut off when Sebastian put his mouth to work.

Sebastian enjoyed immensely the surprised noises, followed by the unrestrained groans and moans as he put a skill to work that APPARENTLY the boss hadn’t known he had…

It didn't take long before Jim was saying some things that were about equal parts scary and …. Fascinating: “Oh my GOD how did i not know you could do this?! I would have had you chained under my desk… fuck your sniping ski- Oooooooooooh yeah…” Jim’s fingers dug into his hair, “-on your resume and i would have had to fight off half the-” and then a bit later it was just variations of “yes” and “Fuck!” and Jim was snarling something incoherently threatening and then he came with an open mouthed gasp…

Sebastian sat up smugly and rinsed his mouth.

“You… you BASTARD…” Jim panted.

“My parents were married,” Sebastian said- failing entirely to look and sound anything but pleased with himself. He pulled himself up and pulled Jim in, directing his hand down, “A little help?”

Jim glared at him. “No one EVER gets the last word with me Tiger, unless I let them!” and Jim shoved him back on the bed and…. Proved that Sebastian wasn’t the only one with hidden talents.

Sebastian fell asleep to Jim’s muttering about chaining him to various office furniture.

…*...

Sebastian tried to take a turn guarding Warner- it was a bit eerie: everyone was dressed in what could only be called IRA standard- including face coverings- and apparently the rule was only Irish accents in the man’s hearing range. Sebastian couldn't manage an Irish accent to save his life, so he mostly shut up, banged on the door, flipped lights, and helped drag the man around.  
  


Warner mostly snarled anti-Irish slurs, and a good bit of British superiority crap when he wasn’t gagged. The fact that he was still able to put up a fight, and give his captors that kind of attitude just proved to Sebastian that this was… play acting, not… not like it had been….

But even knowing that, when he had to help pull him down from having his arms tied overhead Sebastian had to go out and have a bit of fresh air....

Just a quick break…

Then Murphy came and got him to get food.

It had been a bit odd to find out that Murphy and Quincy- who both normally had a very metro London type of accent- could sound like they stepped out of an interview with Sinn Fein: it did make it a bit more believable that his discharge had involved ‘Northern Irish sympathies’ he supposed. He mentioned that when he came back in for food..

“Well,” Murphy shrugged, “I think it was just me and Neal who had ACTUAL ties to the IRA and so on… although in my case my folks moved to London to try to stay away from it all.”

“Neal?!” Sebastian almost choked on his drink.

Quincy raised an eyebrow, “you didn't know that?”

“Neal?! Mister quiet responsible family man?!”

Quincy and Murphy just looked at each other and sighed: Quincy patted him on the shoulder. “You’re a good man, Moran, but sometimes…”

Murphy got up and stretched, “well, Rohaan and Tiernan wanted to come by and kick the guy… and it's Rohaan’s turn first, so time to get him up and disorient him some more.”

Sebastian raised an eyebrow, “even a bit of skin seen through the ski mask would give away Rohaan isn't Irish…”

“Blindfold him then?”

Quincy perked up, “does that mean i can skip this damn thing?” he waved at the ski mask “It itches.”

They hauled him out, and blindfolded him, shoved him to his knees, and a few of the men talked about having him shot on camera… 

and Sebastian decided to go take a little walk and get a smoke because it was getting to him again.

After that Quincy refused to let him play guard any more and sent him home.

It was stupid, and he felt like a failure, and this wasn’t even remotely the same…

The flat was too empty again.

Sebastian didn’t want to bug Jim- apparently he was REALLY into whatever TV show they were filming- but he was pretty agitated, so he ended up taking a long meandering drive...finally gave up and texted a few folks to see if anyone wanted to hang out- of COURSE everyone was busy. He eventually went back to the flat and slept... 

and woke up abruptly in a blind panic: he could still taste the fabric and grit in his mouth...

When he got out to the kitchen he found Jim- looking adorably disheveled- making something on the stove top..

“Oh, hey…”

“Sebastian…” Jim just nodded, “Hot chocolate?”

“...sure.”

They sat quietly for a while.

“Want…” Jim scrubbed at his face, “I don't believe I'm saying this… Want to talk about it?”

“No.”

“Ok.”

They sat for a while longer before Sebastian managed a muttered, “I’m sorry.”

“For what?”

“I… couldn't guard that guy- not even with the lightweight shit they were doing… it was… it was too close… i kept… feeling like i was trapped.”

Jim nodded slowly. “He isn’t personal for you: you know I don't like him, but… he never… you never SAW him do anything: what you see is just what’s happening to him.”

Sebastian considered, “I guess?”

“Which is damn mild compared to what happened to either of us.”

Sebastian shrugged, “THAT’s true- he’s barely bruised, mostly sleep deprived and stuff- i don't even think they left him in any stress positions or suspension long enough to do any harm at all.”

“I read the report: he’s more disoriented and- hopefully- scared, than anything else.” Jim shrugged, “Also really rude.”

“Yeah, i know… I’m really sorry that-”

“If he tried to hurt me would you be able to stop him?”

“I’d KILL him!”

“Wouldn't feel sorry for him?” Jim smiled

“No? Even if i did it wouldn't matter.” Sebastian hesitated, “if i felt REALLY sorry for someone, or thought they were just out of their head, i might try to take them down instead of killing them?” he waved a hand, “but he HURT you- even if i don't know the details- so he’s scum.”

Jim leaned forward and kissed him on the nose, “Enjoy your hot chocolate you marshmallow. I’ll be back after filming and then we’ll go deal with him… if you don't want to show off your knife skills i’m sure one of the other boys will- but i still don't want to fuck any of them.”

And he wandered off whistling.

…

It was really almost whiplash inducing seeing Jim, or Richard Brook, turn into ‘Mister Moriarty, SIR!’ right in front of you. He got home, cleaned up, got a bite to eat and changed into a suit… and was just Jim… Jim with the wicked grin and the eyes and the way he tilted his head…  
And then he… was suddenly back to being the most dangerous man in England- at least- and his smile was enough to send a man to his knees begging…

One way or another.

Jim slid his eyes sideways to Sebastian and smiled just slightly, “Like what you see?”

“I… always did, and always do, but…”

“But?” Jim raised an eyebrow.

“You went from looking cuddly to looking like a sand viper.”

Jim turned and pulled him in by his collar, “St. Patrick drove all the snakes out of Ireland- that’s why i live in London, Tiger, I thought you knew that. Now get your knives and prepare to impress me.”

...

Sebastian fixed it firmly in mind that this was a job, that this was a job that might lead to really awesome sex, and that this scum had hurt his… whatever Jim Moriarty was- boss/lover/friend… and by the time a couple of the boys hauled Warner in, Sebastian was fairly well centered.

He didn't look that badly off: a couple of bruises maybe? He was still trying to fight the leg irons and handcuffs…

_They’d really just been playing with him._

They locked him down in the center of the room. There were muffled curses coming from behind his gag, and he hadn't stopped trying to look around yet- hadn’t learned that fighting a blindfold or a hood wasted energy, which … _hell they taught you that in anti-interrogation training for the military…_

Jim had sent most of the other men out, and it was only now that Sebastian noticed that it was… it was just HIS people in the room: Quincy and Murphy… hell, even Neal was here?

He raised an eyebrow at Quincy who just nodded very slowly- so something was definitely up…

Jim settled back in his chair and crossed his ankles- Sebastian had a momentary distraction that Jim really had very elegant legs- and waved a hand.

Neal pulled the hood off and Warner blinked in the sudden light, and then his eyes tracked on Moriarty and you could all but read ‘ _Oh Shit…!_ ’ in his eyes.

“Malcolm!” Moriarty had that delighted- totally not delighted- voice on, “How kind of you to join us… I see you’re in far better shape than I was, so I assume my boys have been being exquisite hosts?”

Murphy chuckled faintly, “Well i had to keep remembering to put on my Irish accent- i think it slipped once.”

Moriarty did that ‘shocked’! expression , “Tsk!” and then looked back at Warner, “Well, I’m sure you had fun anyway- the boys tell me you got to pretend to be all fierce...Oh but WHERE are my manners?! Malcolm Warner, this is Neal: Neal was one of my guards when i was abducted… so i believe he had some interest in meeting you directly. This gentleman is Quincy, and this is Murphy- no, no, no point in being formal here- you won't need to know anyone’s full name… and this charming fellow is Sebastian!”

Warner had gotten quiet, although you could see him trying to figure any play in the restraints, and he kept glancing at Sebastian in specific.

Murphy commented to Quincy, “Well, he’s certainly gotten a bit quieter.”

Moriarty sat back with a smile, “All of these gentlemen served with Donald- my guard who was KILLED in abducting me… since your cousin was one of the people involved in that and you took your cousin’s death so personally…” he looked around at everyone else, “I shot his cousin apparently- to be honest i barely remember it because i was coming out of the sedatives they gave me, but DEAR Malcolm took it very personally…” Moriarty’s voice dropped to a hiss, “extremely… personally.”

He was trying to say something- even from behind the gag it sounded insulting but he also looked truly scared. 

Sebastian meanwhile was listening and glancing at the other men…

So his cousin probably shot Donald- was involved anyway- and the boss shot him? Sounds like he got a lot closer to getting away than we ever knew…

And he… took it personally. Sebastian remembered the condition Jim had been in on pick up all too well- as did Quincy- and they both started looking very grim.

Murphy, on the other hand, just cocked his head, “Well, the boy has a mouth on him, but I got the impression he was more bark than bite?”

Moriarty shrugged, “Oh, as you can see from his reaction, he never would have DARED touch me if he had to take me on himself… but restrained? Just finished a round of waterboarding?” Jim put a finger to his cheek, “Oh and that was AFTER he ground his heel into my fingers…” he looked back at Warner, and then at Neal, “DO remind me to break all of his fingers if he’s still alive in a few minutes, will you?”

“Yes, sir.”

Sebastian was… it was like a tide going out… a sort of slow inexorable pull and the focus of the world kept narrowing to this… this…

Moriarty just waved and Neal and Murphy were hauling the man to his feet and unlocking some of his restraints… he was just smart enough to be confused and concerned, not enough to realize just how bad that was...

“Anyway!” Moriarty continued cheerfully, “While i was still restrained and trying to catch my breath he decided it was a good time to crack a few of my ribs- you know, while i was trying to breathe? And then he tried to rape me.” Moriarty paused and said sort of idly, “The other boys didn't mind so much if he broke my fingers or my ribs, but they were perhaps a mite concerned that they would get in trouble for that...”

Memories of drowning, of choking on rags and grit as men hurt him, forced him, laughed about him… Sebastian was frozen in place between the past and the present- people blurring together…

Moriarty’s voice in his ear- cool, professional- gave an order: “Colonel? EXPLAIN to this man my organization’s policy on rape...”

Murphy and Neal turned the man loose: he tried to run… briefly.

…

Sebastian came back to himself with Quincy talking to him, trying to get him to drink something...he was wrapped in a blanket? His hands hurt. There was an odd noise, but distant...

“Quincy?”

“Hey… you… back with us?”

Sebastian looked around slowly- he was in the room they had used as a cafeteria, although no one was there right now. “What happened?”

“Short form?” when Sebastian nodded Quincy went on, “You rather aggressively went after the guy with a knife- not...in a controlled way, although it worked. At some point your knife broke and you went after him with your fists- again not in a very controlled way.”

Sebastian pulled his right hand out of the blanket and stared at bruised knuckles and one shallow cut. _A memory of a face from his past overlaid the face he was hitting_ … “Oh…”

“Anyway the boss said he thought you’d had enough and … we pulled you off... and for some reason the boss had a big blanket folded up behind the chair so i got you in here while they did whatever.”

“I’d asked him… if wrapping him up in a sheet... was traumatic, i guess he… figured it was safe…?” Sebastian noted the distant sound had stopped.

“Ok… can you drink some more electrolytes? And let me look at your hands?”

Sebastian managed to weakly answer, “one or the other, Quince; i can hold a drink or let you look at my hands…”

Quincy seemed reassured and they sat there on the floor- Sebastian holding the blanket rather tightly- until he finished his drink.

Quincy was looking over his hands when Moriarty walked in- pristine as ever, but looking a bit more relaxed than he had before: Sebastian tried to get up- he waved a ‘as you were’.

“How are your hands?”

“Bruised a bit, one bit of split skin and one… cut I think might be from when the knife broke?” he shrugged, “i don’t remember…”

Quincy nodded, “Superficial stuff: bandage, ice, and keep an eye on it.” he looked thoughtful, “I suppose if you have a doctor with a real practice you trust we could get an Xray to be safe, but…”

“We will if things aren’t progressing well in the next two or three days,” Moriarty nodded. “Ready to come home, Sebastian?”

Sebastian blinked, “Yes, sir. I’m… a bit of a mess for your car.”

“I brought more blankets.”

Quincy helped him up and they BOTH helped him out past...Sebastian stopped to stare at the mess that was being hosed down. “Wow… uh…”

Jim- because it was JIm again- wrinkled his nose, “Yet who would have thought the old man to have had so much blood in him?”

Sebastian laughed a bit weakly, “You’d make a poor Lady MacBeth- i can’t picture you being guilt stricken.”

“I can't possibly be guilty- they found me not guilty on all charges, Tiger; come on.”

…

When they’d been driving for a while- they were probably most of the way home, Sebastian finally asked, “you did that for me, didn't you?”

“Hmm?”

“You… you didn't want to watch me show off- you could tell i wasn’t…”

“Originally I wanted to watch you show off,” Jim carefully rested his head on the blanket over Sebastian’s shoulder. “Once Quincy told me you were dissociating, and… i saw how badly it was affecting you, i considered keeping you away from it entirely… but then i thought - you can't get back at the men who hurt you, but he was really another of the same sort wasn't he?”

“In my head he was, at least.” Sebastian turned and kissed his head- or brushed his lips against Jim’s hair anyway, “Thank you. Did… Did you get what YOU needed?”

“Oh, watching him running scared, pissing himself, bleeding all over the floor, begging for mercy- that was lovely.” he considered, “he was even alive enough to PROBABLY notice when i had one of the boys grind their heel into his hand.”

Sebastian remembered Jim rubbing his hand and fingers carefully those first days.“I’m glad...wish i’d been coherent enough to…”

“Wishes, horses, beggars, riding…” Jim shrugged, “Anyway we’re home.”

“I’m… probably not up to sex.”

“I’ll take a raincheck if you cuddle up with me- AFTER we wash all the rapist off of you.”

“Curl up on the Sofa and watch Chicago?”

Jim grinned as they got out of the car, “he fell onto my knife?”

Sebastian chuckled, “He fell onto my knife ten times!”

“At least.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Malcolm Warner, and what he did, is detailed here:  
> https://archiveofourown.org/works/24189973/chapters/60630652


	19. Intervention

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which a group of Moriarty's men stage an intervention.  
> its messy  
> (have i mentioned lately that i love these OCs?)

Sebastian and Jim both had nightmares that night- although in Sebastian’s case it got all weirdly mixed up with the movie Chicago somehow- so they were both moving around the kitchen like zombies when Franklin showed up.

“Sir…I’m a bit concerned-” Franklin frowned at the two of them.

“.~.don’t care!~” Jim sang at him.

Sebastian mumbled into his coffee, “Bad memories- a few cooking shows and we’ll be fine.”

“...what?” then Franklin narrowed his eyes, “cooking shows…You got the boss started on cooking shows... so that’s got something to do with ‘bad memories’?”

Sebastian nodded slowly, “Got into cooking when i was on hold… waiting to get back into the field after i got out of rehab.”

“Waiting after...rehab for what?”

Sebastian frowned, “Oh…” he looked at Jim, “You didn’t tell anyone.”

“Of course not! Your team knows- i figured no one else needed to…”

Franklin walked up stiffly, put down a file near Jim, more or less growled, “I will be back in a couple of hours: there will be a meeting.” and walked out.

Sebastian was blinking after him when Jim put his head down over his tea, “Shit, I’m in trouble.”

“Uh… YOU are in trouble? Wouldn’t… Franklin be in trouble?”

“I can’t kill Franklin- he’s the only one who knows how the schedules are organized…” Jim muttered, “besides, he’s friends with Tiernan and Rohaan- he organized THEIR schedules too.”

“OH! Shit… he’s the secretary?”

“Functionally my PA- at least for personnel.”

Sebastian patted him on the shoulder, “Yes, you are in trouble. Uh, does he like chocolate?”

Jim got on the phone and ordered catering.

Sebastian got things cleaned up- and did some much needed weapons maintenance- while Jim swore at his computer and some files… swearing at them appeared to be how Jim worked: he either swore at computers or worked quietly, and Sebastian was never sure which was a bad sign.

Sebastian was expecting Franklin and maybe one of the other guys… but over the course of about half an hour they got several of the top tier/most trusted folks, and THEN it turned out that some more of them were coming in by phone or video chat. Of his team it was just Murphy physically present, but Quincy was apparently on the line; Rohaan was there and Tiernan was going to call in when he could; Harris was there, and Franklin...

Jim- no, not ‘Jim’ this was Moriarty, definitely- was leaning on the wall looking deeply suspicious.

Franklin sat down, “Ok, Boss: this is officially an intervention.”

Sebastian stared at him and then at Murphy who just smiled politely: 

Jim stared at Franklin and then at Rohaan and sputtered, “Are you OUT OF YOUR MINDS?”

Franklin looked grim, “No, you are working on things that by your own admission are risky- things like being arrested, and having to somehow fool the British Government into thinking you are dead…”

“Yesssss?” Moriarty was still staring at them in disbelief.

Murphy shrugged and stood up, “Eh, I’ll be the goat: look… it became VERY obvious that Moran there is still having issues severe enough to- UNDER certain conditions- impair his judgement…”

Sebastian wished he could argue that, but he couldn't, “Ok, yeah… your point?”

Murphy tucked his sunglasses into his chest pocket, “So, you’re the only reason some of us got a heads up about any of these plans AT ALL… and the boss is playing all these extremely risky plans VERY close to his chest.”

“I always DO!” Moriarty snarled.

Murphy just looked at him coolly, “yeah? Just like not telling anyone about going to the drag club without a guard- and look what happened? It might be perfectly safe for the shit you were looking out for, but you almost got killed.”

Moriarty snarled something about briefcases at him and Murphy just stood there and raised an eyebrow. 

Franklin quietly said, “You already admitted you were wrong, sir.”

Sebastian didn't like how tense Jim’s body language was and pulled himself back into command mindset, “Murphy! Stand down and SIT down!”

Murphy sat with a startled expression: several other people sat up straighter and looked at him: Sebastian supposed most of them hadn’t seen him in command.

“All of you: i want to see major weapons- firearms at least- safeties on and on the floor...Now!”

Most of them did so immediately, Murphy looked dubious so Sebastian glared at him- he shrugged slowly and put…a lot of weaponry on the floor- practically had to undress to do it.

Jim- who seemed to have settled a bit- boggled: “Murphy, where the fuck were you hiding that many firearms?”

“You saw me take them off.”

Jim just shook his head and muttered, but he did seem calmer.

Sebastian nodded. “Who is currently on voice or video and… Moriarty needs to approve that- it's too easy to intercept even if THEY are cleared through..”

There was a shuffle of voices and… Jim eventually just ordered all outside communications off and bagged in a signal blocker. “IF there is anything to discuss they can get caught up later.”

Sebastian looked pointedly at Franklin, “I understand that you are important, and that the boss trusts you, and all that but...can i point out that i barely survived *accidentally* cornering him after he was interrogated, maybe a whole bunch of people backing him into a corner unexpectedly is a bad idea?”

Franklin frowned and said, “what?” and it was SO familiar to the puzzlement Sebastian remembered that he almost laughed.

Rohaan was groaning, “Oh we’re back to THAT?”

Jim smirked suddenly, “let me guess, Tiger- this is like you not having any idea I felt like you had kidnapped me?”

“What?!”- that was for about half the people there, Sebastian supposed: it was impossible to pick out anyway.

“Yes, i think so,” Sebastian nodded. “Sir, like i said… we WORRY about you- you have a lot of people who care…”

“You also called me a little shit at the time.”

“Did i?”

“Yeah, bitched me out about my plans and said I was scaring people.”

“Scaring people who CARE about you,” Sebastian waved at the group of men with the pile of weapons at their feet- except Harris who apparently hadn’t had a gun. “My point.”

Rohaan was sitting back in his chair, “Sir? Do you HONESTLY think I would be party to any kind of attack on you?”

Jim just leaned further into the wall and looked sour, “It… seemed unlikely but when a whole group of you comes in upset about something…”

Rohaan started muttering and then stood up and walked straight over at Jim- since Jim didn't look worried Sebastian only tensed a bit. Rohaan very literally PICKED JIM UP! Briefly before putting him down and saying, “I swear to God I will tell Miriam on you!”

Jim winced.

“And THEN she will tell Tara!”

“There’s no need to get vicious…” Jim’s Irish accent was getting a lot stronger, and he was sort of curled into himself a bit, but … he didn't look… like he was in danger or anything so Sebastian just watched. Out of the corner of his eye he was watching jaws drop- so no one else knew anything either.

“And if TARA doesn't say anything, i will PERSONALLY go find James and Maggie!”

Jim groaned. “Yield! I give! Ok? No need to keep threatening me…”

Rohaan shook him- not very hard but with emphasis- and turned away. He abruptly poked a finger at Sebastian, “Is he doing something STUPID again?”

Sebastian was so startled he answered, “Uh… yes?”

“I knew it!” he stalked back over to his chair, pulled it around and sat on it backwards. “Franklin said you were both not doing well and covering it up, now what's going on!?”

Jim was mostly muttering, “Way to undermine my authority…”

Franklin frowned, “I don't know anything about this, but i do know you both looked like shit when i came over this morning- and then Sebastian told me his coping from PTSD was cooking shows-”

“It is, we all knew THAT,” Murphy nodded.

“You all knew that, *I* didn't know that!” Franklin snorted, “All I knew was that the boss has been binge watching cooking shows since he got rescued, and covering up under eye circles with makeup…”

Murphy cleared his throat, “Does anyone OUTSIDE of the group that was there when whassisface got killed know anything about what he did?”

Sebastian looked at Jim who just shrugged vaguely, “No? I don't think so… i mean… you caught him- thanks Harris- and i was busy until i came down? And I figured if Sebastian was… not doing well maybe having only his friends there was a good idea…”

“Probably was a good idea,” Sebastian agreed. “And for anyone who didn't know… i was… having flashbacks- yeah Warner wasn’t getting treated badly at all, but… i’ve been a prisoner and it was … a bit much.”

“Is that why Quincy suddenly had me pull you off the schedule?” Franklin looked enlightened.

“Uh… yeah, I… wasn't coping.”

Harris- who had mostly been sitting quietly watching- everything suddenly spoke up, “So none of us knew you’d ever been a prisoner… and the boss was having flashbacks to interrogation i guess?”

Jim glared at him, “Not at the time, no.”

“But both of you had a lousy night’s sleep and Franklin walked in… right?”

“Right.” Jim admitted grudgingly.

Harris nodded slowly, “Over enthusiastic… I didn't ask before but- HOW over enthusiastic?”

Jim muttered, “he ground his heel into my fingers and hit me in the ribs when they were pulling me off waterboarding.”

Murphy rolled his eyes, “NOT that waterboarding by itself won’t cause nightmares- because it does- and you did seem exceptionally pissed about the fingers, but i believe you specifically asked Seb to explain the organization’s rules on rape…”

...and everyone started talking at once.

Franklin was clearly about to go punch something, and Harris looked like he’d just stepped on a landmine and heard the click, and Rohaan was… putting both hands over his face and was just sort of groaning…

Jim stalked off into the kitchen and Sebastian- not knowing what else to do- followed him.

“... so… uh… i knew Rohaan and you went way back… but that looks like WAY back.”

Jim started digging in the refrigerator . “He… uh… married- well, she converted and her name is Miriam now.”

Sebastian made a hands spread gesture to indicate a need for more clues, which Jim ignored and kept poking in the fridge.

“Who’s Tara?” he asked hopefully.

“Miriam’s cousin- one of the people in that family who stayed in touch after she converted… you know how people get.”

“James and… Maggie?”

“Distant cousins,” Jim muttered.

Rohaan walked in to the room and very, very, firmly said, “there is nothing in that fridge that wasn’t in there before, the contents are not going to change, and i think several people need to know whats going on and who we need to murder.”

“I’m working on it!” Jim protested as he stood up.

Sebastian sighed, “Can you clue a few more people in on the issues? Please? You only told me as much as you did because I insisted- and that wasn't much.”

Jim came back out and more or less sprawled out on one of the big chairs, “WHY does anyone need to know the details of interrogation?”

A lot of people started to talk but Franklin held up a hand, “I don’t- WE don’t.” he looked firmly at everyone else until they shut up, “but what i DID need to know was that you … are still having issues.” he went on right over Jim’s attempt to say anything, “and those issues could compromise your safety… SIR.” he said ‘sir’ in a way that implied idiocy and an insult to three generations of ancestors.

Murphy snickered and Sebastian cleared his throat, “Ah yes, the many meanings of the word ‘sir’.”

“Briefcase,” Muttered Jim, “you could be a briefcase.”

“Yes, sir.” Franklin crossed his arms- Sebastian idly noted a few of Murphy’s guns had been put back on Murphy, but MOST of the firearms were still on the floor so he called it a win.

Harris had some kind of a wrappered biscuit and was idly tossing it in his hand, “so i suppose it's too much to hope for that either of you would get therapy…”

Jim snorted. Sebastian shrugged, “i HAD therapy- Military mandated before i could go back on duty.”

Harris folded his hand over the biscuit and… _it was gone?_ “Did it help any?”

“What happened to that?” Sebastian waved at his hand, “I was watching you, where…”

Harris snickered, “I’ll never tell- so did the military therapy help?”

Sebastian considered, “No.” he shook his head, “Honestly? No i don't think it did… except .. maybe in learning to keep my voice steady when i answer questions.”

“And you cope by watching cooking shows?”

“No, I coped by learning to cook- it gave me something to DO while i was being forced to just… wait.” he shrugged, “then i got hooked on the cooking shows.”

Harris looked at Jim, “And that's why you’ve suddenly had such an interest in the cooking shows?”

Jim muttered, “it works- have i blown up any random buildings lately? Killed off any important contacts?”

Rohaan had to admit that no, he’d been a lot calmer.

“I take it out on chopping vegetables and doing absurd things to desserts.” Jim shrugged, “It… works.”

Harris nodded slowly, “But killing this guy off who was- i hope- rather MUCH worse than usual?” Jim nodded slowly and he continued. “dragged everything up?”

Sebastian sighed, “The SETTING was dragging everything up for me- then hearing what he did…”

Franklin nodded, “And in the meantime you have been planning things- getting arrested and whatever is going on with this new actor identity… and all the expendable hiring...but you don't have anyone checking to make sure you aren’t… being biased by your PTSD.”

“Who’s the genius here?” Jim snorted

Murphy cleared his throat, “You are: the same genius who almost got killed walking out of a drag club because even a genius can miss shit.”

Jim glared at him, but didn't say anything.

Sebastian considered, “expendables?”

“I’ve been hiring some expendable people- people who will be taking on jobs that … well, one of you would normally do, but they are very likely to get caught.”

Harris considered, “Intended to get caught?”

“Some of them, the rest it's just… it's very likely and I don't care about whether they succeed so why risk someone valuable?”

Everyone nodded at that, but Sebastian asked, “This has to do with you pretending to get killed?” and THAT is when he found out Jim hadn’t mentioned the ‘killed’ detail of “faking his death’ to ANYONE else.

…

Jim was more or less black mailed- on threat of a general strike- into telling everyone at least the BASICS of the plan.

No one liked it

Some of them didn't like it just because it seemed risky- when Jim could just as easily move the operation out of the country- but there were also a few actual tactical issues that Jim, for whatever reason, hadn't caught….

And THAT, at least, got him to stop bristling and (sort of) admit that maybe he had been playing this all a LITTLE too close to his chest.

Franklin started setting up a meeting of the handful of other people who were going to be trusted with this information, and suggested strongly that both Sebastian and Jim get some kind of therapy for PTSD…

Rohaan just muttered “good bloody luck” at that.

Harris suggested that a few books on the subject might not be a bad idea: Jim seemed a bit less annoyed by the idea of READING about coping mechanisms, and honestly Sebastian just figured he’d add it to his growing ‘to be read’ pile with the bondage books.

By the time everyone was leaving Sebastian felt like he’d been through a wringer.

Rohaan was the last one left and took him aside. “He’s obviously stressed-”

“Nooo, really?”

“And you handled it very well, thank you.” 

Sebastian hadn't expected that. “Oh… ah… you’re welcome?”

“He’s been a lot better now that… he has someone.”

“Yeah, he’s… pretty twitchy about betrayal, so you folks coming in just spooked him.”

Rohaan sighed, “He has reasons- reasons that almost killed him a few times- but that's his business to tell you or not… just…” Rohaan hesitated. “it wouldn't be the first time someone assaulted him that way…”

“I kind of figured that, from the way he handled it when I told him about me.”

Rohaan blinked hard, “you?...Oh! Oh… I thought it was just the interrogation.”

Sebastian shook his head. “I was having issues with just the interrogation and … the cells and a prisoner- yes, i was, but...there was more to it. Jim was kind enough to make sure it was JUST my men there when he spelled out what the guy had done: they already know.”

“And Jim knows?”

“Not the details, but yes- kinda had to discuss it when he brought up the idea of tying me up.”

Rohaan nodded slowly, “then… he’ll probably be more willing to talk to you about it someday. I hope so.”  
…   
After he left Sebastian went over and sat on the sofa with Jim- he’d already made Franklin put all the chairs back before he left.

“Well!” Sebastian forced a sort of mock cheerful tone in his voice, “That was fun, let's never do that again!”

Jim stared at him and started snickering and then eventually they were both snickering and Jim got down a bottle of something expensive and Sebastian didn’t appreciate it one bit but it gave him something to do with his hands, and then he turned on a cooking show and they got involved yelling at the idiot for using the wrong spices.

“Is that… wait… is he making them use BONDAGE gear?!” Jim suddenly yelped.

“What?”

“That’s a spreader bar!”

“Alton uses a lot of stuff like that… uh… it's bondage gear?”

This led to Jim doing whatever he did to a computer until it gave up and confessed, and he waved a webpage at Sebastian, “there! Right there! He buys this brand!”

Sure enough the webpage proudly stated that Alton Brown used their BDSM equipment… on a cooking show.

Jim got a maniacal gleam in his eyes.

“Jim?” Sebastian felt simultaneously worried and intrigued.

“We need to buy this because OOOOOh i want to see you cooking naked in a spreader bar… how are you on collars?”

Sebastian was going along with the rest with some interest and came to a dead stop on collars. “I… don’t know? Uh… nothing that inhibits my breathing…”

“Oooooooooh no, no Tiger ~ Noooo ~ a nice TIGER collar… “ Jim really looked quite predatory, and it was… doing things… to Sebastian.

“I… never asked, um… you got a blood test? After dead guy?”

Jim sat back, “bleh, way to kill the mood… yes i got a blood test once you finished mother henning me at the cottage, and another one a bit later, although i don’t think Malcolm got very far on the attempt- i was more worried that they just gave me something to kill me slowly after i got turned loose.”

Sebastian went white.

Jim patted him on the arm, “Someone tried, but the first time- that i know of- one of the medical people apparently thought it was suspicious and CHECKED… and it wasn't authorized- so i like that doctor. The second time came in from an agent of Porlocks and… his agent is also one of my agents, so he just swapped it for saline and gave me the vial later.”

Sebastian was horrified beyond words at the idea that Jim… 

he found himself hugging the man rather desperately.

“Hey… hey I’m fine! I’m fine!… well you’re crushing me, but other than that…”

“God…”

“Jim is fine, you don't have to be formal…”

Sebastian didn't know whether to laugh or shake some sense into him. “The idea- it never even occurred to me!”

“Well….i’m… fine, so-” after a pause, “Did you know you are hot? Literally, you’re hot and sweaty…”

Sebastian let go. “We are ALL going to go over this fake death plan and we are going to make sure it's SAFE!”

“Seb- Tiger- everything has risks: faking my death is a hell of a lot less risky than letting Holmes keep trying for me.”

“If anything happens to you that man is dead… and slowly if i have anything to say about it.” Sebastian growled.

“Yes, Tiger… come on lets shower, and you can remind me about why i want you chained under a desk… and I’ll tie you up… and after we get done with the FLOCK of mother hens i apparently have, we can go shopping for some…’cooking gear’.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://plorps.tumblr.com/post/173818022652/sylveonce-unpretty-gregorydickens YES Alton Brown uses Bondage gear in his show- a lot.
> 
> https://twitter.com/ballisticmetal/status/998609155446358016?lang=en Yes this company knows it
> 
> https://www.ballisticmetal.com/main.sc (The Bondage supply company in question's main webpage- adults only)


	20. Staging is everything

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It pays to have a stage magician on the payroll...  
> Plot ...*... smut ...*... Plot?!

The bigger meeting… well if Sebastian never , EVER, had to deal with anything like that again he was going to be very glad.

It took every bit of his experience as an officer- plus help from Quincy and Franklin- to keep things in some semblance of order, but it all boiled down to:

  * Everyone was terribly concerned about Jim’s safety
  * Jim was shocked that they were concerned



He had apparently not been prepared for the truth that his TOP people- the ones who got to see past the ‘Moriarty’ role- were all rather concerned about him… and not just their paychecks.

It was painfully wearing to get that hammered out, and… frankly told Sebastian a lot about just what kind of trust issues Jim had.

He finally had to step in and point out that everyone was going around in circles, and call for a bit of a tea break.

They finally started talking about his plans- and the adjustments the people from yesterday had already made to it- after tea, and things… slowly… returned to normal- ish.

According to Jim, he had some guy who had a superficial resemblance to him and was dying- incurable; the most money would do is extend his life a bit. Jim had made arrangements for him to be killed- and his family to get a RATHER large payout - to provide the body of Jim Morarty. 

Originally Jim was going to frame Sherlock Holmes for ‘his’ murder, but Harris had been the one to point out that it simply wouldn't hold up: Mycroft Holmes had far too much motivation to get back at Jim for anything that easily faked and even more to prove Sherlock’s innocence. 

“So how do we end up with a ‘dead Moriarty’ that's going to convince him?” Quincy asked tiredly, “framing Sherlock looks like a good bet, half the people out there are convinced he’s a killer waiting to happen anyway.” he glanced at Jim, “Especially with the frame up job the boss was already doing.”

Harris just smiled and stood up; he held up a bank note and folded it carefully into a paper airplane and sailed it at Quincy, who caught it and looked puzzled.

“Unfold it.” Harris said quietly.

Quincy did, and swore… and held up an advertising flyer.

Jim just applauded but everyone else- Sebastian included- was trying to figure out what he’d done: he held up a hand, “The very, very best tricks- the most CONVINCING tricks, are the ones where you know you couldn't have been fooled because it happened right in front of you.”

Jim cocked his head, “yesss?”

“Mycroft Holmes, from what I've heard, is a pretty cool customer…”

Jim snorted, “bad pun, yes?”

“Sherlock Holmes… isn’t. I’m betting we could arrange for your death to happen with him as the witness- his brother would have to believe him.”

…

After that it was mostly sitting back and trying to keep up, and then giving up on keeping up and just trying to make sure Jim and Harris ate and stayed hydrated. People went back to their usual duties, guard rotations came and went- eventually Sebastian made Jim come home and get some rest.

...

For three more days Jim did all his usual work, and planned with Harris- and that was IT: he didn't even show an interest in sex.

Sebastian finally decided that he was PROBABLY getting a bit obsessive and needed a break, and took drastic measures…

“Quincy… i need you to help me go shopping…”

…*...

“-and if i don’t see the boss come home pretty soon I’ll come in and get you unlocked,” Quincy assured him for like the tenth time.

“Quincy… honestly I was fine at first, but all your reassuring me is making me nervous.”

Quincy just sighed and then smiled and shook his head, “I have got to admit it’s not how i ever had you pictured…. But you look good in it.”

“I feel naked and stupid, but… the important thing is if JIM thinks i look good in it.”

“You are SUCH a good sub- if it weren’t for the fact that i honestly can’t see you that way, i might be jealous of the boss.”

Sebastian was fairly sure he flushed, and it was just plain WEIRD to have Quincy talking about him-  _ well it had been weird having him help me get into this get up too, in fairness. _

Quincy made sure everything was set up, did one last security check, and went out for guard detail. After some debate they had agreed he should be kneeling facing away from the door- to show off the musculature of his arms and his back, and because the boss liked his ass- so he was mostly staring at the bookshelves, the furniture, the art… and resisting the urge to twist around and glance at the door.

It wasn't really comfortable to try to twist around though, so he forced himself to stop and… just wait.

And Sebastian waited

And waited

And tried very very hard not to fidget because fidgeting was… awkward.

It must have been half an hour- he checked his internal time sense carefully: eight minutes?  _ OOokay that's just nerves then _ . He tried to think of it as a sniper exercise…

Count breaths

Slow the heartbeat

Everything...focusing...until he was in that centered quiet space where he could just exist until it was time to take the shot.

He heard the door, and Quincy’s voice- very quietly- saying something about ‘treating him right’ and just as the door closed he heard an indrawn breath… and the sound of Jim’s custom shoes on the carpet...

Sebastian fought the urge to turn and forced himself to stay relaxed. He could just make out a hint of Jim’s reflection in the frame of one of the paintings- enough to know he walked up slowly, and that he stopped at a distance behind him...but he could hear that anyway.

Slowly the soft scuff of leather on carpet circled wide around him: Jim still hadn't said anything. Sebastian had no idea why his stomach insisted on twisting and it was so hard to keep his breath steady and calm- he’d faced far more threatening situations.

As Jim slowly came around into his peripheral vision he lowered his head just a little, watching his shoes and his trousers… he really was graceful...eventually Jim reached the low table and the box…

“I admit this wasn’t what i expected when…. You said I had a package waiting for me….” Jim’s voice betrayed a hint of breathiness that reassured him that at least he must not look completely ludicrous.

“...been waiting a bit,” Sebastian admitted. His voice sounded hoarse, as though he hadn't spoken in hours.

“I have to admit...it's a striking addition to the decor….”

Sebastian couldn't think of anything to say, but he couldn't help but smile a little.

Jims hand came into view and his fingers trailed over the box… and opened it. He held up the collar on one finger and Sebastian could see the tremor in his hand by the way the collar shook slightly- but his voice was steady. “I… had planned to take you shopping…”

“You seemed a bit busy.... Sir.”

“Been neglecting my poor tiger, have i?”

“Yes, sir… and… neglecting yourself i think.”

“You really should have something… “ Jim hesitated, “Well, that won’t interfere with your work but...let's see how this looks on you…”

Sebastian took a deep breath and lifted his head. Jim was looking at him with an almost awed expression, and he came over and put his hands very gently on Sebastian’s neck.

“Color?”

“Green, sir.”

Jim put the collar around his neck: it wasn’t pretty, and in all honesty Sebastian had gotten it because it reminded him of a gun holster- practical and plain and suit to task.

“There will be a moment where it will be very snug, Sebastian, because i have my fingers inside the collar as I’m fastening it…”

Sebastian blinked slowly to show that he understood and stretched his head up a bit higher- it pulled on his back a bit with his arms locked behind him… for a moment memories were threatening him- especially when the collar tightened around his neck. he opened his eyes and kept them fixed on JIm: Jim who looked touched, and a bit… like he was thinking of having him for dinner and dessert… it kept him calm until the tightness went away and there was just a slight weight, and a texture against his neck.

“You are such a picture…” Jim said quietly.

Sebastian lowered his head to take the pulling sensation off his shoulders- the touch of the collar became a bit more evident. 

“So… nice touch hanging the keys off the dog tag chain…” Jim gently slid the chain over his head, “i know you don’t wear this all the time- wasn’t even sure you still had them to be fair- but i’ll just put these in your collar box until we get you all settled…”

Being the undivided focus of Jim’s attention was… addictive- that was the only word for it. When Jim ran his hand over Sebastian’s hair and down his head he leaned into it by reflex.

“Missed you.”

“Have i been gone?”

“Yeah...you do get …”

“I know,” Jim sounded a bit sad, “We’re changing plans so late in the game….” Sebastian bit his tongue to keep from saying anything and Jim read his mind, “Yeah, i know: no one’s fault but my own.”

“Gonna keep talking about business?” Sebastian leaned forward and nosed at Jim’s belt.

“OOOhhhh, a Tiger that doesn’t know his ~place~... should i punish you?”

“Sure, we can call it that.”

Jim ran his hands down over Sebastian’s shoulders and pressed his head into Jim’s crotch… and then asked him a question of all things! “Can you even get out of that get up?” Jim sounded honestly curious.

Sebastian chuckled into Jim’s zipper, “no- not unless I can get my hands on a key, or something to spring one of the locks… I tried it when we first set me up like this..”

“You mean…” Jim’s voice dipped lower, “I could… do ANYTHING i wanted, and you couldn't stop me?”

A warm sensation- not quite like adrenaline- pooled in Sebastian’s spine and groin, “Pretty sure you could anyway, sir, but… no i can’t get out of this...” he looked up at Jim, who was smiling down at him and trying to look mean, or cruel, or anything- failing utterly.

“I suppose I could roll over and look like an upside down turtle again and kill you with laughter- just about did that to Quince.”

Jim started to laugh and very quickly muffled it. He put on a stern look- slightly marred by the grin that kept sneaking in- “Oh, well… I’ll just have to take advantage of having you at my mercy, won’t i?”

“it's traditional isn’t it? You are the villain…”

Jim undid his trousers and got himself out- he was almost as hard as Sebastian already- “Open that pretty mouth, Tiger- and watch the fangs.”

“Rawr,” Sebastian chuckled briefly and then made an exaggerated ‘fierce’ face… and Jim pushed into his mouth and he forgot about anything but making Jim happy…

_ Soft velvety skin on his tongue- warm clean smell of him-the weight of it as he got harder still…. _

“Ooooh God, Seb, why wasn't I doing this….”

Sebastian was a bit busy to answer but he did arch an eyebrow at the man

“We… Mmmm….we have the plan… it's mostly worked out… and… oh GOD… I’m going to take a vacation somewhere far away from London with you and....” Jim dug his hands into Sebastian’s hair and scalp and moaned.

_ I could do this forever. _ Sebastian settled into the rhythm of it- he didn't even mind not being able to use his hands, it was … oddly freeing just to focus on one thing…

Jim was saying things but they mostly didn't matter, and eventually he came with a soft cry and almost collapsed...and there was the reward of knowing that no one else could make Jim lose control, not anyone else… And Sebastian truly didn't want to let him go and ended up sighing up against him.

Jim’s hands ran down his shoulders and back, “I’m going to unlock you just enough to walk to the bed…”

Sebastian made a noise that Jim successfully interpreted as agreement, and then there was clicking and …

Sebastian groaned a bit as he got up- he’d gotten a bit stiff kneeling like that. “I’m not as young as i used to be…”

“Are any of us?” Jim laughed, “And in my case thank God for that…”

He had Sebastian sit on the edge of the bed and scoot back…

“Cruel, evil man; not letting me touch you…” Sebastian tugged a bit- more for show than substance- on his wrists still attached by the cuffs behind his back.

“Stay.” Jim smirked and finished peeling out of his clothes: when he came back he was nude and Sebastian spent some time admiring him.

Jim cocked his head and turned slowly, “look all you want… but i AM the evil villain and you don't get to use your hands…”

“I could use my tongue…” Sebastian grinned, “I mean, I already did, but…”

Jim reached into the bedside table and came out with a very hopeful little bottle… he spread just a bit onto his hand and reached out and stroked Sebastian. Sebastian gasped and tried to lean into him, or thrust, but Jim just said, “stay.” again.

And then Jim was getting more of the liquid on his fingers and…  _ oh GOD was he? _

He was, he was fucking himself with his fingers and biting his lip, rolling his head back and watching Sebastian from under his eyelashes…

Sebastian could scarcely breathe watching him.

Jim ran one hand over himself while he was fucking himself with his other, and then he started moving… and Sebastian could almost but not quite hear music…

_ I would kill to have my hands free right now. _

Eventually Jim gave that wicked smile that was all Jim- and all Roxie- and climbed up onto Sebastian’s lap: Sebastian could only stare at the man in awe.

“Haven’t done this in a loooong time,” Jim purred and then reached down and positioned himself, and TORTUOUSLY slowly lowered himself onto Sebastian.

Sebastian could only breathe, and moan, and mutter things like “yes” and “You’re perfect” as Jim settled himself and he was inside of Jim and Jim was on top of him and then Jim smiled and started to move his hips…

“God!” Sebastian exclaimed as Jim started a regular rhythm: it was insanely erotic and tight and the sensation, and eventually he realized Jim was humming “mein herr” and he snapped to picturing Liza Minelli thrusting her hips on a chair….

Sebastian begged.

He pleaded

He eventually couldn't manage either and was just… making noise.

And he came with a howl when Jim TWISTED on the down stroke somehow- and then Jim was still moving and his hand was between them and Sebastian’s stomach was suddenly wet and warm…

And Jim kissed him, and bit his lip.

Sebastian just blinked at him as Jim unlocked his arms: Jim had to tell him to move them- he’d just… gotten used to them being like that. And then Jim slid off of him and moved his legs up onto the bed and unlocked his ankles. 

Jim crawled into bed and Sebastian wrapped his arms around him…He meant to say something, but in all honesty they were both asleep within a minute.

…

After that, Jim agreed to at least… eat more regularly, and he definitely took advantage of Sebastian’s non-sniping skills a bit more often. 

…*...

Sebastian had to go and do a job- and be seen- halfway around the world just before ‘Showtime’ in order to make it more believable that he wasn't in London when everything hit the fan...

He was packing when Murphy came in to talk to Jim. Sebastian could tell from the look on Murphy’s face that something was very wrong…

“Murphy?”

“Colonel.”

_ Uh oh,  _ he only got ‘coloneled’ when things were about to hit the fan. “How bad?”

“I need to talk to the boss- you, ah… may want to stay as a mediator.”

Sebastian rubbed his forehead, “great…” he went and got Jim and told him what little he knew.

“If you are planning on turning on me, this is a lousy time for it,” Jim said as he came out. 

_ of course _ . Sebastian felt like banging his head into the wall.

Murphy just snorted, “If i was planning on killing you i wouldn't ask Sebastian to stay and play mediator.”

“No one is killing anyone!” Sebastian tried not to sound whiny.

“That's… what i need to talk to the boss about, actually,” Murphy looked pointedly at some chairs and Jim grudgingly agreed to have this discussion seated.

“Sebastian is about to leave town, so i’m in a bad mood.” Jim muttered.

“Right, that makes sense… anyway to the point: i JUST got told you have an assassin on Gregory Lestrade?”

“Yes?”

“Who?” Sebastian asked- the name sounded familiar.

“The DI that works with Sherlock,” Jim shrugged, “Also i think he’s on Mycroft’s payroll.”

“No he isn’t!” Murphy sputtered.

Jim froze, “you… seem very sure of that..?”

Murphy muttered something and put his hands flat on the table very deliberately, “If Greg Lestrade is on Mycroft Holmes’ payroll, i would know it- because i know Greg. Greg has been meeting with Holmes to talk about his brother, Sherlock, yes, but the only pay he gets is a free dinner and stuff like that.” he tilted his head and nodded slowly, “And Holmes has been not taking his calls, OR talking to him, OR anything since you were in interrogation- maybe because he knew Greg might get threatened?”

Jim looked like he was swinging between fury and confusion- Sebastian could sympathize.

Sebastian held a hand up, “ok, Murphy… How long have you known DI Lestrade?”

Murphy snorted, “I’ve known GREG since we were teens- our… call them gangs, whatever, sometimes ran with each other and sometimes fought: he was a good bloke. Shit went bad and he said he was thinking of going off to be a cop, and I joined the military… and i didn't see him again until he was a DI and i was discharged.”

Jim was slowly unwinding a bit, “When did you see him again?” he asked, a bit cautiously.

Murphy looked puzzled and finally said, “uh… well… It was the day we were doing clean up after the Meeker job?” he waved a hand off the table, “I ran into him and his crew- Sherlock poncing all over- at a crime scene. I was just.. hanging out watching and then chatting up a bird, and… Damned if that detective didn't look like Lestrade…”

Sebastian nodded, “So you got reacquainted?”

“Yeah? I mean he was one of my old mates? Turns out he’d been told i died.” Murphy rolled his eyes. “Anyway we've been getting together for a beer and arguing sports… I was… I was unable to be reached the day you were abducted because I was out of cell range- off motorcycling with Greg on his day off.”

Jim closed his eyes and rubbed at them, “You told me you’d been off on a motorcycle trip with an old friend.”

“Had been!”

“Why didn't you tell me you knew… one of Sherlock Holmes' friends? You KNOW that's-”

Murphy stared straight at him, “Why didn't i tell anyone you were Roxie, or how you got hurt, or what happened to-”

Jim actually put his head down on the table. Sebastian patted his back, “It’s… Murphy…”

“Can i put my hands back in my pockets and shit now or are you still…”

Jim growled something at him that sounded like a ‘yes’ was in there so Murphy slowly put his hands back off the table.

Jim, without lifting his head, said, “so you want Greg…?”

“He's a good friend, and an honest cop- and that’s rare.”

“True.” Jim picked his head up. “If i called the assassin off of him it would be suspicious as hell, Murphy.”

“Can you… just be sure he doesn't get hit? Re target the guy?”

Jim was drumming his fingers and muttering.

Sebastian considered, “Sir? The OTHER targets are all failsafes- what if you put that one on… positive option? Tell him NOT to act unless he actually gets the go signal?”

Jim cocked his head and then looked at Murphy, “Would that satisfy you?”

“Yeah, as long as you don't GIVE that go order.”

Jim shrugged, “Wasn't going to have to anyway… wait…” Jim’s jaw dropped, “How many of these people do you KNOW?!”

Murphy fidgeted.

“Murphy….” Sebastian growled.

“Well… i mean… I’ve met most of them by now i guess? Except not Mycroft, because he seems to be ducking poor Lestrade…”

Jim started swearing in irish again and Sebastian just groaned, “And you didn't TELL anyone, did you?”

Murphy looked a bit guilty and shrugged. 

Jim stalked off to the kitchen and came back very pointedly with a beer for himself and Sebastian and muttered, “get your own” at Murphy.

Murphy was at least looking apologetic at the two of them.

Sebastian sighed, “Met Watson I assume?”

“Yeah.”

“He reminded me of Donald a bit.”

“He does,” Murphy nodded.

“Sherlock?”

“Met him once, saw him a few times, i have no idea what he actually thinks of me, but i’m sort of torn between laughing at him and punching his face in.”

Jim sighed, “I’m surprised he didn't deduce you.”

“He did.”

“And?!”

“I told him what he’d missed, and pointed out he was carrying an illegal pistol too, and so was Watson.”

Jim tried not to, but he started snickering.

Murphy sighed, “TRY not to get any of them shot? I kinda like their landlady: she gave Greg lunch.”

“The goal is the assassin's all get caught, after they don't do anything because Sherlock fakes his death- or dies; either works.”

Murphy shrugged, “It would be a damn shame if anyone got shot over it- but the one i’ll dig my heels in over is Greg.”

Jim waved, “Fine, fine- he goes positive option and… I won't give the order: honest cops are too rare anyway.”

Everyone took a few moments to breathe and then Jim snorted, “well? Go get your damn beer and then you can help Sebastian pack and… it's probably better if we don’t get any more information until after it all goes down… but Murphy? AFTER this all goes down? I expect the whooooole story.”


	21. Showtime

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Showtime

They had rehearsed this.

They had set up a facsimile of the roof and the stairwell and rehearsed it until every single repetition could go off within an insanely precise schedule...

But things could still go wrong.

Sebastian wished they’d been able to use the Baskerville hallucinogen on Sherlock- just to be certain, but Jim had eventually said no, since it was likely that if he chose to fake HIS death he would need to be in top form....

There were snipers, of course- Dev among them he was sure- watching… but none of Jim’s, and that made Sebastian positively weak with worry. What if one of Mycroft’s snipers decided to put a bullet into the body ‘just to be sure’? They would have to count on their distractions…

They’d gone over the distractions too. The one that boggled Sebastian was the one Harris had come up with after spending a few days on the roof as a ‘medical intern’, looking it over. There was a building that had an office window at exactly the right spot to put a reflector, and that reflector would mean a bright spot on a sniper scope- one that wouldn’t blind you, but would mean keeping your vision on the action was difficult- encouraging them to stop as soon as possible.

It wasn't perfect, but it would discourage at least THAT sniper from watching any longer than he had to. The other distractions were simpler: noise, people in the area… a couple trying to have a tryst in that supply closet…

Jim had wanted Sebastian to be out of the country- Sebastian had refused: he couldn't NOT know whether Jim made it off the roof safely, so he sat in the car and counted seconds…

The phone was open: he and several other men could hear… well, most of what was on the roof.

Jim had already wound Sherlock up, and now he upped the pressure… it sounded so stilted, and Jim was playing up the insanity of it all...

And then the sound of the shot.

He knew what it would look like- had watched the tubing and the blood and the small explosive pack… the spray off the back of his head looking unnervingly realistic…

Too realistic.

Sebastian closed his eyes as he heard a distant voice say something about Lazarus, and then heard the other line change the music… the spotter reporting that Sherlock had jumped.

Five seconds of absolute tension, before the other signal came: the snipers were no longer watching.

Jim would drop his coat and scarf in place on the roof and race to the stairs.

His men already coming up with the body, and the bag of scrubs.

They would pass in the stairwell NOW…

Sebastian could see it playing behind his eyelids from rehearsal after rehearsal… Harris had gone over it until every single one of them could have done this blindfolded: Sebastian had never appreciated stage magic so much.

The men tossing the bag down and continuing up with the body- Rohaan staying with Jim to make sure the clothes were bagged and his neck was wiped clean once he pulled the swim cap over his gorey hair- helping him into the scrubs and the surgical cap…

They would be heading down the stairs NOW, to become just an intern and a janitor heading out the side door to cadge a smoke…

Passing too close to people racing out because of the ‘suicide’, but it couldn't be helped.

Having a smoke…

The car was already moving, with Quincy driving and Sebastian in the back…

And…

Rohaan and Jim pretending they barely knew each other as Jim ‘went off shift’ and Rohaan went back inside..

Jim tossed the cigarette aside and got into the car, and Sebastian felt like he could breathe again.

Jim- the bastard- just said brightly, “that went well! Exactly to schedule!”

“Yeah…” Sebastian could smell the cigarette on the man and wanted a smoke SO BADLY. “It was horrible on this side though, just… not being able to do anything- i was worried.”

Jim smiled and his hand slid over to cover Sebastian’s. “Nothing to worry about: we’ll be out of the country before they clean all the blood off the roof.”

They changed cars in a warehouse- and Jim used what was supposed to be a chemical shower to ‘decontaminate’ the blood and brains out of his hair, along with the temporary dye- and they were off to Luton Airport.

It was peculiar seeing Jim with hair bleached to red brown- almost as peculiar as catching a glimpse of himself in a mirror with his hair dyed dark brown...Sebastian had a brand new scar, too -very realistic and faded as though he’d had scar reduction- that ran across his lip and up the side of his face and had apparently cost him a bit of his eyebrow hair as well. Harris had pointed out that it was better to be a bit memorable for the wrong features, than to try to be too inconspicuous.

They were in Glasgow less than three hours after the roof.

They changed identities in Glasgow, and flew to… honestly Sebastian didn't care- he just tried not to watch Jim who was sitting too many rows away from him:

It was far too many hours before two travellers- Sebastian now minus his scar and missing eyebrow- checked into two seperate rooms in the same hotel.

Sebastian forced himself to sleep, knowing that he wouldn't see Jim again until they met in New Zealand…

Back in London everyone would have scattered by now- gone to ground and out of action for months at least.

The lesser agents- the ones never trusted with the plan- would only know that Moriarty, or his double perhaps, was dead… and that somewhere someone would inherit and contact them.

The top tier of people closed up shop, took vacations, or went back to their lives… no one would contact anyone- no one SHOULD contact anyone- for months.

And the automated failsafes would go off when Jim was out of contact for a day, just like before…

Unlike before there was no one acting on them that cared.

Just automated messages, revelations, computer glitches… and hired guns that Sherlock and Mycroft and the bastards around them would be busy dealing with.

Jim had shown him the message he had crafted for Mycroft… the first one, the one he would get twenty-four hours after the last time Jim entered the safe code:

"If you're getting this i'm likely dead, Mykie, but i wouldn't want you to be bored or anything… So I left you a few games to play, and one last photograph”

Followed by a code that would lead Mycroft- if he was half as clever as Jim thought- to a safe deposit box with a signed Roxie photo.

Sebastian smiled at the thought of Mycroft chasing down threats and trying to head off disasters, and then coming home to the photo Jim had shown him…

Jim promised him his own copy- hell, the complete collection of photos, including the never released ones- once they were settled: “Who knows, maybe i’ll even perform that one for you,” he’d purred in Sebastian’s ear as they had tried to sleep after a rehearsal.

It was a photo of Roxie in a shimmering black dress, with a fan- apparently from Roxie’s last performance, the one before he was attacked, before the place burned- and hand written on it: 

“voulez-vous coucher avec moi?”

Roxie had always been, and always would be, a tease.

Sebastian was looking forward to a private performance.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story arc is concluded with Jim and Sebastian's safe escape from England and Moriarty's very public Death. The direct sequel to this one will be titled "Genius needs an Audience"
> 
> In the meantime, please enjoy InnerSpectrum's side of this story with The Life You're Living...: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24189973
> 
> or the view from an original character in Murphy's Law: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25127287

**Author's Note:**

> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J-_HTUapDQo (Chicago - Roxie (the Name on Everyone's Lips)
> 
> this is (VERY loosely) based on an RPG of mine in which Jim Moriarty rather stunned Sebastian with his rendition of Roxie Heart... i can't just transcribe that because it was a complex storyline with WAY too much going on... so at InnerSpectrum's request i wrote a new story for the set piece!


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